When I am with the opposite sex of the same age, I get nervous easily and I don't know what to say when I speak. What should I do?

1, the elimination of shyness

The most important thing for shy people is the lack of communication practice and successful communication feelings. They need to strengthen communication practice training, make friends and eliminate the weakness of shyness in practice. You can use self-suggestion or imitate the behavior of those calm and sociable people with your heart.

2, the elimination of inferiority complex

People with low self-esteem should learn to evaluate themselves correctly, formulate practical development goals according to their actual abilities and levels, narrow the distance between "true self" and "ideal self", and create successful emotional experiences for themselves. Break the shackles of strong self-awareness, but pay too much attention to your own shortcomings and shortcomings and what others think of you, and avoid negative hints. Express yourself appropriately, overcome the tendency of "just thinking and not doing", and once you are mature about a certain problem, you must dare to express your opinions.

3, eliminate the withdrawn psychology

To eliminate loneliness, we must change our arrogant, cold, sharp and narrow-minded personality, open our hearts, win the understanding of others with frank and sincere feelings, and thus gain friendship.

4. Eliminate suspicion

To do this, we must abandon prejudice, treat people sincerely, treat people kindly, exchange feelings frankly, cultivate a calm attitude towards others, and correct our distorted judgment in communication.

5, eliminate jealousy

This requires strengthening positive self-suggestion, keeping in mind the concept of "modesty makes people progress", abandoning selfish ideology and asking friends to help them eliminate jealousy. 6. Eliminate social terror.

We can temporarily divert attention from external stimuli that cause social fear, gradually adjust inner imbalance, gradually eliminate fear, enhance self-confidence with encouragement and positive self-suggestion, and constantly strengthen and consolidate. You can also turn to a psychologist, use behavioral therapy to eliminate the fear of communication, learn social skills, apply them in practice, and gradually gain a successful experience.

When communicating with people, it is also very important to learn to listen, that is, when others are talking, listen attentively, observe his mood and feelings, understand his mood and feelings, understand his true meaning, and at the same time feedback your concern, understanding and attitude to each other in time through eyes and body language, so as to achieve the purpose of communication.

Ways to overcome timidity in conversation 1. Get to know each other and improve your self-confidence.

Speaking timidly is essentially caused by overestimating the other party. Overestimate each other and evaluate their relationship pessimistically, thus underestimating themselves, resulting in a sense of distance and admiration. At this time, it is natural to be humble and timid. We should strengthen our understanding of each other, not overestimate each other, let alone deify each other, but return them to their true colors and treat them as ordinary people. At the same time, all speakers are equal, and the purpose of speaking is to talk about democracy. Don't artificially pull the relationship between the two sides apart. Is it cowardly to know yourself correctly, position yourself correctly and improve your self-confidence? There was a young teacher who was timid by nature and was often timid in front of leaders and respected old teachers. If he can treat his colleagues and colleagues equally, this cowardly phenomenon will be completely eliminated.

Ways to overcome timidity in conversation 2. Express desire and pay attention to the effect of expression.

Sometimes we are timid, not because we underestimate ourselves, but because we have a strong desire to express ourselves. At the beginning of your speech, you should concentrate on making a blockbuster and overwhelming others: when you find that others are eloquent and have unique opinions, you feel psychologically lost and frustrated, and your mood plummets. In this regard, we need to cultivate a simple and natural speaking style and express ourselves satisfactorily. Don't expect too much. This mentality is stable, and there is no way to talk about cowardice. A teacher attended a teaching and research meeting in the province. He talked about it in Kan Kan and took his time. Why is a young man so sophisticated? The key is that his mentality is stable and normal, and he has no high expectations.

Ways to overcome timidity in conversation 3. Sense of responsibility, eliminate retreat.

In the face of others' excellent performance, what should I do if there is cowardice? Beating a retreat will inevitably lead to embarrassment, and it will also bring a vicious circle to future speeches. At this time, we should strengthen our sense of responsibility, take expressing our opinions as our own responsibility, persevere, never back down, and our cowardice will be overcome. People often take a breath, hold it down, and their anger will be fast, and cowardice will be overcome automatically. A classmate failed in the literary essay contest in Sun Shan. He was dominated by a sense of cowardice in front of those serious judges, but he felt that he should express his opinions and help the judges make scientific judgments. Vilti, once you stand down, your words will flow smoothly and your meaning will be accurately expressed.

Ways to overcome timidity in conversation 4. Psychological adjustment from a rational perspective.

Physiology and psychology interact. Psychological changes will cause corresponding physiological changes; Similarly, physiological adjustment will also have an impact on psychology. When cowardice appears in speech, it is often involuntary and difficult to control. Through some physiological adjustment measures, good results can often be achieved, such as deep breathing, rubbing hands, stretching limbs, walking and washing. , can eliminate and alleviate the timid and nervous psychology. When a young man speaks timidly in public, he uses unique ways such as gargling and wringing his skin to relieve and transfer his timidity, and the effect is also remarkable. I once faced several experts, and my mouth trembled when I spoke. He took a few sips of water, twisted a few times, and suddenly his cowardice disappeared.

Ways to overcome timidity in conversation 5. Suggest psychological relaxation.

Correcting psychological problems with psychological methods is the most direct and effective method. Psychological cowardice is caused by psychological exaggerated feelings, and psychological feelings must be restored. To achieve this requirement, we need to adopt psychological suggestion, have an objective and correct understanding of each other, and make an accurate and fair evaluation of ourselves, so as to stay awake and build up confidence. For example, when others show advantages that we can't achieve, we can make such a hint: this is his advantage, and I also have advantages that he can't compare with. A girl envies a young man who is good at talking and making friends, but she hints that I can analyze good speeches. Can he compare with me? As a result, I was no longer timid in front of the young man and saved my heart.