High score collection of cold jokes

Xiao Huamei: "Mom, I'm not feeling well today. Can I not go to school? "

Big plum: "What's the matter?"

Xiao Huamei: "I feel so sore all over, really."

A man was starving in the desert when he found the magic lamp.

Magic lamp: "I can only realize your one wish." Hurry up, I'm in a hurry. "

Man: "I want a wife ..."

The magic lamp immediately conjured up a beautiful woman, and then said disdainfully, "I'm starving and I'm greedy for beauty!" " Pathetic! "say that finish

It disappeared.

Man: "... cake."

The camera and the mirror mm fell in love, and the mirror mm said:

"I am so sad that I have been photographed by others all my life, but I don't know what I look like."

The camera said, "Never mind, why don't I just take a picture of you?"

When the photos are developed, ...

…… ……

Mirror MM: "5555 ~ ~ Why is it still you in the photo ..." The fat man made a girlfriend and broke up in less than a week. When a friend asked why, the fat man said:

"She said ... look at me for a long time, I feel so tired ..."

Little penguins go to play with polar bears!

Three years later, I walked to the equator and remembered that the house was open.

It was three years before he went home and closed the door.

Six years later, I went to the North Pole.

The child who knocked on the polar bear said, "Polar bear, I'm coming to play with you!" " "

As soon as the polar bear opened the door, he took a look at the penguin and said, "I don't want to play!" Then turn off the child! "

Penguins are home! ! !

Said three bats went to a bar to drink.

The first one said, "Give me a glass of blood." The other two bats laughed at him for his bad taste, old-fashioned.

The second said, "Give me a glass of lemon-flavored blood." The rest of the bats laughed at him for being old-fashioned.

At this time, the third bat came to the bar and said smartly, "Give me a cup of boiled water."

There is a box of eggs on the refrigerator.

One egg said to another, "Look, that egg is covered with mildew."

"Egg" said: "Put pi! Laozi is kiwi! "