"Daughter-in-law, hurry home to cook after work". Is this treating her like a servant?

Ms. Chen, self-report: When my sister-in-law was pregnant for seven months, my mother asked me to hire a nanny or ask my mother-in-law to help me take care of the children, because my sister-in-law was about to give birth. After my sister-in-law is born, my mother will go back to take care of her. I also know that my sister-in-law is my mother's daughter-in-law, and my mother naturally can't leave her daughter-in-law for me. So I told my husband Zhang Ming to ask the nanny to go home and take care of my daughter. Anyway, my daughter is one year old, but my husband said that it is too expensive to ask a nanny now and let her mother-in-law help take care of her daughter.

I don't know what to say to my mother-in-law, because I gave birth to my daughter, and she is a little unhappy. When I was in confinement, she saw her mother taking care of me here and went straight back to her hometown. Her daughter is one year old, and her mother-in-law hasn't visited me several times. I don't want my mother-in-law to take care of my daughter, but Zhang Ming said, I don't like it. After all, the mother-in-law is her daughter's grandmother and should take good care of her daughter. I still have to rest assured that Zhang Ming has said so, so I won't stop it.

After Zhang Ming and I took my mother-in-law home, my mother went back to look after my sister-in-law. Although her mother-in-law didn't like her granddaughter very much, Zhang Ming spoke and her mother-in-law promised to take care of her daughter. However, I can see that my mother-in-law is not very concerned about taking care of her daughter. More importantly, the mother-in-law only takes her daughter at home and doesn't do any housework. In the past, when my mother was here, she helped us with the housework while taking care of her daughter. Zhang Ming said, I'll bear it. It is the same for us to do housework when we come back from work.

Even if mother-in-law doesn't do housework, she doesn't even cook dinner. Every day before work, her mother-in-law began to call and asked me to go back to cook early. I don't like my mother-in-law. She just takes care of her daughter all day. If so, what should I ask her to do? More importantly, taking care of your daughter is not good at all. My daughter used to be clean when my mother helped me take care of her. Now my mother-in-law helps me with my daughter. As soon as I got home from work, I saw her dirty. A few times, I came home from work and found her daughter.

After my mother-in-law came, not only did she not lighten our burden, but she added a lot of trouble to me. That night, I asked Zhang Ming to tell her mother-in-law. Now my daughter is still young, so are Zhang Ming and me. We young people are working hard outside, so as an old man, you can help us a little. Besides, I am not the kind of person who is ungrateful. You can help me now or later. Zhang Ming promised verbally. The next morning, I packed my things and went to work. My mother-in-law stopped me and said, Daughter-in-law, go home from work and cook. I've been here for a month or two, and I didn't eat until seven or eight in the evening. I am in poor health and can't stand being hungry.

I was really angry at that time. If she can help me a little, can I have dinner before that? I said angrily, mom, I'll hire a nanny when you go home. After I finished this, my mother-in-law said that I hated her for driving her away. She also said that she was kind enough to help me take care of my daughter, but now she wants to drive her away. If I had known, I shouldn't have asked my mother-in-law to help with my daughter. Finally, I decided to hire a nanny and ask Zhang Ming to take her back. In fact, my requirements are really not high. I don't expect the old man to give me much help, but at least you can't give me a trip!

Summary: In today's families, the old people usually take care of their children at home, and then the young people work hard outside. Ms. Chen, maybe your mother-in-law is a little biased against you because you didn't have a son. In fact, in this case, it would be better to hire a nanny if economic conditions permit. At least, there will be no additional contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. However, then again, elders should also know how to share with their children, so as to be kind and filial!