Wandering souls ‖ Looking at the mental journey of Badashan people from poems

From becoming a monk to returning to the secular world, from becoming a monk to being a painter, Badashan people described to us their mental journey of pursuing the truth of life with poems and inscriptions ~

"The world is old, and there is still water in the mountains." (Ye Dan's Poem of Crossing Badashan People) Someone once used this couplet to summarize the life of Badashan people: he was born in the family of emperors and grew up after the collapse of the imperial dynasty; Once the son of the emperor's nobility, he became a remnant in the mountain. Although Badashanren's life experience is foggy because of his specific era and identity, we can still vaguely feel his spiritual course of conflict and collapse in difficult times through his unique poems and titles.

First, becoming a monk

-"I am with Songtao, and I don't know where White Lake is." At the age of 23, Zhu Da fled into an empty net. He said that the purpose of home is to "find a present person, put down his whole body" and live a life of "no need to come outside". Therefore, he tried to participate in meditation, understand Buddhism, and try to enter the quiet and Qingyuan realm of Buddhism. His "subjective intention" is fully revealed in his chorus poems with his teacher. One of them, "Roaring at the Smoke Stone", said: "Silence is full of smoke, just like listening to scripture. I am with Songtao, and I don't know where it is in White Lake. " When I heard the silence and saw the smoke in the forest, I seemed to be listening to the Zen master, and then I was condensed and reconciled with everything. It seems that, as he really said, "When all is silent, who only hears the bell." However, the inscriptions in this period let us clearly see his inner contradictions and struggles. He took the dharma name and passed it on to Mao, also known as the blade temple. Those who preach Buddhism also preach the essence of Buddhism; The blade, endure also. However, at the same time, he also signed his name with "Brother Xue". Snow, that is, a single bamboo branch in the ice and snow, is cold, lonely and tall. There is also "snow", snow, plain white; The dead, the monk's clothes, all dressed in white mourning clothes, are crying for whom! On one side is the ancient Buddha with blue lanterns, the morning bell at dusk, and on the other side is the endless surging and smoldering fire of purgatory. The conflict between heaven and earth made him fall into ecstasy several times. "At first, I sobbed on the ground and laughed at the sky." You can't have such a wild volume unless you suppress your misery to the extreme.

It can be seen that becoming a monk is: "If you want to be clean, you will not be clean. Why is the cloud not empty?"

Second, secularization.

-"Cao Dong was neither kind nor poor, but suddenly he became a lost dog." At the age of 49, his friend Huang Anping painted a portrait of Zhu Da, namely "Little Elephant on the Mountain". Since then, this portrait has been with him. The painting is full of prophecies and gobbledygook written by friends and Badashan people themselves, revealing a difficult mental journey. "Born in the cave of cao, tong in the cave of cao. Cao Dong is neither kind nor poor. He is like a lost dog. Do you recognize this man? Luohan Road: Bottom? " (The Eighth Congress of the Communist Party of China is entitled "The Little Statue of a Mountain") This poem reveals the feeling of indecision and unyielding when the Eighth Congress of the Communist Party of China examines itself in the face of its portrait. He found that the Buddhism he believed in, whether Cao Dongzong or Lin Jizong, could not let his soul rest in peace, nor was it a place where his soul could rely on. Who is this tired and helpless person who worships Buddha but doesn't? In his view, he has become neither fish nor fowl, neither monk nor Taoist nor Confucian.

"There is no donkey, newborn rabbit. The door was broken and I was at a loss. Pity the rest of the world, and you won't know the way in the end. At present, I like to cross kudzu vine. Duh! " Let's get rid of all these shackles and go our own way. In fact, the flame of revenge in his heart has never stopped for more than 20 years since he became a monk. In his poems, he repeatedly expressed his ambition of "burning fish and sweeping the ministers of Shan Zhi". However, to be a Buddhist, the result can only be "thinking in plum blossom painting, how can a monk be like picking Wei?" He reflected and blamed himself. This painful questioning made him completely deny his own survival value and made him crazy again. After his madness, he grew his hair and returned to his hometown. After that, he began to call himself a "mountain donkey"-"I am a monk, why not name it after a donkey?" (Chen Ding's Biography of Eight Mountain People), and carved a seal of "Stop this ear", clearly telling the world that this donkey is also stupid and poor in technology. There are also donkey houses, donkey years, donkey books, donkey Han, and donkey houses. This kind of self-mockery, self-mockery and inferiority is his complete denial of yesterday and a faint hint of tomorrow.

"Castle Peak White Club's dream, but its predecessor was a painter.

I remember that after the misty rain in Xiling, it is the best way to take Dasu's poems. "He used this poem to tell us that when he woke up, he was neither a monk nor a Taoist, nor a Confucian, but a painter named Donkey.

Third, the painter.

-"I am big in all directions." At the age of 59, he began to call himself an Badashanren. Eight great people, "I am great in all directions and corners, and there is nothing greater than me." (Chen Ding's Biography of the Eight Mountain People) This font size expresses his indomitable spirit after giving up everything. He finally found the destination of life-painting. He used his paintings to show the glory of his life. Flowers on the River and Flowers on the River record the heat released and the glory of burning. The water is gurgling, the flowers are in full bloom, or the heads are lowered, or they stand upright, or they are in full bloom, or they are competing with each other, and all life is indulging in singing. He wrote a poem and said, "I am good at teasing where I live, and Zhuangzi Tunan is near here." Tell us that at this time, he believed in Zhuangzi's way of nature, not outside, but inside himself. "The nymphs are only for me, and the cliffs and valleys are deep and subtle." Tolerance is great. He seeks peace with nature. He felt that his heart had become boundless. He called his studio "Singing Caotang", a singer and a happy song after waking up. He entered the most prosperous period of his life. From skilled to clumsy, return to the original, and gradually master.

"Seventy-four-five, climbing mountains like flying." "When you are 80 years old, you should keep your promise." The exuberant life and the state of keeping promises are integrated inside and outside, and the ideal of life and art is constructed.

From becoming a monk to returning to the customs, from becoming a monk to painting, Badashan people described to us their mental journey of pursuing the truth of life with poems and inscriptions.