Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Talk about routines
Talk about routines
It's good to see the world and meet you.
3.what do you belong to? I belong to the dragon. No, you belong to me.
4. Shit, it's the heartbeat.
5. Guess where my heart is? The left side is wrong, on your side.
6. I find you a little strange and beautiful today.
7. If you are not afraid of trouble, can you like me?
8. I have a 900 million project that I want to talk to you alone.
9. Do you know why I have a cold? Because I have no resistance when I see you. I love you.
10. Your mouth is really beautiful, especially suitable for saying I love you.
1 1. I think you are too stupid to whistle. Do you want me to teach you mouth to mouth?
12. Once you climb to the top of the mountain, people will see an arm around you.
13. I used to like meat, but after seeing you today, I decided to start a vegetarian diet because you are my type.
14. The pain is endless. It will be me from now on.
The picture shows the love story of picking up girls.
Pick up hot chicks's love story with local flavor Part I;
Going to a 24-hour convenience store in the middle of the night, the salesgirl looked sad.
Me: You don't like the Alps. Oh, what a pity.
Shop assistant: What does it matter?
Yes, it doesn't matter to me whether you laugh or not, but you are really nice. Too bad you don't laugh.
Buying Guandong cooking in the street, the stall owner has a lovely high school student daughter as a helper.
I spilled it when I poured the soup, so I quickly took out the paper: it's not hot, is it?
But wiped it for her: I don't care, but your white and tender hands are definitely not hot.
The barmaid asked, "What would you like to drink today?"
Me: I want to drink you today.
Bar owner: Why do you flirt with everyone?
Me: Nonsense, I have never molested you. This is all your dream.
Outside our business park, a group of strange female employees from other companies passed by.
I said wait, and then take out a bunch of hydrogen balloons.
They: Why did you send us balloons?
Me: This is a hydrogen balloon, because you make me feel fresh.
The new female colleague applied for the job, and the female boss let me in.
Me: Do you usually read books? What is the latest book?
She: Borges's poem My loneliness is a garden, but I don't quite understand it.
Me: It's normal that you don't understand his loneliness, because you make me feel sunshine at first sight.
Later, she sat next to me and wrote: Did you just peek at my writing progress? Don't look, it's very bad.
Me: What's interesting about your manuscript? You look good.
On the fifth day of work, she made me breakfast and cooked lotus seed porridge.
She: Is it delicious?
I shook my head.
She said nervously, I tried it and thought it was ok.
Me: That's strange. I think you added a lot of sugar.
She: No.
Me: Silly, aren't you the incomparable candy?
Play games with the female boss. She wants coke.
I opened the pull ring and handed it to you: the ring is for you.
She: Can I have my salary card, too?
Me: Everyone is yours.
She: You told hr it was invalid.
Me: Why do you think I'm here because I have a chance to help you with it?
She: Simple, don't be so routine.
Me: Then I will simply say that I like you.
She silently put down the game machine and gave up. Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Then booss, a woman, told hr (also a woman) and brought it up when docking work problems.
Boss, did she buy you a drink?
Me: I drank a can.
She: So restrained?
Me: Not really. Without you, wine is not as good as yours.
She was so numb to these mouths that she immediately found a loophole.
Are you objectifying women? Completely independent and unequal.
Me: I don't feel wronged by your understanding. You are like wine, rich and intoxicating.
She: Do you know that if you want a man, you will be beaten to death by a woman?
My daughter. Self-evaluation is slightly different from others' cognition: if I were a man, I would definitely die under a woman's skirt.
Pick up hot chicks's love story with local flavor Part II;
Baby, you can lend me 13.
All right.
(Then the other party transfers money to you 13 yuan)
(Then you transfer 14 yuan to the other party)
You lend it to me for life, and I'll pay you back.
I accidentally cut my hand today, so I will draw one for you. Why? So we are a couple.
Why do I think you are strange today? What's so strange about it? Very cute
If you don't understand anything, kiss me.
There are two kinds of people in the world, good people and bad people, and you are neither. You are mine.
Peggy piggy, I deserve you.
I don't miss you at all. I'll think about it at half past one.
You don't seem to know me. I spent the rest of my life learning about myself.
We will all lose this short life in the end. You might as well be bold, love someone, climb a mountain and pursue a dream.
The love line, lifeline and career line in my hand are all spelled out by your name.
I don't want to hit the south wall, I just want to hit my husband in the chest.
What are the names of all the spinning things on the playground? Rotating A Mu ~
The spring breeze is 10 mile, 50 miles and 100 mile, and the length at the bottom of the sea is 800 meters. Two pieces of Wan Li Dove chocolate, vanilla flavor, eight-up cocoa brownies, durian jackfruit cheese, corn kernels, chicken juice, mashed potatoes, black pepper, beef tenderloin, braised spicy chicken, braised pork ribs and fish in soy sauce are not as good as you.
How many times have I told you, it's no use complaining. Give me a hug.
Pick up hot chicks's Love Story with Local Flavor Part III;
Can I add pudding to milk tea? Of course. Can I add pearls? Of course. Can I add anything? That's right. Then add a WeChat.
What do you like best? First meeting, young, lucky to meet. Can you be specific? Slowly, the words become boring. Can you be more specific? I like you. No one can touch you.
Do I like sunny days or cloudy days? Sunny, wrong, I like having you every day.
Have you gained weight again recently?
No. Why do you say that?
Then why do you weigh more and more in my heart?
It's so cold, do you know how to keep warm?
I don't know
I don't know, but I know how to marry you.
What do you belong to?
I am a dog.
Stop lying, you belong to me.
What constellation are you?
I made it for you.
I'll give you a car.
What car?
The old man pushed the car.
Do you like candy?
I like it. Why?
Then I will give you my deoxyribose.
Do you know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder?
History.
No, you showed up.
How does an amusement park with music spin?
Trojan horse.
A Mu.
I'm a little short of money recently. Can you lend it to me?
Borrow money? of course
It's your hand.
Pick up hot chicks's Love Story with Local Flavor Part IV;
What do you like to drink sweet? Sugar-free, semi-sugar or whole sugar?
sugar-free
Then guess what sweetness I like?
Half sugar?
No, it's your breasts
You are like a game.
What game?
My world; Minecraft;?my?world
Guess what constellation I am.
Taurus?
No, this is tailor-made for you.
Do you know why crows like camels?
know nothing at all
I don't know, just like I like you for no reason.
Do you know why I have a cold?
Have you caught a cold?
Because I have no resistance to you.
Sir, the sea is boundless, and then it was me.
Cute is not a long-term solution, lovely me is a long-term solution.
I hope the passing wind will turn around and hug you.
You are the best. If there is someone better than you, I will pretend not to see it.
I don't miss you at all. I'll think about it at half past one.
I want to buy a piece of land from you.
What land?
My unfailing loyalty to you
It's cloudy in Karen Mok, rainy in Stephanie and sunny in Jay Chou.
Why don't you chat with me?
Either you die or I die today.
You are so cute, I love you so much.
I'll give you a remark about a line, because you love a line when you make a line.
It's no use complaining. Give me a hug.
Peggy piggy, you deserve me.
You know what my weakness is? This is your weakness.
Fortunately, I miss you silently, for fear that you will be deafening.
I want to go up with you.
My little girl is incompetent, but she can't slap her lover. Please forgive me.
What kind of meat do you like, beef, pork or mutton? I see. This must be my pride.
I don't like you very much.
Fallen leaves come back to me, I belong to you.
What is the next sentence of Yunxiangyi?
Huaxiangrong
No, I miss you.
Guess where my heart is?
left
Wrong, on your side.
See the world, just to meet you.
May I call you you?
why
Because then I can take you to heart.
If someone chases you, I will trip her/him.
When you barbecue, what do you bake first?
Barbecue first.
I will consider you first.
What's your blood type? You are my ideal type.
I can't avoid you after the first day.
You know who I like? I don't know, just look at the first word.
A broom can sweep the floor, so what can a mobile phone do?
You can scan my QR code.
Girl, I am as sure as a gun. I just need a kiss.
Do you know the difference between Tang Priest and me? He learns from the scriptures and I marry you.
Tuwei Huaqing Daquan Picking up Girls
1. Send my name to your account book. How many days will it arrive?
Stop chasing the bus and chase me. I walk slowly. I'm cute.
No matter whether others chase you or you chase others in the future, I won't get in the way. I will only stretch my foot to trip you up and let you fall into my arms.
It's not that nobody wants it except you. It's just that nobody wants it except you.
Don't let me see you, or I'll like you once.
I miss you very much at this time. Please take care of yourself for me.
7. Yes, I just like you hopelessly. What's the matter? You like me too!
8. Kiss the wind around you more, maybe one day it will blow in my face.
9. There is nothing to talk about with people like you, except falling in love.
10. Since we can't be born together, we will suffer together for a lifetime.
1 1. Can you hold my hand? From wife to old woman.
12. You don't have to. I like it.
13. You are obviously not nearsighted. Why can't you see that I like you?
14. You must have been a carbonated drink in your last life. Why is it because I am so happy to see you?
15. You are wind, I am sand, you are Hami, I am melon, you are toothpaste, and I am a brush.
16. You are too heavy, but I can't take it away from my heart.
17. Why do you always talk to me? Do you like me? If not, I'll think of something.
18. Do you have a lighter? No. Then how did you light up my heart?
19. Do you smell something burning? Don't! I love your heart is burning!
20. Is there anything you can't do? I won't leave you.
2 1. You are getting fat again. It's good that I can like you again.
22. Do you know what kind of God I like? Your eyes.
23. W: I seem to have gained weight again. Man: No, you are getting fatter in my heart.
If I push you into the garden, I won't find you. Why? Because you are as beautiful as a flower.
25. Say, how much shall I buy for you?
26. Speaking of it, there is only one criterion for me to choose a spouse: you.
27. Why do you keep playing games? Because I can't bear to hit you.
28. Hey, can you smile? What are you laughing at? Because I forgot to put sugar in my coffee!
29. I am very possessive, and you can't leave me if you are near me.
30. I ask you why the world is sour and sweet. Why? It's sweet when I look at you, and sour when I miss you.
3 1. This is a pencil, this is a pen, and you are my baby.
32. This is the palm of your hand, this is the contrast, and you are my sweetheart.
33. Do you know the difference between Tang Priest and me? He learns from the scriptures and I marry you.
34. Pork, beef and mutton. Do you know what kind of meat I like? No, I like your heart.
35. I like you very much. Today is a little more than yesterday, tomorrow is a little more than today.
36. Your sense of existence is like air. Really? I can't live without you.
37. Do you smell anything? No, the air has become sweet since you came out.
Do you know the difference between drinking stars? The stars are in the sky and you are in my heart.
39. Do you know how to eat this dish best? Eat while it's hot I will feed it to you.
40. Which hurts you more, an iron stick or a wooden stick? I feel sorry for the iron bar.
4 1. Why hasn't my order come yet? Our future.
42. I'll tell you how to lose two pounds in a week. Ok, how to reduce it? Put your heart in my position.
43. May I kiss you? Shameless. Then kiss me.
44. We may have been hit by an arrow. Huh? Cupid's arrow.
45. Shall we exchange gifts together? All right. Well, from now on, you are mine and I am yours.
46. Shall we learn to swim and fall in love together?
47. I fell in love with someone. She must be beautiful. You are too narcissistic.
48. What noodles do I want to eat? What's on your mind?
49. My blood sugar is very low. Say something sweet to me quickly.
50. Since I met you, I feel that life is too short. Why is the sweet part so long?
Pick up hot chicks's Perfect Love Story
1. In others' eyes, you are a devil, but in my heart, you are an angel.
Nobody wants me except you. I just don't want anyone except you.
The spring breeze is ten miles away, so we might as well be together.
I miss you very much at the moment. Please take care of yourself for me.
Tell you a long story, so I'll make a long story short. I miss you.
6. Have you ever seen a heartbeat? Do you know how I feel about you? Heartbeat.
7. Looking at your smile, I suddenly found that I am really the happiest person in the world.
8. Sister, do me a favor. My parents want a wife!
9. Can we further sublimate our revolutionary friendship?
10. Don't be sad, kites have wind, dolphins have the sea, and you still have me.
1 1. Your name is only two words. Although I don't make sentences, it has filled my heart.
12. If you bother me again, you will marry me.
13. You are too young for me to fall in love with you.
14. When you are here, you are everything; When you are away, everything is yours!
15. Do you know what I cherish most? This is the first word of this sentence.
16. Leave the miracle to others. I have you.
17. Life is not long. Don't get too close to cherish it. I just want to hold you tighter.
18. If I can have you, life will always be full of confidence.
19. If you like it, I like you. If you don't, I have a unrequited love. Would you?
20. If she breaks your heart, if she says goodbye, if she doesn't abandon me, I will run to you.
2 1. The two warmest words in the world are goodnight from your mouth.
22. The most romantic and selfish words in the world are: You are mine alone.
23. Who allowed you to be so beautiful?
24. The breeze blows gently, and I like you very much.
25. I can't and will never get tired of you.
26. My cat has thick fur. Can you take care of it for me?
27. There is something wrong with my mobile phone. What's the problem? Your phone number is not in it.
28. How can I let others bully people I can't bear to bully?
29. I never seemed to know what love was until I met you.
30. My cat and I miss you very much, but I don't have a cat or you.
3 1. I may have missed your past, but I hope you will not miss my future.
I knew you would come, so I waited.
33. I am actually a very dutiful bad person. For example, about loving you, I have only calculated you in my life.
34. When I met you before school started, I thought I wouldn't miss you.
I allow you to walk into my world, but I don't allow you to walk around in my world.
36. The secret of happiness is freedom, and the secret of freedom is courage.
37. Meeting you is my most beautiful encounter.
38. When I met you, I fell asleep and never wanted to wake up again.
Meeting you is my biggest surprise.
40. May you lose your life or come to me.
4 1. Tired, bitter and painful again, just to make you like me.
42. You came to my side in the spring breeze, and we spent every season of our lives together.
43. After knowing you, I found that I can be so willing to pay.
44. Meeting you in my lifetime is all my luck.
45. Everything here is fine except you.
46. Only those who have lived with themselves for too long will yearn for love and be qualified to have love.
47. Even if I choose in the world, I still choose you.
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