Funny toxic chicken soup joke

1. If you don't like your house, you can get a new one. If you don't like your city, you can move to another city; If you don't like your country, you can even immigrate.

Money is the root of all evil, but if you have no money, the whole society will despise you.

Many people find that they can't compete with others on the issue of money, power and women, so they begin to try to make a fuss about morality and life realm.

If you want to succeed, you must try your best to realize the expectations of everyone around you, and do so until you die. However, if you want to fail, you just need to live in the opposite way.

There are 6 billion people in the world, and you are nothing special. If you really want to be different from ordinary people, you can only walk backwards.

6, more terrible than tooth emphysema and liver cancer is aging, so please live in the moment!

7. I have a friend with an average family background, who always thinks that being rich makes me happier. Later, his mother made a fortune doing infant education. I met him almost ten years later and asked: Now that you have money, are you really happy? He replied: It's awesome! I walked away silently.

Tall people only date tall people, so if you are short, don't bother to look up.

9. If you are beautiful, people will envy you, because everyone thinks that beautiful people have a perfect life, so no one will sympathize with your misfortune, and you can only live alone.

If you are ugly, people will like you because you are uglier than them. But people won't love you just because you are uglier than them, so you are doomed to be lonely all your life.

1 1. Almost everyone in the world watches TV, but no TV series presents real life. If you spend 10% of your time watching TV plays every day, you will find yourself increasingly disappointed in the world.

12, if you do more work than others every day, but you are happy and feel valued, then your leader is more competent and talented than you.

13. I used to think that people who rely on relationships must be very incompetent. After contact, I found that people are better than me in everything.

14, the so-called "Don't let your child lose at the starting line" is meaningless, because you are the starting line and your child has already lost.

Another day has passed. How was your day? Did you dream?

16, you worked so hard and endured so much loneliness and entanglement, and we didn't think you were excellent.

17. Some young people shape their image of high-end income through high-end consumption.

18, some girls think that saying that they are foodies can look cute, but there is no such effect.

19. Love is like an apple in a grocery store. You can't find a flawless one. Everyone is not perfect, especially yourself.

We are all small members of the vast universe, but we still meet the most self-righteous creature in the universe, that is, human beings.

Classic funny sayings, this chicken soup is poisonous.

1, if you are good-looking and fall asleep on the bus and subway, rest your head on the shoulder of the person next to you, who will accompany you until you wake up. If you are ugly, once your head rests on the shoulder of the person next to you, he will wake you up and remind you to take care of your belongings. If you think you are as tired as a dog all day, it's all wet. Dogs are not as tired as you.

People who are better than you are still working hard, so what's the use of your efforts?

4. Why do I always feel ordinary? Maybe it's because you are really ordinary.

When God closes a door for you, it will also clamp your brain.

6. If life deceives you today, don't be sad or cry, because life will deceive you tomorrow.

7. In the past, cars and horses were slow and letters were far away. I have only loved one person in my life, but I can accommodate many concubines.

Some girls spend half an hour every day mixing dog food and taking it outside to feed stray dogs. But she only calls home once every half month.

9. There is a loquat tree in the yard. My wife planted it herself when she died. Now it is as elegant as the cover. I cut it again, but Bo Xiao Niang smiled. . .

10, when it comes to money, people are not so affectionate.

1 1. People who are not good-looking are not necessarily good. Just because of long-term loneliness, I sometimes treat people as crazy.

12, when someone tells you that you are busy, it is he or she who wants to leave time to more important people.

13, don't lose weight, you are ugly not just because you are fat.

14, the so-called female man, just because she is ugly, but all beautiful girls with manly temperament are called queens.

15, life will make you miserable for a while, and then make you miserable for a lifetime after you get used to it.

16, if you don't marry me in ten years, then we are, too bad, too bad.

17, whenever I find the key to success, I find someone secretly changing the lock.

18, it took me all my luck to meet you, and I have been unlucky since I met you.

19, I don't like you, I just happen to be playing with my mobile phone.

20, I lack calcium! Why always sprain your ankle? You are not calcium deficient, you are brain deficient. Why don't you look at the road when you walk?

2 1, why do you watch something else during work hours? Because the salary is not focused enough.

Poisonous chicken soup is poisonous.

Poisonous chicken soup is poisonous.

1, I am like a fly lying on the glass, with a bright future, but I can't find a way out.

2. I passed a person countless times, and the clothes were all scratched and there was no spark.

I didn't mean to be different, so I have to have outstanding taste.

Fighting is like talking on the phone. Either you hang up first, or I hang up first!

5. Are you angry? Is it oxygen or hydrogen? If it's hydrogen, squat in the corner and blow yourself up.

If one day I become a hooligan, please tell others that I have always been innocent. In my world, I am still pure, and the only dirty thing is this world …

7. If you sleep one minute less, you will lose 60 seconds of happiness.

8. I think what a woman is most proud of is not how beautiful she looks, but how many women her man will refuse for her.

Interesting toxic chicken soup for the soul

1, early to bed and early to rise are all working dogs, and rich people will stay in bed.

Everyone is proud of being a master of experience, and will teach you at every turn. What you have to do is: don't listen if you don't listen.

You may not be able to do what you say, so be careful.

If you want to succeed, you must try your best to realize the expectations of everyone around you, and do so until you die. However, if you want to fail, you just need to live in the opposite way.

There are 6 billion people in the world, and you are nothing special. If you really want to be different from ordinary people, you can only walk backwards.

6, more terrible than tooth loss, emphysema and liver cancer is aging, so please live in the moment!

7. If the wealth in the world is distributed to our citizens equally, each of us can get thousands of dollars, but each person in African countries can only get dozens of cents. But you don't have to feel guilty because we are far away from them.

If you don't like your house, you can buy a new one. If you don't like your city, you can move to another city; If you don't like your country, you can even immigrate.

9. Money is the root of all evil, but if you have no money, the whole society will despise you.

10, love is like an apple in a grocery store, you can't find it without flaws. Everyone is not perfect, especially yourself.

1 1. We are all small members of the vast universe, but we still meet the most self-righteous creature in the universe, namely human beings.

12, almost everyone in the world watches TV, but no TV series presents real life. If you spend 30% of your time watching TV plays every day, you will find yourself increasingly disappointed in the world.

13. Tall people only date tall people, so if you are short, don't bother to look up.

14, you are beautiful, people will envy you, because everyone thinks that beautiful people have a perfect life, so no one will sympathize with your misfortune, you can only live alone.

If you are ugly, people will like you because you are uglier than them. But people won't love you and stay with you just because you are uglier than them, so you are doomed to be lonely all your life.

Toxic chicken soup joke funny character talk about 2020

1. I heard a man answer the phone on the subway in the morning: mm-hmm, love you, love you the most, mm-hmm, don't love her, don't love her! Love you, love you, she is not as important as you! Pause: By the way, don't forget to change her cat litter. 2. Every time I accidentally drop melon seeds, I feel that there is nothing in life that I can't let go.

Titanic told me that I would rather eat instant noodles at home than spend that spare money on romance and cruises.

Don't let life exhaust your patience and yearning. You also have poems and faraway places, sparerib soup, barbecue and nang, shrimp and crab, hot pot and mala Tang, roast duck and fat sheep, coffee and caramel, biscuits and milk sticks, fried chicken and miso soup, durian crisp and shrimp dumpling king, almond tofu and lollipop, pepper chicken and spicy duck sausage.

Although you are ugly, the world can't live without you, because no one can set off the beauty of the world without you.

6. There are only two kinds of mathematical proof questions: one is "I can prove it even if I wipe it" and the other is "I can prove it even if I wipe it".

7. Reminder is the wind and rain that I have been wandering all my life. There are a few wisps of wind and rain, all of which have my feelings of dying with flowers.

8. Once so beautiful, now so down and out.

9. Be optimistic about the future and be philosophical about people's hearts.

10. I get goose bumps when I think of your sweet words.

1 1. They were all pulled out before they could participate.

12. (You said your family was poor. You said you were standing in the wind and rain with PHS.

13. Let your personality shine on your forehead.

14. If a man doesn't help you put on a wedding dress, you can give him a cassock.

15. You can sing in the toilet when you are in a bad mood.

16. I can't even say such a big word when I see you.

17. The happiest thing in the world is to watch you grow old while I am still young.

18. Today, I finally got up the courage to confess to the male god, but the male god looked at me and said: I have a female basin friend, don't believe it! I have a bad feeling in my heart. The male god pointed his mobile phone at me. I am ecstatic to see my appearance printed on the black screen of my mobile phone! I saw the male god looking at the mobile phone and quickly said: Sorry, I forgot to turn it on!

19. In my teens, some people took off their bills, others took off their poverty, but I took off the reins and ran like a husky on the stupid road.

There are about 300 million students in our country, assuming that each student takes an average of 5 subjects. There are two volumes in each subject, twice a year, and there are six billion volumes, about four billion meters, which can circle the earth ten times. One tree can make about 1500 sheets of paper, and 6 billion is equivalent to 4 million trees, which can be planted all over Beijing. For the sake of low carbon and environmental protection, it is necessary to refuse the exam. Please remember: no business, no killing!

2 1. I suspect my husband had an affair yesterday. He called the girl's name in his dream and called her a foreign name, Angela. It sounds like a fox! Husband told her to go to the middle road, there is no middle road here. I asked many sisters, but I have never heard of them. It seems that I am green. . . I want revenge!

22. In this world, reading several novels is sad, which makes me not believe in love.

Only when there is a long queue at the railway station can we really realize that we are descendants of the dragon.

24. People who fall into adversity may still survive, but I never have a loving home.

25. The so-called growth means forcing a person to become strong.

Seeing the new pearl, I have an impulse to die with TV.

27. I can resist anything except money and beautiful women.

28. If I could have another June day, would someone accompany me to enjoy playing games?

29. The top of the head is as white as silver, and there is nothing in the scales. Eyes on the ass, only clothes and no one!

30. Girl, you are called a bitch, and you dare not even open a bottle of water in front of boys?

3 1. A bitch is a bitch. Even in an economic crisis, it can't be expensive.

32. Tomb-Sweeping Day, it is not easy for students to have a holiday these days. Even vacations should be moved by their ancestors.

33. The best poets in China are in mental hospitals.

34. If you fool around, you will get bored sooner or later.

35. I want to be a female hooligan in thought, a good girl in life, a tender girl in appearance and a transformer in psychology!

36. I want to make a download software called earmuffs. Because lightning is inaudible.

37. You celebrated Tanabata this year, and I drank my 7-up!

38. I want to study hard every time, and then I kneel under the pomegranate skirt of my computer phone!

39. If the sky is affectionate, you will die young, live a big life and die under the flowers.

40. Besides teeth, there is love.

4 1. Get out, get out, and don't forget to come back when my anger subsides.

42. If only your parents had spent ten minutes walking.

Come on, let me give you a piece of your favorite swan meat.