Three kinds of dislocation of women before and after marriage

there is a saying that the more you want to do it well, the worse you can do it. No matter in life or at work, only by calming down can we solve it better.

marriage is very important to women. The more they try to manage it, the more wrong they are and the more self-defeating. Tell Bian Xiao bluntly that this is not just a matter of secular ideas and social atmosphere. In fact, it is determined by women's own factors to some extent. Among them, three kinds of dislocation of women before and after marriage are the most important reasons for their unhappy marriage: < P > First, the dislocation of sensibility and rationality < P > Most women are perceptual before marriage and gradually rational after marriage. In Bian Xiao's view, it is this sensibility before marriage that has left a hidden danger for married life, and at the same time, the rationality after marriage will also make marital disputes continue.

people often say: keep your eyes wide open before marriage and blindfold after marriage. In fact, this sentence has some truth. Its real connotation lies in telling women that before getting married, never trust a man's sweet words and never be confused by love. At this time, they should think rationally and make as many realistic considerations as possible to make their marriage life less regrettable.

after marriage, women learn to think rationally with the tuition of youth and under the discipline of men. They no longer believe what men say. They like to track down men's whereabouts and are used to finding logical loopholes in men's words and deeds ... Even if a man looks at a woman more, she will analyze it with reason ... but in fact, they are wrong. There are many real cases that tell us that women's happiness after marriage is inseparable from "stupidity". In fact, there is no real perfect happiness in the world. Marriage itself means compromise, and the highest realm of compromise is sensibility and confusion. Therefore, Bian Xiao often thought that it would be great if women could reverse the sensibility before marriage and the rationality after marriage. Of course, this is only relative, but also needs the cooperation of men, because in front of a poor man, a woman can never be emotional, even if there is, it is the kind of emotional imagination that is not conducive to marriage.

second, the dislocation between husband's family and mother's family.

If a woman falls in love with a man, they will steal something from home and give it to him. My mother has packed 3 jiaozi, and I can't wait to send all 3 to him to eat. When getting married, she always tries to help a man persuade his family to have fewer gifts and tell his parents how good this man is. However, after marriage, the husband was unhappy to give his wife one hundred yuan more. It was too little for him to take one thousand yuan at a time. On holiday, I went to my husband's house for two days and came back noisily, but I stayed at my mother's house for a week.

actually, this is really wrong. Before marriage, you were a family member. Regardless of interests and emotions, you should take care of your family and give your whole heart to a man who has nothing to do with you in fact. How silly. From this point of view, it is not that the sky is always blue, out of touch with human beings and ignorant of the interests between men and women, but that there are really too many women who have paid a lot of tuition fees on this issue; Let's talk about marriage again After marriage, you are naturally the husband's family. We don't have to say how new we are, because the secular society will always exist. No matter from the household registration system, traditional concepts and laws, most women are married to their husbands' families. Bian Xiao can understand women's "family feelings" and "childlike feelings", but these can only be kept in mind, or at most equal to their husbands' family members.

third, the misplacement of dressing and not dressing.

as we all know, women in love are the most beautiful. Although the main reason for beauty is mood, it is also inseparable from their love of dressing up. Every time they go on a date, they spend a long time dressing up and struggling about which clothes to wear ... This subjective dressing motivation has become another source of their beauty and charm. But after marriage, it is different. I think I am married and I have to save some money to live. Therefore, mental slack and hard work in life make them quickly become yellow-faced women.

To be honest, Bian Xiao thinks that this change of women really lacks wisdom. It stands to reason that you are beautiful to a man before marriage and when you are in love. You don't have to dress too formally. Does he really love you or does he love you? It's different after marriage. He got everything he wanted, and he had enough of the beauty he should enjoy. No matter from the perspective or emotion, there is aesthetic fatigue. At this time, if a woman doesn't pay attention to dressing up, it is a terrible thing. On the one hand, a man will not tell you easily in order to show his superficial love for you, but on the other hand, he has no feelings for you more and more, while women are still intoxicated and take pleasure in "self-sacrifice" until there is. Therefore, it is extremely wrong for a woman to dress up after marriage. If she wants to choose someone who doesn't dress up before and after marriage, Bian Xiao thinks she would rather choose before marriage. Maybe not dressing up before marriage can test whether he really loves you, but not dressing up after marriage is actually challenging the nature of men and animals.

So remember at all times, don't believe the nonsense of men who don't pay attention to women's appearance! Only when you are strong can you be independent.