Happy moment, positive energy, inspirational jokes

A happy moment with positive energy and inspirational jokes

A happy moment with positive energy and inspirational jokes. We people should live happily every day. Happiness is very important to the physical and mental health of each of us. It’s important. Let’s take a look at some of the positive sentences about jokes. I have collected inspirational articles about happy moments and positive jokes. Happy Moment Positive Energy Jokes and Inspirational 1

1. The teacher asked Xiao Ming: "There is a five-meter-deep pit in front of you. There is no water in it. If you jump in, how will you get out? ?" Xiao Ming: "This is not simple. If you let out the water in your brain, won't it float?" Teacher: "Is there so much water in your brain?" Xiao Ming said: "I don't have that much water in my brain. Why do you want to jump down?" 2. Tang Sanzang: "Bajie, take a few steps to show me." Zhu Bajie: "Master, why do you suddenly want to see your disciple running?" Tang Sanzang: "Hey, I'm ashamed to say it! My master grew up in a temple since he was a child and has never eaten pork, so he wants to see the pigs running.

3. A daughter-in-law accidentally dropped her husband’s mobile phone while playing with it. The phone case and battery fell out, as well as the 200 yuan hidden inside. The daughter-in-law looked at her husband and said: Explain it! The husband was panicking. Said: Oh my God! It was dropped so hard that all the phone bills came out.

Wife: You smashed my phone to see if you can get out the phone bills? My husband grabbed my wife’s phone and threw it hard on the bed. As soon as I threw it, a man crawled out from under the bed. What happened to my husband? My daughter-in-law said in a panic: Look, you just threw out the friend you just added.

4. My wife bought a dog. The husband felt strange that the dog had nothing to do, so he asked the dog to pick up money on the street. Got it!" A few weeks later, my husband's private money disappeared.

5. Wukong and Tang Seng appeared on If You Are the One together, Wukong came on stage, and all 24 lights went out. Reasons: 1. No house, no car, only one A broken stick, 2. The bodyguard's job is dangerous. 3. He beats goblins at every turn and is not gentle to girls. 4. He was imprisoned and was forced to live under the Five Fingers Mountain for 500 years. Wow! The lights were all on. 1. Civil servant; 2. The emperor’s brother, the hardest one in the background 3. Proficient in Sanskrit and other foreign languages ??4. Handsome 5. The most important point: having a BMW!

6. I took a taxi in the morning, but when I arrived at the destination, I didn’t bring the fare, which was embarrassing. I just happened to have two packs of Zhonghua with me, so I awkwardly took out Zhonghua as fare for the bus. The master took my cigarette and said, "Such a good cigarette." I was about to get out of the car, but the master suddenly stopped me. , took out a packet of Honghe from his trouser pocket and handed it to me, and said calmly: "Change..."

7. While shopping with my best friend, I met a chubby boy about 14 years old on the road with a runny nose. Tears came over and asked: Auntie, have you seen my mother? I lost her. She wears high heels, has long hair, and has a little fat...

8. Reply from the wife of a female man When I got home, I shouted: "Husband, I met a thief on the bus. As soon as he passed me, I found that my phone was gone. He got off the bus and wanted to run away. I chased him to the stop, caught him and gave him a beating. That kid refused to admit it. After searching all over my body but unable to find my Nokia, the thief begged me, "Sister, please pick any one I want." I came back with an Apple 5. "Me: Wife, you forgot to bring your mobile phone when you went out. Your Nokia is on the bed.

9. I saw a handsome guy across from me on the train, but I never had a chance to strike up a conversation. I'm so anxious. It's late at night and the handsome guy is dozing off. I was nodding off and fell asleep. Suddenly the train shook violently. The handsome guy’s head knocked over the leftover instant noodle bowl on the dining table. The soup was all over my face. I laughed out loud.,,,,, Looking at the handsome guy's eyes, I know I don't need to strike up a conversation today!!!

10. Sick child: "Why do you need to wipe a cotton ball before the injection?" Father: "That's alcohol. Wipe your butt first." When you're drunk, the injection won't hurt anymore. "Sick child: "But I still feel pain!" Father: "That's because your butt has a good drinking capacity! Happy Moment Positive Energy Jokes and Inspirational 2

1. We are so happily together

My roommate in college has liked a girl for a long time and decided to confess her love to her.

Wait for the goddess to finish class and walk with her on campus.

A sprinkler truck came, just as the sprinkler truck passed by them and sprayed.

He hugged the goddess in his arms all at once. Perhaps he was too excited and his feet slipped.

But the ending is still happy, they are together.

2. Oppose tying

Woman: There is one condition for me to marry you.

Man: My dear, tell me, as long as I can marry you, I will agree to any conditions.

Female: The condition is very simple. I want to bring my mother because she only has my daughter. Man: This... Woman: What, you don’t agree? Man: Don’t you know that now stores are against tying?!

3. Kill first and then rape

By the way One day, a policeman suddenly overheard a conversation while passing by a certain alley while patrolling?

Person A: "How should we deal with this?"

Person B: "Let's kill her first. Rape her again."

At this time, the policeman drew his gun and rushed in. He saw two men standing in the kitchen holding a fish...

4. How to make rice dumplings?

I was looking for clothes to wear in the morning to get ready for work, so I put on a skirt that I hadn’t worn for a long time.

Looking in the mirror and muttering to myself: "Oh! It's like making rice dumplings!"

My husband, who was washing his face at the side, said: "This is the problem with the stuffing! It's not Ye Zi's." `Question. ”

5. It’s not even worse than 500 points

I went for an interview today and my boss asked me to talk about my time in school.

I just remembered the news that rural students could lose up to 65 points in the Tsinghua University entrance examination.

I said: "I was very angry when I saw this new admissions plan. If this policy had been in place, my college entrance examination score would not be more than 500 points away from Tsinghua's score line!" Happy moment Energy Jokes and Inspirational 3

1. The three most difficult things in life: keeping secrets, forgetting the trauma, and making full use of spare time.

2. The two most difficult things in the world: one is to put your thoughts into other people's heads, and the other is to put other people's money into your own pocket.

3. You dress like this. Are you dissatisfied with this world?

4. Construction projects and love and marriage: Marriage is a bidding process, falling in love is a negotiation process. The woman’s parents are the owners, the man’s parents are the contractors, and the witness is the supervisor. A marriage certificate is a contract, and a marriage is a commencement ceremony.

5. The history teacher said that the order in which the Qin Dynasty unified the six countries can be recorded as "calling Zhao Wei to act".

6. If you want to have free time, don’t waste it.

7. Rain said that the sky will shed tears, coffee said that life must be accustomed to bitterness, and I said that people are simply suffering when they live.

8. The state of mind can return to peace, but it cannot become dead.

9. The biggest enemy in life is oneself; the biggest failure is arrogance; the biggest stupidity is self-deception.

10. If you want to get what others don’t get, you have to give what others don’t pay.

11. If we really love each other, how could we be willing to separate in the first place.

12. There is a kind of tacit understanding, which makes you bear the scolding; there is a kind of harmony, which makes me sit and you stand; there is a kind of friendship, which makes me eat meat and you drink soup; there is a kind of blessing, called Sending you text messages to make you happy.

13. I bought a one-inch monitor so that my mistakes look smaller!

14. The marriage proposal song is I have someone to help me get out of bed, someone to wash my clothes, someone to clear the table and chairs, someone to go shopping with me, and be willing to spend money. You have to be able to do it all. Come and throw the red line, I will throw it away in the sea of ??people. If you are looking for someone, please don’t bother me!

15. The most unsatisfying thing is being able to do whatever you want freely.