Before getting married, my mother called me to the room and said only one sentence: Don’t be too nice to your mother-in-law. Why?

The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has always been a subject of great learning, but as a woman, she is taught to be diligent at a very young age. When she gets married in the future, she should not be criticized for being lazy and indifferent. But can a woman be valued if she works hard all her life? This may not be the case, and it may be easier for someone to bully you. My friend Xiao Yuan has been telling me recently that her grandmother complained that the family did not provide for her in old age, but she was clearly "cruel" in the first place.

01. One is willing to fight and the other is willing to suffer

Let’s call Xiao Yuan’s mother Aunt Liu for the time being. Her grandmother’s surname is Wang. Grandma Wang has always been a strong and unreasonable woman. Her husband died in an accident when she was young, and she raised three children single-handedly. In the past, widows like this were bullied. This is why Grandma Wang has such a character. Aunt Liu has had a bad temper since she was a child. When she got married, her family told her to serve her husband and mother-in-law well and not to embarrass her mother-in-law.

Grandma Wang gave the young couple a show of strength when they first started. First: Aunt Liu must do all the work at home, and no one else can help. Second: All the income of the two people must be kept by themselves, and the family expenses can be met by themselves. Third: You must be in charge of all matters at home, and you cannot make decisions on your own.

Aunt Liu has no objection to these overbearing terms. Normally, Uncle Wang would be scolded by Grandma Wang if he wanted to help with housework. The key is that Aunt Liu was not allowed to rest when she gave birth to Xiao Yuan. Not only did she not have confinement, she even had to serve the two mothers, holding the baby in one hand and cooking and washing dishes with the other.

02. The explosion after infinite tolerance

Aunt Liu has worked hard and without complaint for 16 years. Instead of being married, she is clearly working as a free nanny. When outsiders see this wonderful daughter-in-law, they will all praise her: "Aunt Wang, you are so lucky to have such a wonderful daughter-in-law to come back and serve you!". And Aunt Wang was very disdainful: "This is her duty. She must serve me when she marries into my family! Is it possible that the person who got it with money from the Wang family still has to serve her?" Aunt Liu listened to these words for a long time. I was unhappy, but I didn’t dare to contradict my mother-in-law.

Aunt Liu's accident happened when Xiao Yuan was in her second year of high school. She was diagnosed with uterine cancer. Fortunately, it was in the early stages. It could be cured, but the uterus would need to be removed, and the surgery would cost money. She asked Grandma Wang for money for medical treatment but was told that she had no money. Grandma Wang said: "The money is mine if you give it to me. It would be better to marry my son if I give you this broken medicine pot!".

Uncle Wang did not dare to force Grandma Wang to take out the money, but he felt that it was very unkind for his mother to do so. Afterwards, Aunt Liu borrowed money from her brother to cure her illness, and threatened Uncle Wang with a divorce if he did not separate the family from Grandma Wang.

03. Being nice to your mother-in-law is not about obeying her words

After that, Xiaoyuan’s family moved to the city. As Grandma Wang gets older, she also worries about her future pension. So she often brought local specialties to please Aunt Liu. But Aunt Liu has long been disappointed with Grandma Wang. She has been ignoring her and saying harsh words: "There is no need to bring these things. If you want to live a better life in your later years, don't do anything too extreme." With the opening scene, Grandma Wang had no choice but to go to Xiao Yuan to complain.

The daughter-in-law is not the nanny of her mother-in-law. She should take care of her, but she cannot be left to her own devices. And she should have shown such ferocity at the early stage of this incident, otherwise the mother-in-law would feel that her daughter-in-law was easy to bully and would keep stepping on her. In fact, there is another important role in this matter: Uncle Wang. Because he grew up under the halo of his mother, he is timid and afraid of taking responsibility. He is a complete wallflower and obeys whoever he thinks is more powerful. . This is one of the reasons why the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is so bad, so girls should not fight with their mother-in-law all the time, but should take good care of their husbands.