Meitu control classic is funny. Tell me about it.

1, I am single, my mobile phone is broken, and my mood is the same as brokenhearted!

2. It's useless to be handsome. Can you use your face to swipe your card on the street?

Although I can't save the world, I can endanger the whole life.

4, the left brain is flour, the right brain is water, and when you think about the problem, your mind is full of paste.

5. What word is used to describe the otaku who lives in a special house? Mansion!

6. Some people are wearing cotton trousers, and he has frozen to death. Someone is wearing black stockings. She is still alive.

7. If you are in a bad mood, go to the school gate and kick your bike one by one.

The teacher said I was a troublemaker, so I didn't go to school. Come on, you should think so. You are an asshole. What are the others?

9. Not because I am persistent, but because you are worth it.

10, grandpa said: in our time, when we met problems that could not be solved, we wrote Long live Chairman Mao. No one dares to cross.

1 1. Look for slippers every time you finish playing computer.

12. When I was thin, you walked into my heart. When I was fat, you got stuck.

13, the teacher said that our nerves are very developed, just laughing nerves.

14, the person who has always had a crush on me came out and kissed me. If the tongue goes in, congratulations. I like you too.

15, to put it mildly, you are neither humble nor supercilious; In other words, you are blind.

16, the word "frequent operation" appeared when I left hate messages!

17, future daughter-in-law, you are so hateful, let me have another festival.

18, my own scores are all my own! Me! Don't! Do not like it!

19, when you are young, you get a zit, and when you grow up, you get a pit.

20. If all my tuition fees were changed to air tickets, I would have traveled around the world.

2 1, teacher, if you ignore the bell again. Then we have to ignore the bell.

22. I heard someone say that I was beautiful, and later I heard someone say that he had aesthetic problems.

23, between lovers, talking about feelings hurts money.

24. This morning in spring, I woke up carefree, yawned at home, couldn't sleep at night, and couldn't wake up during the day.

25. The so-called surprise is that the rabbit you are waiting for comes, followed by the wolf!

26, face to face, behind a set, you think you are a bra!

Modesty makes people progress, progress makes people proud, and pride makes people lag behind.

28. You asked me how much I love you, and I killed you on behalf of the moon.

29. I want to say that when you laugh, it is even more obscene than when you don't laugh.

In their thirties, they still like to call themselves girls, while those who are sixteen or seventeen prefer to call themselves old ladies.

3 1, it must be admitted that today is the day when couples show their love and learn to show off their achievements.

32. Whoever delays me for a while, I will make him regret it for life.

Whenever adults praise me for being quiet, I really want to open my mouth and laugh at you ignorant humans.

The sky is so blue, the clouds are so white, the river is so green and you are so dark.

35. Everyone is familiar with Go. Horses walk in the fields like the sun, coming and going, captain, alas, and harmony.

36, after breaking up, you when I sacrifice me when you die, finished.

37. Don't set the password of the bank card as your girlfriend's birthday, otherwise it will always be troublesome to change it.

I didn't know dinosaurs could really reappear until I met you.

39. If time could go back, I would definitely cut down the apple tree in front of Newton and plant durian! I beat you to death and let you invent so many things.

You get nothing, because I have nothing.

4 1. Who stole my heart in Na Yue in the year when love was born?

42. I am a traditional man, so I always support the system of three wives and four concubines.

43. Mom says he is not suitable for you. I said I liked him, then I dumped him. Because I listen to my mother.

44. Stroll into your dream. Your dream is really beautiful because of my participation.

I haven't finished my homework yet. I have something to do. I have something to do!

46. When you told me you were awesome, it suddenly occurred to me that Aoi sora called her * *.

47. I tried to be an interesting person, but later I went astray and became a tease.

48. It only takes two steps to make a girl crazy. The first step is to take a picture of her. Step two, don't let her see the photos.

Why do you look like a pencil? Model 2B.

50. If one day men all over the world menstruate, I will sell sanitary classics.

5 1, the earth is moving, and a person will not be in an unlucky position forever.

52. Kill you with what, dear.

It is said that people with big faces can't use touch-screen mobile phones because they hang up when they smile.

54. Be quick, be handsome, be anonymous.

55. Confucius said: In a threesome, there must be my wife, and I will marry the beautiful one.

When I have money, I will send the person I hate the most to the most famous mental hospital.

57. Why does Superman like to wear underwear outside? Because you are wearing it. Who knew you were Superman?

58. Be an excellent person when you are alive, and do your homework when you are dead. No one has died in life since ancient times, and we will continue to do our homework in the afterlife.

59. Some women are safe to wear dangerous clothes, while others are safe to wear dangerous clothes.

60. I have been afraid to ask myself: Is it worthwhile to pay for you?

6 1, you eat, I cover, I play mobile phone, you keep an eye on the wind.

62. Love begins with farewell and ends with tears.

63. The Chinese teacher said: How can I write a love letter to my girlfriend if my Chinese is not good?

64. I have insomnia. I can't sleep at night and I can't wake up during the day.

I am lucky to meet you at the best time, but I have no time.

66. Everyone loves the rich second generation, but the poor second generation is unbearable.

67. I am not a foodie, please call me a god of food.

68. Your appearance has affected my healthy growth. I saw you. The mood is more tangled than going to the grave.

69. Teacher, after you put on the cassock of the old man, you are an old man.

70, this year, it is not easy to have a holiday, Tomb-Sweeping Day holiday or touched the light of ancestors.

7 1, not happy with things, not sad for oneself, not seeking perfection, but seeking innocence.

The thief who stole my wallet opened it and saw only five dollars. Tears welled up in his face and he sighed, It's not easy! .

73. A day is really short. As soon as the computer is turned on and turned off, it will pass.

74. Who can I die for? Now I miss dying for.

75. He said. Narcissists generally don't get angry easily.

76. One day, we will embark on a journey that cannot be turned back to comfort us who died along the way.

77. Maybe it's because I'm too young to know what treasure is.

78. After reading The Legend of the White Snake, I realized that Xu Xian was a rock climber!

79. It's not easy to have a holiday these days. Tomb-Sweeping Day has to worship his ancestors on holiday.

80. When I was pursuing Happyness, I was afraid that I would not be at home, so I was always at home.

8 1, those who are not afraid of debt collection are heroes, and those who are afraid of debt are really poor.

82. Commitment is like farting. It was earth-shattering, and then it was pale and powerless.

Book me two tickets to heaven. I'm going to find Yue Lao.

84. Everyone says I'm fat! In fact, I am thin!

85. Today is a holiday, and the welfare given to us by the company is Sophie.

86. From school to holidays, from school uniforms to pajamas, from textbooks to cartoons, from ponytails to long hair, these are all students.

Some people say that if you love someone, you won't regret it, but I haven't loved anyone yet.

Let me know if you have any difficulties, but I can't help you anyway.

89. Lonely men and few women, it is a euphemism for women to say that I am cold.

90. The sky that just rained took away the dust, but it couldn't take away my inner pain.

9 1, brother, tell me something you are unhappy about. Make me happy!

92. If pocket money can rise as fast as house prices, the world is really lovely.

93. The mid-term exam is a big event. I just want to scare you by failing the exam at the end of the term.

94. It is said that handing in a blank piece of paper can get three points, which is called clean paper.

95. Are you stupid or not? See if you can play dumb.

96. Nowadays, boys are too bad. They are whiter, taller and more beautiful than girls, and they compete with girls for boyfriends.

97. If you have the power to force me, I have the power to kill you.

98. Oh, liar, there is no beef in beef instant noodles.

99, acne, more than 700 million a year! Acne can circle the earth twice together.

100, people talk terrible, I won't pay back if I say no!

10 1, it's really hard to find the same kind, but there are many similarities.

102, Qingguo College If you had shown up earlier, I might have got a better school.

103, I believe! As long as you are alive, there must be something delicious.

104, the most explicit compliment is that "bitch" is "drunk".

105, the junior high school teacher said, you don't need to understand this, but the senior high school teacher said, don't talk about this, and the junior high school teacher said.

106, Xueba is struggling, and Xueba is watching Xueba struggle!

107, people always make mistakes, otherwise the right path is crowded.

108, when others start to say that you are crazy, you are not far from success.

109, don't let your classmates find you have paper in the classroom. What a painful understanding!

1 10, don't seduce me, I don't know what I will do.