2022, to yourself: recognize yourself, accept yourself, change yourself

As the saying goes: There is only a past that cannot be returned, and there is no tomorrow that cannot be reached.

But the cruel fact is:

Tomorrow is constantly becoming the past, but the day I want is still tomorrow.

This is like the Ferris wheel that is always spinning, day after day, year after year, never stopping, but never ending.

But as long as a person lives, he must become better day by day. Even if he cannot become a very good person, he can become a better self.

There is a saying: "If you cannot change, you cannot arrive."

So in 2022, if you want to achieve different results, you must make up your mind: recognize yourself and accept yourself , and then change yourself.

There is such a plot in the TV series "The Song of the Wind". Liu Bang's concubine Bo Ji, later the Queen Mother Bo, taught the young Liu Heng this way:

Yes! When the ability does not allow it, judging the situation and being low-key and forbearing are Bo Ji's way of life.

While Empress Lu and Mrs. Qi were fighting fiercely for power, Bo Ji lived her life as a transparent person.

In terms of strength, she does not have the merits and status of Empress Lu, and in terms of favor, she cannot compare with Madam Qi. Under such a disadvantage, it is Bo Ji's wisest choice to stay safe and be cautious in words and deeds.

After Liu Bang's death, Madam Qi and the women Liu Bang favored during his lifetime were all imprisoned in Yongxiang by Empress Lu, and Madam Qi eventually met a tragic end.

Only Bo Ji, who was not favored, went to Daidi with her son Liu Heng with Empress Lu's permission. Avoiding the cruelty of Empress Lu and the swords and shadows of the imperial court.

It is precisely because she is able to maintain a clear self-awareness at all times and fully understand her own strength and her environment that she and her son can survive the turbulent political struggle.

This story tells us that the greatest luck in life is to be able to recognize yourself.

Saint-Exupery's "The Little Prince" has this sentence:

It is much more difficult to judge yourself than to judge others. If you succeed in judging yourself correctly, then you are a truly wise man.

In life, we always value others more than ourselves, but being able to see others clearly is smart, and being able to see yourself clearly is true wisdom.

No matter what environment you are in, you must clearly see your position and strength, and always maintain a clear understanding of yourself. This is the first condition for success.

In "The Words and Actions of Philosophers", someone asked Thales: "What is the most difficult thing?"

He answered with five words, know yourself.

It can be seen that recognizing oneself is the most important practice in life.

Only when you understand your situation can you act within your capabilities.

Only by correcting your position can you protect your heart.

Only by maintaining a clear self-awareness at all times can we better cultivate our abilities and expand our fields.

There is an old saying: "A ruler is long and an inch is short."

Everyone is an imperfect existence and can accurately and objectively recognize themselves and accept themselves calmly. The lack of courage is not only a kind of courage, but also an amazing attitude of being responsible for life.

Wang Yangming, the first "sage" of the Ming Dynasty, came from a family of officials. He was extremely intelligent since he was a child. Even his father, the number one scholar, was shocked when he wrote a poem when he was twelve years old.

But even Wang Yangming, who has a prominent family background and extraordinary talents, has encountered the biggest trough in life like all successful people.

During the Zhu Houzhao period, the eunuch Liu Jin was in power. Wang Yangming offended him and was sent to Longchang, Guizhou.

You must know that Longchang, Guizhou during the Ming Dynasty was a remote small county with poor traffic and very backward conditions.

The living environment there is very harsh, the terrain is dangerous and full of thorns, and miasma is frequent in the forest. The ethnic minorities living in the local area do not understand Chinese and even reject the Han people.

According to modern people, it is a place where even ghosts don’t want to be.

It is almost impossible for Wang Yangming, who grew up in a wealthy family, to survive in such a cruel place.

At first, he couldn't accept this gap in life at all, and he collapsed several times.

Later, he thought of the phrase "take care of yourself as you come" and tried to adjust his mentality.

Later, he began to work actively and taught the local Miao people how to read and understand.

At the same time, he did not forget his lifelong pursuit of becoming a sage and continued to delve into knowledge and explore Neo-Confucianism.

He no longer dwells on the past, nor does he think about the future. Instead, he tries his best to live the present and do what he can.

In the end, he realized his inner truth at the lowest point in his life and became a great saint with three immortal qualities: meritorious service, virtue, and words.

As said in the book "The Courage to Be Disliked":

A serious life is "living in the moment".

Many times, we always focus too much on the past and the future, but forget that the most important thing is the present moment.

The best way to accept yourself is to live well in "this moment".

I have read this sentence: I am the one who flies to the clouds, and I am the one who falls into the quagmire.

It’s me who is timid and cowardly, and I am the one who has mediocre abilities. Since they are both me, why can’t I accept myself calmly.

Only by practicing self-acceptance can you accept what you can't do and work hard towards what you can do.

Accepting yourself is the greatest sincerity to yourself.

Only by accepting our "deficiencies" and admitting our "ordinaryness" can we have new possibilities in life.

Leo Tolstoy said:

Most people want to change the world, but few want to change themselves.

In life, we always expect others to change, but when others change, we often remain where we are.

What's more, most of the time, the surrounding environment will not change, so the way to solve worries and problems is to change yourself. Only by changing yourself can you achieve a counterattack in life.

Eleanor Roosevelt, the “First Lady” of the United States, is a typical example of a successful counterattack.

Eleanor was born into a wealthy family in New York, and her uncle was Theodore Roosevelt, the 26th President of the United States.

Such a prominent family background did not allow Eleanor to have a happy childhood.

In the book "What Life Taught Me" she wrote in her later years, Eleanor admitted frankly that she was a veritable ugly duckling, and even her mother often worried about her appearance.

What is even more unfortunate is that when she was 8-9 years old, her parents died one after another, and Eleanor lived a life of dependence on others.

Such a growing environment inevitably made Eleanor a timid, inferior and shy person.

She said in the book that she had been afraid of the dark, mice, and everything since she was a child, and she was even more afraid of not being liked by others.

Once, her aunt was sick and asked her to get some ice from the ice box in the backyard.

In order not to be disliked by her aunt, even though she was afraid, Eleanor still walked down the three flights of stairs in the dark and passed through the big house where there seemed to be ominous things hidden everywhere. Then she would close the basement door and let herself stand alone in the darkness of the backyard.

The experience of that night was undoubtedly a kind of torture for Eleanor, but after this incident, she also learned that she was capable of facing the darkness.

As Eleanor said: "As long as you can do it this time, you can do it next time."

So, relying on this way of constantly overcoming difficulties and changing oneself With courage, Eleanor counterattacked all the way:

From an ugly duckling that even her mother didn’t like, to the much-anticipated “First Lady.”

Eleanor uses her own experience to tell us the truth: you have the ability to do anything you want to do.

Therefore, instead of worrying about the uncertain future, it is better to have the courage to try, because the only one who can change your destiny is yourself.

From now on, don’t be defeated by the superficial difficulties, let yourself make more progress every time, and let yourself get closer to your goal every time! You will change the outcome.

Yu Qiuyu wrote in "Lend Me a Life":

"The road of life must be walked step by step by yourself. What can truly protect you is your own life choice. . ”

Everyone wants to live a successful life in this complex and ever-changing world, and the key to their own destiny is in their own hands.

Only by correctly identifying yourself, accepting yourself honestly, and trying to change yourself can you become a better version of yourself.

For the rest of your life, I hope you will continue to know yourself, hone yourself, challenge yourself, and surpass yourself.