Humorous jokes that make your girlfriend happy.

1, my wife washes clothes at night, and I stand by and talk to her! The wife pointed to the underwear and said, look, it's all broken! I said: throw it away and buy a new one from you tomorrow! The wife thought about it and said, well, look at the sponge inside. Take it out and keep it for washing dishes.

The bus suddenly braked, and I threw myself on the handsome guy in front. At the most embarrassing moment, my mouth was still on his side face. Looking at the handsome guy with an angry face, I smiled apologetically: "Sorry, the bus suddenly braked and I didn't stop for a while." "Dude, what do you mean?" Handsome guy grabbed my neck and roared, "Does bus braking have anything to do with you?" I haven't waited for a bus for three minutes, and you jumped on me five times! What car are you going to take? "

Xiaoming saw the thief stealing his aunt's wallet. He said tactfully, "Thank you, uncle, for helping my mother pick up my wallet." The thief returned his wallet with a red face, and people gave him a favorable look. Aunt was about to get off the bus when she grabbed Xiaoming and said, "Son, go home." Xiao Ming was anxious: "She is not my mother!" " "The passenger frowned:" I praised a few words, and the child was naughty again. "So Xiao Ming was dragged out of the car and sold to other provinces.

My sister's face is covered with acne, which is very serious. My mother took her to the doctor. After the doctor prescribed some medicine, he told her not to eat anything that got angry. Today my mother saw her eating potato chips while watching TV in the living room. She grabbed the potato chips angrily and said, "If you don't shut up, your face will be finished!" " "My sister immediately grabbed the potato chips and said coldly," Mom, it's shameless to eat vegetables. "

Every time my father introduces me to outsiders, he uses a modest word, that is, dog. One day, the old man was hot-headed and said to others, "This is my dog." Oh, my God. Did I send it on my cell phone?

6. A buddy drank too much at night and couldn't find a home late at night! So I stood in the community and shouted: Get up when you fall asleep! So I see many families with lights on. The buddy then shouted: open the window for everyone who gets up! Many residents inexplicably open the windows and stick their heads out to see something! The elder brothers continued to shout: Look whose child I am and take me back!