Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Who has a classic joke? I'm usually not amused by jokes.

Who has a classic joke? I'm usually not amused by jokes.

Let me tell you something I saw recently.

I have just been to Beijing, and I have been to too many places. I'm so happy. Did you go there? No, what is this place? B: the place for the meeting. Many meetings are held in Beijing. Too bad you didn't go!

! I found that you suddenly grew up!

When I went out to buy cold beef, suddenly a man passed by with a dog, and the dog ran away with the cold beef in my hand. As a result, the owner caught it in time, and I clearly heard the owner say to the dog, "Be rational!" " I petrified on the spot ... watching the man and a rational dog leave in the afterglow of the sunset.

I just learned to ride a bike when I was a child. Before I knew it, I ran into the street. When I saw an old man walking in front of me, I thought I was going to bump into him. I said, don't move, don't move. The old man stood there for a while without moving, so I turned around and hit him. The old man stood up and said, did you aim?

Cao Chuanzhong

Lu Su: "Is it really possible to borrow arrows like this? Mr. Kong Ming? "

Zhuge Liang: "Trust me."

Lu Su: "But I'm still a little worried ..."

Zhuge Liang: "There is no need."

Lu Su: "But don't you think it's getting hotter and hotter in the boat?"

Zhuge Liang: "It's a little inconvenient to say that ... Is there anything wrong?"

Lu Su: "Yes, I'm afraid the enemy is shooting rockets ..."

Zhuge Liang: "Hey! ? Amethyst, can you swim? I can't. "

Question: An intellectual problem. What's behind 228? What is behind 103? What is behind 85? All three answers are the same! Just give me the answer. Answer: Yes. ~~~~~~~~~~

The little white rabbit met a wolf while walking in the forest. He came up and put two big ear stickers on the little white rabbit and said, "I told you not to wear a hat." The little white rabbit left very grievance.

The next day, she skipped out of the house wearing a hat and met the wolf again. He came up and gave the white rabbit two big mouths and said, "I told you to wear a hat."

Tutu is depressed. After thinking for a long time, I finally decided to complain to the king of the forest, Tiger.

After explaining the situation, the tiger said, "OK, I see. I will handle this matter, so trust the organization." On the same day, the tiger found his partner wolf. "It is wrong for you to do so. This is very difficult for me. " Then he wiped the dust off the table: "Do you think this will work?" You can say, Tutu, come and find me a piece of meat! She found the fat one, and you said you wanted the thin one. She found a thin one, and you said you wanted a fat one. So you can hit her. Of course, you can also say that. Tutu, come and find me a woman. She found plump ones, and you said you liked slim ones. She found a slim one, and you said you liked the plump one. You can beat her. It is both reasonable and powerful. "The wolf nodded and clapped his hands, and the reverence for the tiger once again reached a new peak. Unexpectedly, the above instructions were heard by the little white rabbit who was weeding the tiger's house outside the window. I hate it in my heart. The next day, the little white rabbit went out again. What a coincidence! It is still the big bad wolf. The wolf said, "Tutu, come and find me a piece of meat." "Tu Tu said," So, do you want to be fat or thin? " When the wolf heard this, his heart sank and he became happy again. He said, fortunately, there is a plan B, and he said, "Tutu, Mary, find me a woman." Tu Tu asked, "So, do you prefer plump or slim? "The wolf was silent for 2 seconds and raised his hand to give Tutu two big ear stickers." Shit, I told you not to wear a hat. "

Bears and rabbits shit in the forest. After that, the bear asked the rabbit, "Have you lost your hair?" The rabbit said, "Don't drop it ~"

So the bear picked up the rabbit and wiped his ass.

Zhuge Liang is a master of eight stunts, one of which is ventriloquism. It is said that Zhuge Liang discussed with Liu Bei in his account this day. Zhuge Liang suddenly wanted to fart, but he was afraid of being heard by Liu Bei. I'm really sorry. He had a brainwave and said, "Master, how about I call you a woodpecker to adjust the atmosphere?" Liu Bei nodded. Zhuge Liang imitated the woodpecker and barked twice, then took the opportunity to fart. Then he asked, "What's the matter, master? Do I learn like it? " Liu Bei said, "Learn it again. You farted too loudly just now. I didn't see it. "

26 letters. How many letters are left after e and t are removed?

2 1, because ET was taken away by UFO.

Why does Sanmao insist on pulling out a hair?

Because San Mao wants to comb the middle

Policeman: "Say, what's your name?"

Prisoner: "My name is Jackie Chan."

Policeman: "Why don't you call Zhen Chen? Correct your attitude ~ tell me your name ~? "

Prisoner: "My name is Zhen Chen."

Question: An intellectual problem. What's behind 228? What is behind 103? What is behind 85? All three answers are the same! Just give me the answer. Answer: Yes. ~~~~~~~~~~