Why are more and more children brought up by grandparents now?

Now, it is a common phenomenon in society that mothers are born and grandmothers are raised, fathers go online when they go home, and grandfathers go to the vegetable market every day. The main reason is that my in-laws refused to take it, so they excused themselves, and my husband was more handsome. My grandparents care about their daughters, so they help them, so bringing them is like getting flour on their wet hands. Then, when the children are old and sensible, many in-laws will take them back. It can't be said that this is the case now, but there are many such phenomena.

Grandchildren, to put it bluntly, are their own grandchildren. It doesn't make much difference. It's all descendants. Grandson and grandson are just called by different names, and there is no essential difference. They all inherit and develop their own seeds, all for the development of life. If there is any difference, it is only the difference between having a boy and having a girl. However, with the development of society, boys and girls are the same. Women can do what men do, and women can do what men can't do. It is not great to have a boy, nor is it great to have a daughter. There is not much difference in thought, ability, family development and society.

I'm here to be fair to my grandparents. I am an only child and grew up with my grandparents. I also find that most children are grandparents. Why is this ratio increasing year by year compared with our childhood? In fact, it has something to do with our growing up in a pampered environment.

For example, at my sister's house, yesterday's second day, the whole family had dinner. My aunt (grandmother) said you eat, I looked after the children, and my sister went straight to the table for dinner. If this is your mother-in-law, you have to be modest. There are a bunch of us. My sister told my aunt that it would be tactful if you carried the baby into the house and put it on the bed. If everything in daily life should be like this, everyone will definitely choose the one that is more comfortable to get along with. My sister's mother-in-law is actually taking care of the children, and my aunt and her husband want to take care of them, but her mother-in-law is more active. It is also because my sister and her husband have been married for eight years, and they have always been very harmonious and comfortable with their mother-in-law. But now many people are just married and have children, and their mother-in-law was still an outsider at that time.

Take my best friend as an example. My mother-in-law takes care of her children, and her mother-in-law earns money to buy milk powder for her children. If I change my family, I must choose between the two. I will choose my mother-in-law. First, my mother-in-law was a teacher before she retired. Second, my mother likes children very much. So now many mothers are not childless, but daughters-in-law choose their own mothers when they choose. Finally, there are some exceptions. For example, a caring mother-in-law just doesn't retire and just wants to earn money. For example, many parents in both places are unable or unaccustomed to changing places. For example, one parent is already taking care of the children. Everyone should understand more, don't always intensify contradictions, and don't always be so sorry.

Why are more and more grandparents helping the baby? I feel that this is mainly caused by the following reasons.

First, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along with contradictions and disputes constantly, and it is easier to reach a United front in communication and care for the baby than the biological mother. Before there were no dolls, many mother-in-law and daughter-in-law got along fairly well, and they could be seen chatting, joking and shopping together. After having a baby, because of the baby's education, the two women quarreled as a bee, and the mother-in-law's concept of parenting was outdated. If she didn't listen to her daughter-in-law's advice, she couldn't pull her face down. They think that the daughter-in-law is accusing themselves. They always think that my son and I were brought up in this way, and there is nothing wrong with it. Therefore, it is different to be a mother when the home is a battlefield filled with smoke. Mothers love their daughters very much and are willing to help raise their children day and night. At the same time, they also carefully help their daughter to do housework, so that her daughter has no worries. At the same time, we can respect their opinions on parenting concepts, actively learn new scientific parenting concepts, and kiss mother and daughter. Even if you are angry and quarrel, you won't hold grudges.

Second, many mothers-in-law think that I have raised my son, got married and started a family, and it is time to pursue a happy life in my later years, and I will raise grandchildren if I can have children. So I left it alone. Many filial children in the headlines say that my mother has no obligation to take care of your children. When she is old and needs to be taken care of in the hospital bed, you have the responsibility to take care of her! Why? Just because she is my mother, the mother who worked hard to raise me. I'm really sorry. Love and being loved are mutual. No pains, no gains. It is true that the elderly can learn western theories, but when they are old, they have no morality to kidnap their daughter-in-law to support her. Parents' families maintain close interaction with small families, while others respect each other and do not cross the line. What people mean is that it is the responsibility of children to raise and educate their grandchildren, and they will not tell their daughter-in-law what to do, will they? Not to mention: "I am sick and need someone to take care of me." Should my daughter-in-law be served by Dai Yue? " Rights and obligations are also complementary. Therefore, you love others in order to give them reasons to love you.

The third is to consider asking a nanny to look after the children. However, due to the frequent incidents of stealing or abusing children, parents have many doubts about nannies, and the quality of nannies is mixed. They are not optimistic about their children's enlightenment education. Even if you dare to hire a nanny, you have to have your own family to take care of you, so you can rest assured, but the economic pressure is too great.

Fourth, ask the children's grandparents for help, but the eternal problem-the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is inevitable, and the husband is in a dilemma between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Even if the wife is open-minded, but under the same roof, regardless of living habits or educational concepts, the differences are naturally like a moat. We can respect each other in the short term, and gradually have differences over time, which will affect the feelings of husband and wife and undermine family harmony. It is not worth the loss, and it is too late to regret it;

Fifth, I hope that grandparents will take care of their grandchildren out of love for their daughters and help their daughters after retirement. The reasons for their confidence are: on the one hand, if the son-in-law knows something, the old couple will love me, love my dog and live in peace with them. Moreover, the financial power of the family is in the hands of the daughter, and the son-in-law is mostly obedient; On the other hand, it goes without saying that daughters have lived with their parents since childhood, and their living habits are the same. Occasionally, contradictions are also contradictions among the people. My daughter is my mother's intimate cotton-padded jacket and my father's ex-lover. How harmonious this relationship is!

Sixth, grandparents failed to educate their daughters through three views: parents are the first teachers of their children. Nowadays, parents born after 1980s and 1990s are all only children. The education they received when they were young was that they didn't have to do anything, as long as they studied hard and got the first place in the exam. Facts have proved that human growth is all-round, including not only the learning and accumulation of knowledge, but also personality, personality, life ability and problem-solving ability. The previous generation of parents passed on an imperfect outlook on life, values and world outlook to their children. Children are the product of formal education, and the core values of this family all come from the family. When I grow up, I will inherit and carry forward. If the three views are destroyed, it is conceivable that my grandparents just deserve it.

On the issue of treating grandchildren, both parents-in-law are competing to take care of them. Grandparents are not old now. They are both parents. They know the hardships of being parents, love and how to love. Are discussing or taking turns to support their grandchildren. The parents of the younger generation are trying to arrange their time reasonably. Sometimes I live in my parents' house, and sometimes I live in the other parents' house, so that the elderly are no longer disappointed. Some parents of the younger generation want to have two children, so that there will be no embarrassment of having an only child in the future. Let one child take his father's surname and one his mother's surname.