A joke by Mr. Guo Degang

Giving Wife and Son Guo Degang/Yu Qian

Guo: Let me introduce you to the famous cross talk actor Yu Qian

Yu: I dare not

Guo: Okay

Yu: Really

Guo: It’s good anywhere, on stage, good, off stage, human nature, bah---it’s really good

Yu: Is this okay?

Guo: What's wrong?

Yu: You're all spitting on this

Guo: No, just now A dragonfly flew in - do you believe it?

Yu: A dragonfly flew in? A plane flying in will hit you and kill you

Guo: Why are you so funny with him? The two brothers have a good friendship

Yu: We have a friendship

Guo: In this backstage, including the young and old, we have the best relationship

Yu: Yes

Guo: Really

Yu: Are we friends?

Guo: We are both brothers and good friends

< p>Yu: We are still good friends, yes

Guo: With others, we may meet at the theater on Saturdays and Sundays, but with him, we see each other three or four times a week

Yu: Hey , Lao Demei

Guo: He said on the phone: Let’s go have a drink - can you not go?

Yu: Are you chatting?

Guo: Went with him, Just sit there and drink, and you'll get a lot. To be honest, one drink is enough.

Yu: I don’t drink much

Guo: Okay! good! !

Yu: Are you okay after drinking too much?

Guo: I would rather learn to get drunk than learn to play chess.

Yu: How do you say this?

Guo: When you drink, you persuade your opponent to drink more. When you play chess, you hold it in and win the opponent, right?

Yu: You have to be careful

Guo: Xinxin

Yu: Yes

Guo: Well, every time I drink, basically I have to drink too much. He feeds himself

Yu: Are you an honest person?

Guo: Come on. . Have a drink. . Come. . Drink one and get rid of this

Yu: Sincerity

Guo: This spring, the fun is even greater. The two of us went out to drink. There was a sheep and scorpion beside the North Fourth Ring Road, and they all said that was great. Let’s go, drink. I drank too much for a while. I’m done. Can you tell me?

Yu: It’s okay

Guo: The wine leaked

Yu : What is called leaking wine

Guo: After drinking, he has to go out for a while

Yu: That's called kidney transplant

Guo: The restrooms are full, go up It was dark outside, there was heavy snow outside, and no one was around. He went out and stood on the grass, zipped up his jacket, and wah - he finished urinating, and Zila (zipping sound) came back. When I came back, I said: It's cold outside, and my legs are so squirming -

Yu: That's outrageous

Guo: Of course I drank too much

Yu: Huh?

Guo: He wanted to see me off, so I agreed and drove me there. If I hadn't drunk too much, would I dare to let him send me away?

Yu: You drank a lot.

Guo: I was sitting here while he drove the car. After driving 70 meters, I wondered, why don’t my headlights come on? When I got out of the car, I saw that the cover of the machine was open.

Yu: Hey, that one is fully blocked

Guo: I also advised him that it dissipates heat quickly

Yu: Does it dissipate heat that well?

Guo: How are you two? Why do we say that the two brothers are good friends? Friendship between people is very important.

Yu: Yes!

Guo: Today’s audience, many of them are friends, some are lovers, boyfriends and girlfriends, some are ordinary friends, some are close friends

Let’s take You become a friend.

Yu: Are we all friends?

Guo: Don’t look at us standing on the stage, we have the same status as you. No matter who is higher or lower, no. Entering this room, no matter you are a big entrepreneur, a banker, a big boss, a big painter, a poet, a martial artist, a queen from any African country, or a chief of any tribe

Yu: I don’t want to be a good person. Come here

Guo: It doesn’t matter where you are from, we are all equal here.

Yu: Yes

Guo: It’s the same on stage. They say we are not famous actors, we are not artists, we are not actors or actresses, we are just ordinary actors. Even if we are famous actors, we should be equal to you.

Yu: That is

Guo: Who is not higher, who is not lower?

Yu: food, clothing, parents

Guo: people You can live without relatives, but you cannot live without friends

Yu: You are right

Guo: Of course, friends are different from friends.

Yu: Is there any difference?

Guo: Some friends are fighting each other and taking advantage of each other

Yu: That’s not good

Guo: Others are just friends, eating and drinking. All is fine, just say "go drink", they all become

Yu: fair-weather friends

Guo: When something happens, something happens to Yu Qian, Yu Qian beats someone to death, they all run away< /p>

Yu: What’s wrong with me, I’ll beat him to death

Guo: That’s what I mean. You can’t make this friend

Yu: If something goes wrong, you’ll be gone without him

Guo: As far as the past is concerned, making friends is a standard.

Yu: Is this still a standard?

Guo: Hey, the friendship between the noble and the low is established, and the friendship is seen in life and death. The wife does not avoid him when passing through the house, so there must be a friendship of entrusting his wife and offering his son

To: You are still doing the same thing

Guo: This is knowledge

Yu: How do you say it

Guo: Let me talk to you about this.

Yu: Please tell me

Guo: I used to be engaged in science, and I specialize in this research

Yu: Your scientific research project is still getting old< /p>

Guo: Science is very rigorous, you know?

Yu: Ah, please talk about this again

Guo: The friendship between one noble and one humble< /p>

Yu: How do you say this?

Guo: There are two sentences: Birds follow Luan and Phoenix to soar far away, and people are accompanied by virtuous and good people.

Yu: What's going on?

Guo: Birds follow Luanfeng, I am just a little sparrow, just as big as that

Yu: little bird

Guo: You are different

Yu: I am

Guo: You are a big bird, Luan Feng

Yu: Phoenix

Guo: Big Phoenix. For example, this ordinary bird has to go to the west to worship Tathagata Buddha. If I go there, I will be in big trouble because my wings are spread so wide that they flutter. .

Yu: Qi Fan

Guo: You are different. The wings of the big phoenix are opened. After three or five checks, you are here. You are so relaxed that you can go to the west.

Yu: I just die more easily

Guo: What if I want to go? I will just hold a quill from your tail and use your strength to follow you. Went

Yu: Followed

Guo: (looking behind Yu Qian) I didn’t bring it with me today

Yu: No. Isn’t this a metaphor?

Guo: Birds follow the phoenix and fly far away, and people are proud of themselves when accompanied by virtuous people. People should be with virtuous people again

Yu: Be with good people

Guo: Why am I with you.

Yu: This is?

Guo: You are a virtuous person

Yu: You are too polite

Guo: You are a good wife and mother

Yu: Where are you from? She is a good wife and mother

Guo: This is the most basic thing, so we have the friendship between one noble and one lowly.

Oops, one is noble and the other is cheap, let’s give an example

Yu: You said

Guo: Take me for example, I’m not talking about cross talk Guo Degang

Yu: Who are you?

Guo: I am a laid-off worker

Yu: No job

Guo: The conditions at home are very difficult, and the house we live in is also very difficult, full of holes , it’s going to cost me my life if it rains

Yu: How

Guo: It’s light rain outside, moderate rain inside the house, moderate rain outside, heavy rain inside the house, heavy rain outside, heavy rain inside the house , sometimes it rains too much, and the whole family goes to the Third Ring Road to take shelter from the rain

Yu: I’ve never heard of anyone taking shelter outside from the rain

Guo: To eat There was no meal,

Yu: Is it over if I don’t have money?

Guo: My father’s leg was hit by a car, the driver ran away, and the old man has been bedridden all year round

Yu: Lying on the bed

Guo: My wife has been sick all year round and cannot go to work. My children are waiting to go to school and have no money to pay tuition. I am laid off again and my family has nothing to do.

Yu: It’s so miserable

Guo: It’s snowing heavily in the twelfth lunar month of winter, and the whole family is stuck in the house unable to get out. I am the only one with more than one body, and they are all wrapped up in blankets

Yu: Okay

Guo: I counted 12 briquettes on the ground, but they are not enough

Yu: Not enough to burn

Guo: Old and young, I have to go out and run.

Yu: Go make money.

Guo: It’s such a weather outside, I wear very little. He is wearing a plastic fur coat

Yu: Does anyone use plastic as a fur coat?

Guo: There are 1 taels of cotton on the cuffs

Yu: Still A bit cotton

Guo: Wearing this pair of shorts, touching above the knees, and wearing a pair of plastic sandals

Yu: What day do you wear these?

Guo: Carrying a bag , clutching two copies of the Beijing Evening News from 1981

Yu: Huh?

Guo: Open the door, wow - the wind blows on your face like a knife

Yu: It's cold

Guo: It's in the rain The snow fell on the ground and said it was wet or not, but it was slippery. I walked out against the wind, holding a newspaper in my hand: Beijing Evening News in 1981, look at the news, the Gang of Four was crushed.

Yu: What news is this?

Guo: Do ??you want anything?

Yu: No

Guo: Walk along the river, against the wind. There is a lot of traffic on the Second Ring Road. Looking back at the lights of thousands of houses, there is no place in this world for me. I have a desire to die. When I think about the elderly and children at home, I can’t even die when I sell my newspaper to buy food for them. Go forward. Walking and walking, I came to Yuda versus Taiqian.

Yu: Met me

Guo: Driving a car. What a great car, the only one in Asia.

Yu: Really?

Guo: You are on. You are the big boss of a multinational group

Yu: You are rich

Guo: Driving this car far away, tutu tutu. . . . .

Yu: Here comes the one or three bungalows

Guo: Bigger than that one

Yu: The big one is also three bungalows

Guo: It's a very good car, a black business car, with a driver sitting in the front seat.

Yu: Yes

Guo: You look very distinguished sitting in the back seat. Your steering wheel is different from others

Yu: What’s wrong?

Guo: Our steering wheels are all round and have a rubber cover. You are made of sterling silver

Yu: Ouch

Guo: It’s long, with both ends bent down, clenched, and protruding. . . .

Yu: It’s still a three-wheeled machine

Guo: It’s a German machine.

Yu: Hi, that machine is also three-wheeled

< p>Guo: When you came to me, you saw me at a glance. Instruct the driver: Press the brakes

Yu: No brakes at all

Guo: As soon as the door opened, Yu Qian suddenly Jump out, and the driver is holding you behind. . .

Yu: This is the driver who is out walking the dog

Guo: No, you are wearing a big gold chain around your waist, it weighs 140 pounds

Yu: I'm shackles for myself

Guo: The driver is holding the shackles for you from behind. Oh, I can’t open my eyes when standing in front of me. This man is so jeweled

Yu: Yes

Guo: On the whole head, there are big gold rings on the ears, half One pound. There is a big silver ring in the middle of the nose, this bead and that bead on the mouth, and a gold one is inserted into the eyeball

Yu: Huh? Isn’t this bad?

Guo: Wearing this suit can cost you 30,000 to 50,000 yuan

Yu: It’s so expensive

Guo: Standing Come to me, look at me happily, hahahaha. . I dare not speak.

Yu: I’m scared.

Guo: The gap between rich and poor is too big. What kind of person am I? I am a person who cannot die even if I want to. Who is he? I was dumbfounded when he stood in front of me. In a daze, I saw that it was Yu Qian. I didn’t dare to speak.

Yu: I didn’t dare to recognize him.

Guo: Zhang Bu Open your mouth. You broke this embarrassing situation

Yu: What did I say

Guo: Father, me. .

Yu: Wait a minute

Guo: Hello, father

Yu: Wait. . . There's no such thing as that. In order to break this embarrassing situation, why don't I step down a generation? No.

Guo: When we were young, we played together and played house. You are young and I am a little older than you, so you call me father just because you are a bad person.

Yu: How can I be such a bad person?

Guo: Just say this

Yu: What do you mean

Guo: Father

Yu: Okay, stop barking , that’s all.

Guo: Do ??you still know me? I said forgive me for my blindness, who are you? You say: Oh, I am a son.

Yu: Hey, don’t go on. This is what I said when I was young

Guo: I’m afraid it won’t be clear

Yu: It’s clear< /p>

Guo: I recognized it was you, but I didn’t dare to admit it. I’m too old and my eyesight is dazzled, so I didn’t dare to admit it.

Yu: Isn’t it?

Guo: What’s wrong with you? Let's play together. Why are you down and out now? I shed tears. When I tell you about my own experience, you are also very sad, wow---

Yu: I cried

Guo: My pants got wet

p>

Yu: That’s urine

Guo: Tears like a spring

Yu: That’s not that much

Guo: Very sad. Don't worry about it. Will I make you suffer? He took out his check book from his arms. Everyone, who came out to use the check book? Yu Qian, took out his check book and took out a gold pen from his pants. Diamond. The sharp point, just this diamond, costs more than half a catty. Bring it over and write me a check, ha--(ha pen tip)

Yu: The gold pen will be useless for a while

Guo: (throwing the pen away) Ha--hey, How to write the second word?

Yu: I am illiterate

Guo: After I finished writing, I pulled out a bunch of keys. There was a big stamp in it. Tear it off: Here you go - < /p>

Yu: This is

Guo: Take it and see one million

Yu: Here is some money for you

Guo: Here I have one million, I can’t believe it

Yu: That’s

Guo: Holding this up, I was dumbfounded: Is this true? How could this be true?

Yu: I don’t believe it

Guo: I grabbed your hand, put it in my mouth, and said————

Yu: What to do?

Guo: Let me see if it is true.

Yu: Will you bite my hand to see if it is true?

Guo: (pretending to look at it with a finger) It’s true. You are also very happy: it’s good if it’s true. (Raise your hand and bend one finger to indicate that a piece is missing)

Yu: Hi, it’s really not that good

Guo: I burst into tears on the side of the road holding the check. The spring. Boss Yu opened the door and got in the car, then walked away in a hurry. . .

Yu: It’s still these three tricks

Guo: A puff of black smoke enveloped your German car. I raised my arms and shouted: Elder Sun, take away your magical powers.

Yu: I can’t even see the car

Guo: The friendship between one noble and the other is revealed

Yu: Oh, that’s it

Guo: Friendship is the result of life and death

Yu: What's going on?

Guo: We still have to compare us

Yu: Ah, let’s use a metaphor

Guo: Let’s talk about you, Yu Qian, but it’s not today. Yu Qian of cross talk

Yu: What is my identity?

Guo: You are a young man of eighteen or nineteen years old

Yu: Young

Guo: You have just gone to work, and you are full of energy and vitality. Enough, wherever you go, you will see, oh, you are full of energy. At home, after work in the evening, after dinner, I take a shower and change clothes, comb my hair, and put on my favorite outfit, white pants and a white belt

Yu: Spirit< /p>

Guo: Wear a white shirt on top. This was popular in those days

Yu: All in white

Guo: If you want to be pretty and filial, right?

p>

Yu: Yes, that’s what they said at that time

Guo: Big-pointed collar shirts, but later on, small collars were no longer available, and then big-pointed collars became popular. I sprayed four kilograms of perfume.

Yu: How about the kilogram?

Guo: It smells like eating sheep excrement

Yu: What kind of perfume are you wearing?

Guo: I am very happy to come out of the house. . Neighbors say hello: Hey, Qian'er is back, are you going out? Ah, it's okay, go out and act like a hooligan.

Yu: I'm going to act like a hooligan

Guo: I'm going to get a partner

Yu: I'm going to be a hooligan if I'm going to get a partner

Guo: Are young men and women having sex? When they go out, a girl comes over. She is not so good-looking. She is so beautiful. You stand behind and are happy: "Little girl, give me a smile for the uncle." When this girl turned around and saw you, she was a feudal person at that time. She looked at you with disdain and pulled back her four hairs. .

Yu: Live, just say bald and it’s over

Guo: You are proud of this, you are different, you have this idea, you are willing to marry a girl like this, you marry her Even if it’s performance art

Yu: What kind of performance art

Guo: I’m very happy: Come here. . come over. . The woman looked at you and said: Catch the gangster

Yu: Live

Guo: Run, change your steps and twist your waist, CHUA - fast

Yu: Got it Run

Guo: People are calling for arresting gangsters. I feel guilty for being a thief, so run away. This happened in Jinsong. In three minutes, you arrived at Shijingshan.

Yu: Running so fast?

Guo: Squatting in the middle of the road for a while, oops. . oops. . . (stick out tongue)

Yu: It’s hot at first sight. Does that make sense?

Guo: A firetruck came from Mentougou, a fire brigade car. Teng passed by you and was stunned. You were frightened and hid behind you. You are very angry. It is so shameless. Hey, I can't see it. If I touch it with my hand, where is my head?

Yu: Did you bump into it?

Guo: No, no, it was taken away

Yu: Okay, might as well hit it

Guo: Tong County is on fire and sent to Tong County Gone

Yu: My head

Guo: The head is gone when you touch it. You are a very individual person. You will be so angry that you will die

Yu: Is this a matter of anger?

Guo: I was lying in the middle of the road. After a while, the municipal road roller truck came over. It was so flat. . .

Yu: You have come to relieve your hatred

Guo: It’s so stressful. The sun is shining brightly for three days in a row. This person is gone and the world has evaporated. . Cars from out of town are wondering when they drive here: they are not allowed to turn right and go straight.

Yu: All dressed in vain

Guo: Big pointed collar.

Yu: I have to change my clothes when I go out tomorrow.

< /p>

Yu: Just say stop and it will be over

Guo: The carriage is draining

Yu: The carriage is still draining?

Guo: The horse is in trouble. Wow - it’s soaked

Yu: I soaked it in horse urine

Guo: It’s already soaked, this is a thing

Yu: What the hell Ah

Guo: Call the police. The police will come soon. This is fun. Who is this? This. I turned out my ID card. Yu Qian, I was just typing it. I What's the matter, I know each other, we are good brothers, let me handle the funeral arrangements. I'll come here to find the car that caused the accident. I'll finish the funeral and go home to deliver the letter. The most difficult thing is to go to your family to deliver the letter

Yu: Why

Guo: Think about it, go to your family and tell them, there is no one else in your family, just you and your father, old man 89 It’s such a misfortune that I lost my son. How do I tell the old man?

Yu: I can’t open my mouth

Guo: My son is gone. If I don’t say a word to protect him, the old man is doomed.

< p>Yu: That's not true

Guo: I'm just afraid of this, how can I play a small drum with my heart

Yu: Pay attention to methods

Guo : Then I have to go. Then when I looked out the window, I almost burst into tears

Yu: How miserable

Guo: You haven’t been back for months. The old man is alone. Poor, they are cooking mutton in the house right now

Yu: My father is careless

Guo: This one is lighting a big charcoal pot, and this one is an electric pot

Yu: Liangguozi

Guo: Lamb slices, beef, shrimp, fish fillets, crab sticks, and about 40 kinds of vegetables

Yu: Quite complete< /p>

Guo: White wine, beer, red wine, rice wine, and side dishes. The old man was alone in the room, setting up four tables, and sat down to eat. I'm so sorry, the old man was still in good spirits at that time, his face was rosy. He was 89 years old, but he had a mouth full of teeth missing, and he still had one tooth left, but when he was eating, his teeth were stuffed.

< p>Yu: Is there still one tooth left but a tooth plugged in?

Guo: He was obsessed with eating lotus roots

Yu: Ha---it won’t get better if he just eats anything

Guo: I hurried in. , I said: Master, where are you eating?

Yu: Don’t eat

Guo: I have to come and tell you something. Yu Qian, he was hit by a car and died. They were all torn apart, and the rest of the body was flattened to the ground, and the horse started peeing. Do you pay attention to methods?

Yu: This is called paying attention to methods. Why are you thinking about killing the old man?

Guo: After hearing this, your father gritted his teeth and stamped his feet——You Pass me the shrimp

Yu: Hey, it’s not my fault

Guo: Get a cup and drink

Yu: Where else to drink

Guo: I said, old man - stop talking, pour a glass, come - two little bees, here they come. . . .

Yu: Stop punching

Guo: So humorous

Yu: What a joke, this is dead

Guo: Drink After finishing the drink, the old man said that I was tired, so who could I take a nap?

I said I should lie down for a while

Yu: Go to sleep, the two of us

Guo: It’s half past five, get up, the old man sat up, hey, you mean Yu Qian is dead Already? < /p>

Yu: This is too little

Guo: Please order a little, old man, take a look: you get 200

Yu: There is a kickback

Guo: Everyone comes when good things happen

Yu: What kind of good thing is this?

Guo: This is a life-or-death friendship

Yu: : This friendship is quite impressive

Guo: The most remarkable thing is that he entrusted his wife with his son.

Yu: How do you say that?

Guo : The time for entrusting a wife and offering a son is limited today. We will have the opportunity to talk about this matter with everyone another day

Yu: In other circles, everyone says this, so you can tell everyone about this friendship. Speak

Guo: You have to listen

Yu: I don’t understand this, please tell me

Guo: If you are willing to die, I will be willing to bury

p>

Yu: Why, you have to talk about me?

Guo: No, just talk about it, talk about me!

Yu: Oh, you are here too

Guo: Hey, I am so excited to say this. I am very excited now. Everyone, thank you for supporting us

p>

Yu: You tell me, I feel at ease with you

Guo: It’s my turn to say this

Yu: What’s going on

Guo: You have to start this matter from you

Yu: You still have to have me

Guo: You didn’t get Yu Qian today

Yu : This time?

Guo: 75 years old

Yu: Oh, I am old

Guo: an old artist, a master of crosstalk, an authority in crosstalk, and the first crosstalk person in China

Yu: There is no one else

Guo: You set up a stall and talk cross talk at Tianqiao Lemen on time every day.

Yu: I also set up a stall to talk about cross talk

Guo: Live, there are more than 10 people in the audience every day

Yu: That’s it There are not many people here

Guo: I love to listen to your cross talk. There is a person standing outside the circle every day who loves to look at you. He is very well-dressed in suits and ties. He has listened to what you said today

Yu: What did you say?

Guo: (with accent) Mr. Yu, I have listened to you for many days and I really like your cross talk

Yu: Still a southerner

Guo : I am not from here. My ancestral home is Guangdong, but when I was young, I went to Nanyang with my father to develop in the Singapore area

Yu: Overseas

Guo: Yes, this time I came to Beijing specifically to have a look. I like our Chinese traditional art very much and hope to invite you to perform in Singapore.

Yu: Let me perform there?

Guo: That’s an annual salary of 1 million US dollars per year

Yu: That’s a lot

Guo: One *** is five years, are you interested? Ah

Yu: Ouch, this is so interesting

Guo: When you heard this, you were so happy that your nose bubbled with joy. How much can you earn in a day on the side of the road? Qian

Yu: That's

Guo: The savior is here, okay, I listen to you, I'll go. The ugly thing to say is that you are going alone, and you cannot bring your family members.

Yu: Alone?

Guo: Can you agree? When you think about it, what they say is reasonable. You and your family will have to pay for it.

Yu: Where is the money again?

Guo: They paid for it They are your actors, not your family members. But the temptation of five million in the past five years has been too great

Yu: I have to go

Guo: Between going and not going, Yu Qian was tossing back and forth in his heart. Especially if you are newly married

Yu: Wait a minute, I am 75 years old and just married

Guo: Your marriage has been very bumpy in your life. The first time you got married was when you were 9 years old. Arranged,

Yu: How. . .

Guo: Child bride, child, baby mother

Yu: That can’t be kicked from the sky to the ground

Guo: You will be 9 years old then, you That daughter-in-law is not big, 46

Yu: This is not small

Guo: There is no way. Later, I got married twice in my life, one ran away with your apprentice, and the other was taken back by my family

Yu: What a mess

Guo: So you gritted your teeth Stomping your feet and never getting married, until you are 75 years old, you meet a laid-off Hong Kong lady

Yu: There are still laid-off Hong Kong ladies

Guo: I just don’t want it anymore. They didn't let her do it anymore, so they chose a new one.

Yu: Oh

Guo: She was laid off and fell into your hands. The two got married. Just got married, less than 3 days ago, and this happened

Yu: Just 3 days ago

Guo: Tell me what to do, do you want to go or not?

< p>Yu: Reluctant to part with it

Guo: What will happen to my wife if I go? If I don’t go, I won’t be able to part with the five million. Having said that, what will this wife do if she really goes? I don’t have any relatives or friends in the whole of China, and I have only one friend in the Beijing area. Who do you want to entrust your daughter-in-law to?

Yu: Then I’ll entrust it to you

p>

Guo: Are you happy to entrust it to me?

Yu: You're welcome. We have no one in our family as you said. If I don't entrust it to you, who will I entrust it to?

Guo: It’s not that simple to say it. At her age and my age, I can crush people to death under the root of my tongue. There are people who can talk but not listen. Jumping into the Yellow River can’t wash them away. I have to take care of everything. (Slaps his own face) This

Yu: You are a face-conscious person

Guo: That’s right

Yu: What should I do?

< p>Guo: You agreed, flew away, and left your wife with me. I have to take care of you

Yu: How?

Guo: Where do you live? , Jinsong, next to the folk art troupe, as a person in your life, how many people are holding back revenge.

Yu: I have offended so many people.

Guo: I have to take care of them. What should I do if it’s unrealistic for me to come here every day? Think of another way. In Gu’an, Hebei Province, I rented a yard like this, with no village in front and no store in the back. There is a pit on the left, a well on the right, and a cemetery in front

Yu: Okay, let my wife put it inside the turret

Guo: It’s very clean. Get a car and bring all your things over here. Bring your sister-in-law over. You live here, just outside the door. Lock, I'll go back quickly.

I have to come at the appointed time.

Yu: Send things

Guo: Firewood, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar, tea, who cares? I have to take care of them all

Yu: You have to worry about it

Guo: I drove here and stopped here. I took out all the things and put them on the steps. (Knock on the door)

Yu: Knock Men

Guo: Sister-in-law, I got the rice and oil, the onions, ginger and garlic are also in the box. There are also vegetables and meat, please put them in the refrigerator quickly, I’m leaving

Yu: Hey, you send it in, don’t leave

Guo: Let’s go, I’m leaving (winks), let’s go

Yu: (beats with fan) Let’s go, you What do you mean when you say you can’t leave or not?

Guo: What’s wrong, why are you beating someone?

Yu: Nonsense, what are you doing with my wife and I with eyebrows all over our faces?

Guo: We can’t go into the house

Yu: Can’t you send me in?

Guo: Hey, you’re destroying me, you, her At my age, at my age, there were people who could talk but not listen. They would crush people to death under their tongues. If they jumped into the Yellow River and couldn’t wash themselves away, I had to take care of this (patting myself on the face)

Yu: It’s better to save face

Guo: I often come over to give you things. I spend countless amounts every day. This money is endless

Yu: That’s right, I have a home. Ah

Guo: The light can’t come in, it’s almost the end of the year, here it comes again, beef, chicken, fish, all the things needed for the New Year have been moved here and put away At the door, he took out an envelope with five thousand yuan in it and threw it in through the crack of the door. Who will spend the money? (beats chest) Me!

Yu: How to get through the door

Guo: During the New Year, she has to spend money

Yu: Send it in

Guo : Hehe, she was my age at that age, and at my age, there are people who can talk but not listen. They can crush people to death under their tongues. If they jump into the Yellow River, they won’t be able to wash them away. I have to take care of this (slapping myself on the face)

< p>Yu: Okay, please take care of your face

Guo: It’s been nearly a year, and I’ve been moving in boxes one by one, apples, hawthorns, red fruit slices, plums, sour plums,

Yu: Wait a minute

Guo: Green plums, milk powder, we spend a lot of money

Yu: You deserve the money you spent, don’t go into it sour, what? This means

Guo: She wants snacks. This costs a lot of money, just wait, it will cost money every year. At last you called. The five-year period has expired and it’s time to come back

Yu: I’m back

Guo: I have to deliver the letter. I have to go this time< /p>

Yu: Gotta go in

Guo: Go to the door, park the car, come here and take out the key

Yu: Take out the key! ?

Guo: Oh, I’m so exhausted. As soon as you enter the door, your wife is breastfeeding the child

Yu: She has children

Guo: Put your coat on the bed, throw it on the kang, wipe your face, and pour a glass of water ,

Yu: You're welcome when he arrives

Guo: Sitting on the edge of the kang, leaning on the quilt, hey, Xiao Pan,

Yu: My wife Surname Pan

Guo: Jinlian

Yu: My wife’s name is Pan Jinlian

Guo: Jinlian, he wrote a letter and said he would be back in the next two days. Look. What to do about this matter. Your wife is angry: What should I do? Anyway, things are already like this, so let’s do whatever you want.

Yu: She is willing to risk everything.

Guo: Anyway, you gentlemen can get into trouble. I will listen to you. I have finished buying Poisonous Rats

Yu: This is a situation, this is a situation with you

Guo: Don’t talk nonsense, she was my age, my age , there are those who can talk but not listen, crush people to death under their tongues, jump into the Yellow River to wash them away, I have to take care of this (slapping myself on the face)

Yu: You have to take care of this? Your thing is not as good as mine. (Slap your butt) What kind of thing are you doing?

Guo: I don’t like to hear what you say. Isn’t that just a casual incident? What should I do? You have to kill me. Just as he was talking, he opened the door and the eldest son came in.

Yu: Ah

Guo: Holding a small sign in his hand, it says A "let" word: Dad, you are here.

Haha - if you still call me daddy, you will die if you call me daddy again. Let me tell you, it will only take two or three days. I will send you back to Beijing and let us have a relative who has a face like a bun. Let’s call him daddy. You’re right, I’ll buy you candy, but you’re wrong, I’ll tear you apart and feed you to the eagles, do you know?

Yu: So cruel

Guo: Don’t tell me about the one in my arms Well, that little one doesn’t know this. Okay, let’s hire a car. We’ll pull the cars back one by one and leave them at Jinsong for you. The house will be painted for you and your things will be packed. I’ll pick you up at the airport and sit in the house to eat. You sit in the middle, order a hot pot, prepare some dishes, and buy roast duck. Your wife sits on the side, with children on both sides. I sit with my hands hanging down, pick up the wine glass, and have a great time, enjoying all the wealth in the world. Hey, can’t you make this friend?

Yu: Yes

Guo: Make it!

Yu: Give it to your grandma to give her a grandson

Guo: How can you enjoy it

Yu: You are not like a human being to do this

Guo: Who said that?

Yu: You are so messed up

Guo: You are not right

Yu: It’s you who is wrong for me That's not right

Guo: This is called rudeness

Yu: Why are you rude? This is what you did

Guo: A dirty heart

Yu: I’m not a bad-hearted person

Guo: I’m doing it for your own good

Yu: You can’t decide who is good for you

Guo: Everyone understands this

Yu: We are still friends

Guo: I am not sorry for you

Yu: This is called sorry for me

Guo: Your wife lives in the house I spent money to rent in Gu'an

Yu: You deserve it

Guo: I don't go in every day during the day

< p>Yu: Yes, you haven’t come out night after night. You told me this, but I haven’t found you yet. I

Guo: You treat your kindness as a donkey’s liver and lungs

Yu: What kind of intentions do you have?

Guo: This is called not showing friendship

Yu: Who has friendship with whom?

Guo: When you leave You’re already 75,

Yu: It’s none of your business

Guo: You’ll be 80 when you come back

Yu: It’s none of your business

< p>Guo: You are already as old as Fan Zhenyu

Yu: You can’t control it

Guo: You have no children

Yu: You have no children to control you What's going on?

Guo: Your old Yu family is dead

Yu: It has nothing to do with you

Guo: What will you do if you die one day< /p>

Yu: Stop talking about this

Guo: I have a son wearing a flag but you don’t

Yu: You don’t have to worry about it

Guo: I was so exhausted that I stuck two sticks on my legs and yelled at the two dogs to drag you out

Yu: That’s okay, I don’t need you

Guo: I’m thinking about you

Yu: Don't worry about it

Guo: We have a conscience in the world. If you tell lies, the lights will go out.

Yu: Don't worry about it.

Guo: That child is mine

Yu: What do you mean?

Guo "(crying) That child is mine

Yu: Your child?

Guo: You are eighty years old when you come back. Do you have that heart? Without that strength, the old Yu family will be destroyed by your hands. You have wronged me. Hey, your heart is in your armpit. You are sorry for your friends by doing this

Yu: Oh , your child

Guo: My biological son, I adopted it to you

Yu: Hi, I didn’t hear you clearly

Guo: You died unjustly I am dead, this is the end of me if I die (bumping into the table)

Yu: Oh, Mr. Guo, I was wrong, I was wrong

Guo: Do ??you know you are wrong

p>

Yu: I was wrong

Guo: People can't be like this, they have to follow the conscience of heaven and earth

Yu: Yes, you are absolutely right

Guo: That child is mine

Yu: It’s yours

Guo: Your wife gave birth to it

Yu: It’s still the same

< p> Right?