Talking about Daquan, Funny and Classic.

1, my friend said, hey, you are really good. Long time no see, you have gained weight.

Someone said I was ugly, but I smiled. You've never met my friend.

For Russia, the happiest thing is to go shopping hand in hand.

4. Were you vomited three times after you were born, but only caught twice?

5. God knows nothing. I know nothing, because I am second only to God.

Every Monday is the busiest time for us to study, because we have to leave one eye for homework and the other for the class teacher.

7, a person, listening to the songs of two people, so warm and sad.

8, Wensi 3,000 is not as good as chest 4 beams, and a talented person is not as good as half a catty!

9. You say you are my friend, but in fact, I know that animals are indeed friends of human beings.

10, it's not hard to be single, but it's hard to deal with those who try their best to make you end it.

1 1, I want you to listen, love you to see, and I am not afraid to admit how attached I am; When I miss you, I hope you can receive my sincere message!

12, the furthest distance in the world is not life and death, but there are many WIFI nearby, but we don't know the password.

13, the parent-teacher conference is the same as * *, aiming at destroying family harmony!

14, I came quietly and left quietly, waving a dagger and leaving no one alive.

15, I don't like sleeping with only one woman many times, but I like sleeping with many women only once.

16, when I looked at you stupidly, did you look at me stupidly?

17, I changed her from a girl to a woman; She turned me from a boy into a poor man.

18, I don't think I'm bad, you think I'm good, do you want to try to fall in love with me?

19, Fan Ju in the Warring States Period was the first person to record procrastination. He said: revenge is never too late for a gentleman.

20. I'm so afraid of being blown into other people's arms by a typhoon. After all, people like me will definitely not quit.

2 1, a pot of wine in the flowers, free cigarettes; Until, holding up my cup, I asked the moon that there was no money; Have sex when you wake up and pay when you are drunk. Will goodwill be guaranteed? , eat and drink!

22. Sometimes I feel ugly. When I took out my ID card, I found it worrying.

23. Weather and forecast are a twisted pair: whatever you say, I'm not that good.

24. I don't show off the monthly exam to teachers in all subjects. They really feel that they are teaching very well.

25. God, did you share a room in summer and winter? This kind of weather!

26, jealous, don't be a dog, is it interesting to stab in the back?

Please don't shit in front of the fly, it will think you are showing off your wealth.

28. When I am bored in the classroom, I fantasize about the bloody scene where the ceiling fan rotates every time.

29. I heard that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually streaked in Too Many Cooks for 20 years!

30. The only thing that keeps growing up is to charge your mobile phone every day.

3 1. What TV did we watch? At the end, the hero and heroine get married and the TV ends. What does this mean? Explanation: It's over as soon as you get married.

32. When I woke up this morning, I thought I had grown up. I took a closer look and found that the quilt cover was horizontal!

In fact, your nagging is the happiest time in my life, but I just don't know it.

34. At that time, I was also an infatuated seed, but I was killed by lightning.

35, one-on-one hit, one-on-one hit, although I will lose physically, I will never lose mentally to you.

In the future, if you get married and it's not me, I'll move next door to your house and be a quiet old king.

When I am angry, can you stop pouting and look at me with innocent eyes, which makes me want to laugh? I'm angry, okay?

38. A: It's hard to swallow this evil spirit if this revenge is not reported. B: Then how can I let you die?

39. Your predecessor got married. Would you like to attend her wedding? I just want to attend your funeral!

40. The most romantic thing I can think of is that you are getting older day by day while I am still young.

4 1, that question, I vaguely remember what the teacher said, but I clearly remember that I didn't listen.

42. My current relationship is to accumulate experience for my son.

Thank you for always being with me, rain or shine, please remember that I am always there.

44. The outstanding Young Pioneers in primary schools are probably the pinnacle of my life.

The most precious thing in the world is not what I can't get and what I lose, but the happiness I have now.

46. Carve loneliness on the bottle, drink it into the bladder and pee it out, so that loneliness can be spilled everywhere!

47. How long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting in the toilet or waiting outside.

48. Don't say that others are mentally ill. The premise of having a brain is that you must have a brain.

49. I never bully the weak ~ ~ ~ I didn't know he was weaker than me before I bullied him.

50. Between waking and dreaming, your figure appeared and snuggled in your arms, which I can't tell you. I wonder if I can feel your temperature again!

5 1, don't think that just because a girl is beautiful can seduce me, at least she is stupid enough!

52. I want food, and I want thin food. I can't have both, so I left.

53. It is obvious that the school slag system needs not only power consumption but also special cards to start any school hegemony mode.

54. One day in the world, with thick soil as evidence, I would like to exchange 20 Jin of meat for the good weather in China this year!

55. I have lived for more than 20 years and have done nothing for the country and the people. Every time I think about it, my heart aches.

When this person is unlucky, he can frighten himself by sneezing, take off his sweater and electrocute himself.

57. The coat is clean, others pay attention to the collar, and the wife pays attention to the pocket.

58. There is a prison called a school, a prisoner called a student and a warden called a teacher.

59. In spring, you planted a girlfriend in the back hill, and in autumn, you are cuckolded everywhere!

60. Miss you, miss you so much, find a painter to draw you, stick you in a cup, drink water every day and kiss you.

6 1, the mobile phone paid for a week, and when I got it back, I found that the games were all cleared.

62. Every time a new book is published, the first reaction is to turn to the last page to see if there is an answer.

63. Take a trip on this spring day. I'll take you, you get the money.

64. Most people who love food are not bad people. They are hungry for food and have no time to hurt others.

65. We should cherish everyone around us, because looking back at the broken neck in our last life, we met in this life.

66. Don't complain about life all day. Life will never know who you are, let alone listen to your complaints.

67. What is a class teacher? It is a person who has destroyed your friendship, your love and your affection.

68. Examinations are like getting sick. Depression before the exam, amnesia during the exam. After the exam, my condition began to improve. I had a heart attack when I got my test paper back.

69. Since you like someone who is far away, it is better to take the opportunity to like more.

70. Unconsciously, our love has gone through a whole year, during which we have all experienced a lot.

7 1, you know, no matter what troubles or difficulties you encounter, tell me as soon as possible, and I will praise you as soon as possible.

72. Although you wear perfume, I can still vaguely smell the scum.

73. Don't look at what you should see, don't say what you shouldn't say, don't listen to what you shouldn't hear, don't think about what you shouldn't think, and do what you should do.

74. When a man doesn't belong to you, let you sigh what is perfect, and when he belongs to you, let you sigh what is true.

75. The bell in class is sweeter than the national anthem, and it collapses more than anxiety.

76. When I was a child, I thought I could save the world when I grew up. When I grow up, I find that the whole world can't save me.

77. Both girls love you. One is beautiful and talented, and the other is gentle and housekeeping. Which one do you choose? -Leave home first.

78. Find out the script of your life-not a sequel to your parents, a prequel to your children, or a foreign story of your friends.

79, fart quickly, the heart is not good; Do not fart, exercise; I'm going to fart, everyone. Fart rang, everyone applauded!

80. I love you so inexplicably and without hesitation. I know I won't be the only one in your life, but you are the love of my life!

8 1, the sign of immature men is that they can die bravely for their ideals, and the sign of mature men is that they can live humbly for their ideals.

82. The happiest thing in life is to hear my wife say take your paws off in the morning!

83, in the shower, please do not disturb, peep, please buy a ticket, 40 individuals, 20 groups!

There are always many coincidences in life, and two parallel lines may meet one day.

85. Old people can't kill children, women and men.

86. If one day you suddenly disappear, do you think someone will look for you crazily? -If I still owe the bank mortgage and car loan.

87. It's good to have you in this life, sister. Always by your side. I love you, my sister.

88. I am a passer-by who you turn around and forget. Why should I spend time with you on earth?

89. Eating handfuls of candy, leading Kojiro, carrying a big schoolbag, squeezing the car to school. Adults love fashion, children have a heavy burden, more buses and fewer short skirts!

90. Nothing is free these days, even air costs money, such as a bag of potato chips.