A collection of short sentences about love jokes

1. Collection of funny love sentences

Humorous and funny sentences about love

1. Five hundred years ago, you were the long-term employee of our family. That day in my I fell in love with you when I peeked at you chopping wood from the window. Don’t blame me for not telling you at the time! Because there were no short messages back then!

2 When the wife goes out, she must follow her, she must obey her orders, and when she is wrong, she must blindly obey; she must wait for her to put on makeup, remember her birthday, she must be willing to spend money, and she must endure beatings and scoldings.

3 Dear user, hello, this is a network test. If there is no signal on your mobile phone, please drop your mobile phone on the ground as hard as you can until there is a signal. Thank you for your cooperation and goodbye

4. A man raising a woman outside is called "hidden beauty in a golden house". A woman raising a man outside is called "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon".

5. An unmarried woman sighed: Why do all good men become other people’s husbands? Someone reminded her: Wives train good husbands by themselves, and no man can be self-taught.

6. Stupid man, stupid woman = marriage; stupid man, smart woman = divorce; smart man, stupid woman = extramarital affair; smart man, smart woman = romantic love; us?

7. You are the sun in the sky, and I am the mountain on the earth; you are the moon in the sky, and I am the ocean on the earth; you are the crow flying in the sky, and I am the earthly dog ??chasing after you. Chase.

8. A first-class man has a home outside his home; a second-class man has flowers outside his home; a third-class man looks for a home among flowers; a fourth-class man has his family home from work; a fifth-class man has his wife not at home; a sixth-class man No wife, no home.

9 One kiss gives you roses m. Two kisses give you my home mm. Three kisses go to Java for honeymoon mmm. I am a big fool for love. I will never change my love for you! ! ! mmm

10. You, you, you little goblin, you have caused me to be poisoned by your love but you still refuse to give me the antidote! Little bad guy! oh! I'm dying! Help me! The solution is simple: give me your love!

11. You are handsome, you are handsome, you are the most handsome in the world. You have a nest of cabbage on your head, a sack on your body, and a piece of kelp around your waist. You think you are the Invincible of the East, but in fact you are the second declining god. generation.

12. The rooster and the hen are husband and wife, and they are busy hatching chicks all day long. The chick has a mental problem and does not eat, drink or rest. The rooster and hen are anxious and hide aside to watch the chicks. They are stupid. The chick didn't pay attention and was secretly looking at the phone.

13. Sister, I love you just like a mouse loves rice. I miss you every time I hear it. I fall in love with you at first sight. I pursue you without saying a word. I come to you again and again. I will definitely I want to chase you...

14. Being single is understanding, being in love is a mistake, breaking up is awareness, getting married is a mistake, divorce is awakening, remarriage is stubbornness, without a lover, you are a waste, and with too many lovers, you are an animal.

15. Baby, baby, I love you, just like a mouse loves rice. You are a phoenix flying in the sky, and I am a jackal chasing you on the ground. I will neither beat you nor scold you. I will use Emotions torture you.

16 Buddha said: It takes five hundred times of looking back at the past life in exchange for passing by in this life. If it is true, I would trade ten thousand times to meet you and be able to tell you: "I really want to love you." 2. Classic sentences about love words and jokes

1. If you cry, it will always be my face that is wet; if you are sad, it will always be my heart that is crying.

2. What if I lose you but win the world? 3. 30 years later, if there is still the word "persistence" in the world, I hope it belongs to me. 30 years later, if there is still the word "moving" in the world, I hope it belongs to you.

4. Except for rejecting the condition that you say "I love you", I can promise you all the promises. 5. When you are by my side, you are everything. When you are not by my side, you are everything.

6. It only took one second to fall in love with you, but it took my whole life to forget you.

7. When missing becomes a habit, I think it is love. 8. I can’t die for you. This is not because I don’t love you enough, but because after I die, No one will ever love you like I do again.

9. With you, I don’t need to be happy anymore, because you are my happiness. -10. I don’t know what will happen in the future, but I know that at this moment, I love you.

Jokes: 11. "You will regret the lack of books when you have used them", and classmates said "the money will not be enough at the end of the month"... 36. God, it's too blue! The sea is too salty! Life is so difficult! Work is so boring! I am destined to be with you! Miss you, sleepless! It’s too far to see you!

44. The beauty of knowledge lies in making people confused; the beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; the beauty of women lies in being so stupid that they have no regrets; the beauty of men lies in telling lies so that they can see ghosts in daylight.

54. Hold the child’s hand and drag the child away. If the son says not to leave, fine, close the door and let the dogs out! 1. When you hold your hand, you will know that your son is ugly, and your face will burst into tears. If you don’t leave, I will leave.

2. Journey to the West tells us: All monsters with a backing were picked up, and all monsters without a backing were beaten to death with a stick.

4. I like you so much, you will die if you like me.

5. I am not RMB, how can I make everyone like me? !

6. Apart from teeth, there is also love that makes people unable to extricate themselves.

7. When life viciously turned everything into black humor, I turned myself into a highly educated gangster.

9. Little girls all want to find a white horse in their dreams. When they open their eyes, they find that the world is full of gray donkeys. After being heartbroken, they can only choose one of the donkeys. Strong and strong, such a donkey is named: Economical Male.

10. I want to cry, I want to make trouble, stay up all night, holding a bottle of sleeping pills in my hand, and a small rope to hang myself. No matter how ugly you are, you still have to fall in love and the world is filled with love.

11. Our goal: focus on money and make big profits.

12. I am a passerby that you turn around and forget about. Why should I accompany you to the end of the world in wasting your time?

13. If you don’t have medical insurance or life insurance, don’t act bravely after dark...

14. Bus jogging is a sport and fitness program that includes Sanda, yoga, judo, balance beam and other sports. An all-in-one comprehensive movement.

17. Cutting wires with a kitchen knife in hand, sparks and lightning along the way.

22. Many people say that marriage is the tomb of love, but it is better for love to be buried in peace than to die on the streets.

24. It is said that people have only two choices, busy dying or busy living. I think I have a third choice: busy waiting to die. 28. If you are destined not to give me the response I expect, then keep at a safe distance.

29. Please don’t regard my tolerance of you as your shameless capital.

30. It is virtue for a woman to have no talent. I must be too wicked.

31. Zhuge Liang had never led an army before he left the mountain. Why do you want me to have work experience? 3. Humorous jokes about love

It is recommended that you download the Rubao client on your mobile phone, or follow Rubao Duanzi on WeChat (WeChat ID: roboo-dz) to gain happiness 24 hours a day.

Just now, before 7 o'clock in the morning, a couple was chatting on line 10. The woman suddenly took out the man's mobile phone and started checking WeChat. During this period, she hit, scolded and kicked the man from time to time. Then the woman said: Why hasn’t your wife added me on WeChat yet? Man: She doesn’t dare to join people she doesn’t know...Does your family know that you are such a dick outside as a mistress?

Last night, two colleagues and I went to the public bathroom to take a shower. While he was washing his hair and couldn’t open his eyes, I walked up behind him with conditioner and squeezed his ass hard, white. The lotion sprayed all over his butt, and he screamed like a pig: "Fuck, (muffler) what are you doing?" I immediately put the conditioner away, holding my penis in my hand and standing at him with a confused expression. Wait for him to look back.

Last night, I had sex with a fat girl after drinking. When I woke up in the morning, I wrote my phone number on a note and handed it to her and said, "If you still want to see me in the future, just call this number." "Wow, you're so nice!" She said happily, "Everyone else does. You don’t want to give me your phone number.” I said, “This is not my phone number, it’s from the weight loss center.” 4. A collection of funny love sentences

Five hundred years ago, You are a long-term worker in our family. I fell in love with you that day when I peeked at you chopping wood from the window. Don’t blame me for not telling you at that time! Because there were no short messages back then! 2 You must follow your wife when she goes out, obey your wife's orders, blindly follow your wife when she is wrong; you must wait for your wife to put on makeup, remember your wife's birthday, be willing to spend money, and tolerate your wife's beatings and scoldings.

3 Dear user, hello, this is a network test. If there is no signal on your mobile phone, please throw your mobile phone on the ground as hard as you can until there is a signal. Thank you for your cooperation. Goodbye. 4. Men are here Raising a woman outside is called "hidden beauty in a golden house". A woman raising a man outside is called "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon".

5. An unmarried woman sighed: Why do all good men become other people’s husbands? Someone reminded her: Wives train good husbands by themselves, and no man can be self-taught. 6. Stupid man, stupid woman = marriage; stupid man, smart woman = divorce; smart man, stupid woman = extramarital affair; smart man, smart woman = romantic love; us? 7. You are the sun in the sky, and I am the mountains on the earth; you are the moon in the sky, and I am the ocean on the earth; you are the crow flying in the sky, and I am the earth dog chasing and chasing.

8. A first-class man has a home outside his home; a second-class man has flowers outside his home; a third-class man looks for a home among flowers; a fourth-class man has his family home from work; a fifth-class man has his wife not at home; a sixth-class man No wife, no home. 9 One kiss gives you roses m. Two kisses give you my home mm. Three kisses take me to Java for my honeymoon mmm. I am a big fool for love. I will never change my mind if I love you! ! ! mmm 10. You, you, you little goblin, made me fall into your love poison but you still refused to give me the antidote! Little bad guy! oh! I'm dying! Help me! The solution is simple: give me your love! 11. You are handsome, you are handsome, you are the most handsome in the world. You have a nest of cabbage on your head, a sack on your body, and a piece of kelp around your waist. You think you are the Invincible of the East, but in fact you are the second generation of the declining gods.

12. The rooster and the hen are husband and wife, and they are busy hatching chicks all day long. The chick has a mental problem and does not eat, drink or rest. The rooster and hen are anxious and hide aside to watch the chicks. They are stupid. The chick didn't pay attention and was secretly looking at the phone. 13. I love you, sister, just like a mouse loves rice. I miss you every time I hear it. I fall in love with you at first sight. I chase you without saying a word. I come to you again and again. I must chase you... 14 , Being single is understanding, falling in love is a mistake, breaking up is enlightenment, getting married is a mistake, divorce is awakening, remarriage is stubbornness, not having a lover is a waste, having too many lovers is an animal.

15. Baby, baby, I love you, just like a mouse loves rice. You are a phoenix flying in the sky, and I am a jackal chasing you on the ground. I will neither beat you nor scold you. I will use Emotions torture you. 16 Buddha said: Looking back five hundred times in the past life is the only exchange for passing by in this life.

If it is true, I would trade ten thousand times to meet you and be able to tell you: "I really want to love you."

5. Collection of funny love sentences

1. Five hundred years ago, you were a long-term worker in our family. That day when I peeked at you chopping wood from the window, I fell in love with you. Don’t blame me. I didn’t tell you at the time! Because there were no short messages back then!

2 When the wife goes out, she must follow her, she must obey her orders, and when she is wrong, she must blindly obey; she must wait for her to put on makeup, remember her birthday, she must be willing to spend money, and she must endure beatings and scoldings.

3 Dear user, hello, this is a network test. If there is no signal on your mobile phone, please drop your mobile phone on the ground as hard as you can until there is a signal. Thank you for your cooperation and goodbye

4. A man raising a woman outside is called "hidden beauty in a golden house". A woman raising a man outside is called "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon".

5. An unmarried woman sighed: Why do all good men become other people’s husbands? Someone reminded her: Wives train good husbands by themselves, and no man can be self-taught. 6. Hilarious text messages about love jokes

One night I wanted to buy snacks, but my mom stopped me, so she asked me: "Aren't you going to lose weight?"

I said: "Hi... Anyway, I I have a boyfriend, someone wants me..."

Then my mother looked at me for a long time and said something very inspiring: "Don't you want to change?"

A first-grade thief, The thief in the second grade, the brother in the third grade dances ballet, the handsome guy in the fourth grade is not pursued, the love letters in the fifth grade are all over the sky, the homework in the sixth grade is a lot, the test papers in the seventh grade are laid out on the carpet, and the lovers in the eighth grade are in pairs , the tuition for ninth grade is fucking expensive.

Chatting with my wife after dinner today! When she got excited, she laughed and spitted all over my face! I subconsciously wiped it with my hands...but my wife was furious: How dare you dislike me! I hurriedly explained: No, my wife, you didn't spray it evenly... I applied it with my hands.

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