Wang Yanping

Some people think that our memory system is like the memory of a computer, which can store a lot of information; Some people think that our memories are like video recorders, which can accurately reproduce everything we have experienced.

What exactly is memory? Is our memory accurate?

It can be seen that memory is different from the comprehensive and accurate encoding, storage and extraction of information by computers, but only selective encoding and storage.

As can be seen from the above, our memory is the result of reconstruction, which reflects not the objective events themselves, but the distortion of real events. This kind of reconstruction and distortion is closely related to our cognition. We are not aware of this process of distortion and reconstruction, so we will think that our memory is complete and accurate.

At this point, I also understand what Miss Li said in class:

Why "it is difficult for an honest official to break housework"? The reason is that everyone thinks that their memories are comprehensive and accurate, but they don't know that they are only describing events with their reconstructed memories, while the honest officials regard the truth of this description as truth.

Because of the reconstruction of memory, in psychological counseling, we should realize that no matter what the helper says, he is talking about the present moment, not the truth of the past, and you will never hear the truth.

What factors will affect our memory?

Therefore, emotion plays a powerful role in the generation of memory. What we recall now is usually determined by our current mood, and unpleasant memories will lead to lingering negative emotions.

Based on the above memory theory, we can find that:

The reason why we cling to our own pain is the result of constant review. Every memory is a process of reviewing and consolidating painful memories. Remember that the cause of pain is that the needs are not met. At this time, we can reflect on our experience: does the pain of a few years ago exist? Remember what pain is for? What do I want to achieve?

We can also use some technology to modify cognition and emotion, so as to reconstruct our memory. When we carefully review the five things that our parents love us, and tell the time, place, feelings at that time and feelings now with emotions, our memories will be reconstructed, especially when emotions are added, because memories with deep emotions are more difficult to forget. Similarly, we can recall the love and help from our partners, children, friends, colleagues and leaders and be grateful. This is not only awakening the beauty that we have forgotten or ignored, but also reconstructing our memories.

Each of our memories is reconstructed by ourselves, not the event itself, which is closely related to our current cognition and emotions. We can change our current cognition and emotions, deconstruct those painful memories, stop hurting ourselves again and again in the memories, reconstruct beautiful memories with gratitude, and fill our hearts with love and sunshine.

| Li ||| Li Jing is grateful and builds a happy life.