Tik Tok's toxic humor. Tell me some humorous sentences in the comments section of Tik Tok.

1, running a red light generally has two consequences, either one minute faster than others or a lifetime faster than others.

2. The crazier a woman is, the better her heart is and the kinder a woman is.

I really can't say that I like you, I can only ask you indirectly. I'm not slutty.

4. When you feel poor. Don't lose heart, at least you know yourself.

5. Primary schools consume pencils, middle schools consume notebooks, high schools consume brains, and universities consume traffic.

Don't scold me. I want to be your wife as soon as you scold me.

7. I hope that on Valentine's Day 520, there will be a power outage all over the country, which will kill the popularity of singing, drinking and going to bars to watch movies, and then there will be a heavy snow, which will freeze people who go shopping and hold hands. Finally, JC will collectively search and suffocate people who want to open a room. Anyway, I am at home on Valentine's Day, but!

8. Don't play tricks between girls. Anyway, we will go to the square dance together in a few decades.

9. Don't talk to me about feelings. Talking about feelings hurts money.

10, it's fake, only 502 is true, a drop will last for three seconds and will never be separated. Even if it is separated, it will peel off.

1 1. When you feel that life is unfair to you, weigh yourself and look in the mirror, and you will feel that everything is reasonable.

12. If you think I'm wrong, please tell me. I won't change it anyway. Don't get sick!

13, it's really useless to be cool. When I meet someone I like, I want to drag them directly to the prison and give them food every day.

14, generally good-looking people are single, such as me.

If it's so hard to find someone now, I won't refuse Liu Haoran.

16, the hurdle of life, if you can't cross it, it is the valley of death; It's over, and there are new hurdles waiting for you.

17, once having dinner with a friend, he showed off his height. He said: my mom 155 my dad 160. I can grow to 183. Ha ha ha, I don't envy him. I think he is a man with a story.

18, online Valentine's Day is coming soon, and no one has come to confess it yet. You are so cool!

19. If you think I'm wrong, please tell me. I won't change it anyway. Don't hide your illness.

Success in recent years can be divided into three categories: login success, download success and payment success.

2 1, ugly people can't wait to find someone to make do with, and handsome people still stick to the principle and remain single.

22. I have to tell my son a lot of truth every day. I hope he will understand as soon as possible that people like me who only preach all day will not succeed.

23. Once someone misses it, thankfully, gongs and drums are loud and firecrackers are ringing.

24. Women like ugly men, and don't like ugly men.

25. If you think you are as tired as a dog all day, you really misunderstand. Dogs are not as tired as you.

26, marriage is to wear cotton-padded clothes freely, it is inconvenient to move, but it will be very warm.

27. There is always a selfless person in the world. They would rather make themselves unhappy than others.

28. I decided to go out for a walk on Valentine's Day. After all, such a good face is always hidden at home, which is a great loss to society.

I am so ordinary, don't leave me in the crowd.

30. How can I kiss you in the dark without breaking your lamp?

3 1, don't send photos everywhere to show your love on the 20th of the month. It's not good to hit your face.

32. I'm serious now: I didn't buy a gift on Mother's Day in May 12, but * * * will definitely * * *. 5.20 If you don't buy gifts, it's hard to say whether your girlfriend is your girlfriend!

33. People must not treat themselves badly when they are alive. For example, losing weight is too far from me, and eating a bowl of meat is more practical.

34. If you like someone, you have to confess. Don't worry too much. Although there is a great possibility of failure, what should I do if I become a spare tire!

Remember, I call you baby today, and you can call others baby tomorrow. You love me today and ignore my romantic upgrade tomorrow.

36. Don't blame beautiful women for being easy for old husbands to run. That's because you spend too little money and give up beautiful women.

37. The so-called growth means that when you hear the word rough, you will never think of the sea again.

38. My money, though not blown away by the strong wind, seems to have been blown away by the strong wind.

39. All good things must come to an end, but if you invite me, I can eat more with you.

40. When people ask me if I'm busy, I always say I'm busy. According to my experience, nine times out of ten, if you say no, the other person will make you busy.

4 1, make wine at night, wine makes you, you make me, we are down and out.

42. Once someone misses it, thank goodness.

If you don't have the money or time to travel, buy a globe. The world is so big that you can not only have a look, but also look around.

44. Don't envy others' long legs and thin waist. Your body is fat and your heart is wide.

45. We don't show love on Valentine's Day, but we are still friends.

46. In high school, money was enough, but I didn't get enough sleep. In college, I have enough sleep, but I don't have enough money. I'm working well now, and I don't have enough money to spend or sleep.

47. Others look good when they smile, but you are different. You look funny.

Ever since my mother knew the word single dog, she has forgotten my name.

49. On Valentine's Day, hire two children. When you meet a man, call him dad. When you meet a woman, call your mother. If you can disassemble a pair, it's a pair.

As long as you are thin, everything is omnipotent. If you are fat, everything is useless.

5 1. Every time I face delicious food, I tell myself that if I eat too much, I will die. But it turns out that I'm not afraid of death at all.

52, don't wait for confession, even April Fool's Day, expect 520, wash and sleep?

May 20 is coming, and it's time to return to heaven and have a heart-to-heart talk with Yue Lao.

54. The sorrow of every nearsighted person: The world without glasses is a flat surface, and it is hermaphrodite 30 meters away, regardless of people and animals 50 meters away.

55. Free fortune telling just needs to bring a selfie to help you test my future girlfriend.

Girls, do you want to celebrate Mother's Day next year? Tomorrow is your choice!

Life is my brother's fish, and death is my brother's canned fish.

58. Other people's wives get angry, but mine is still inflating.

59. Birthday reminds me that I am one year closer to death, and online Valentine's Day reminds me that I am one year closer to dying alone.

60. What brand of plastic bag can hold it so well?

6 1. Why is the pixel height of mobile phone required? Do you think you are ugly enough?

62. I would rather believe in ghosts than men's broken mouths.