Who tells a joke that can make my stomach laugh?

One day, I was walking in the street. I want to go to the toilet. I saw a public toilet on the side of the road and rushed in. When I went in, I found it was a ladies' room. Fortunately, no one was there. I turned around and met a little sister. Before I could speak, I saw my little sister blushing, lowering her head and saying "I'm sorry". Then she quickly turned and rushed into the men's room!

There is a mountain man who has never seen the world. One day, he went to the park in the city and saw a man doing push-ups. He doesn't know what to do. He walked several times and didn't understand: why is there no one down there, just trying?

A beautiful woman found lipstick too heavy, wiped it with a wet tissue and threw it on the road.

An old man picked it up, looked at it for a long time and suddenly woke up. He caught up and said, girl, this ultra-thin one is easy to fall off!

There lived a man, a hostess and three sons on a country farm. In the morning, the hostess woke up and looked at the pasture outside the window. She found the only cow left in their family dead on the grassland. This desperate scene attacked her-how can she continue to support her family? Desperate, she hanged herself. When the man woke up and found his wife dead, like his cow, he began to watch this hopeless scene, so he shot himself.

When the eldest son got up, he saw that his parents and cattle were dead, so he decided to jump into the river and commit suicide. When he reached the river, he found a mermaid sitting on the bank. The mermaid said, "I know why you are depressed." As long as you fall in love with me five times in a row, I will restore everything to its original state. " The eldest son agreed to try, but after four rounds, he was overwhelmed, so the mermaid drowned him in the river.

Then, the second son woke up and found what had happened. He also decided to end his life by the river. Similarly, the mermaid said to him, "If you love me ten times in a row, I will return your parents, brother and cow." The second son tried his best and only reached the seventh round, but he still couldn't satisfy the mermaid, so he jumped into the river and killed himself.

The youngest son woke up to find his parents, cow and two brothers dead. He felt that life was full of despair, so he threw himself into the river. In the river, he met a mermaid, and the lewd mermaid said to him, "I saw the whole incident, and I can make everything back to its original state, as long as you accompany me for fifteen times in a row."

The younger son replied, "That's it? Why not twenty times? "

The mermaid was startled by this request and took a step back;

The younger son went on to say, "Hey, why not 25 times?"

Just as the mermaid was unwilling to agree to his request, the younger son said, "Why not thirty times?"

Finally, the mermaid said, "That's enough! If you stay with me for thirty times in a row, I will return everyone to you intact. " However, the younger son said, "Wait a minute, how do I know if you will be tortured to death like that cow after 30 rounds?" There lived a couple, a hostess and three sons on a country farm. In the morning, the hostess woke up and looked at the pasture outside the window. She found the only cow left in their family dead on the grassland. This desperate scene attacked her-how can she continue to support her family? Desperate, she hanged herself. When the man woke up and found his wife dead, like his cow, he began to watch this hopeless scene, so he shot himself.

When the eldest son got up, he saw that his parents and cattle were dead, so he decided to jump into the river and commit suicide. When he reached the river, he found a mermaid sitting on the bank. The mermaid said, "I know why you are depressed." As long as you fall in love with me five times in a row, I will restore everything to its original state. " The eldest son agreed to try, but after four rounds, he was overwhelmed, so the mermaid drowned him in the river.

Then, the second son woke up and found what had happened. He also decided to end his life by the river. Similarly, the mermaid said to him, "If you love me ten times in a row, I will return your parents, brother and cow." The second son tried his best and only reached the seventh round, but he still couldn't satisfy the mermaid, so he jumped into the river and killed himself.

The youngest son woke up to find his parents, cow and two brothers dead. He felt that life was full of despair, so he threw himself into the river. In the river, he met a mermaid, and the lewd mermaid said to him, "I saw the whole incident, and I can make everything back to its original state, as long as you accompany me for fifteen times in a row."

The younger son replied, "That's it? Why not twenty times? "

The mermaid was startled by this request and took a step back;

The younger son went on to say, "Hey, why not 25 times?"

Just as the mermaid was unwilling to agree to his request, the younger son said, "Why not thirty times?"

Finally, the mermaid said, "That's enough! If you stay with me for thirty times in a row, I will return everyone to you intact. " However, the younger son said, "Wait a minute, how do I know that after thirty rounds, you will be killed by me like that cow." When two people were crossing the African desert in a hot air balloon, the balloon suddenly fell down.

They jumped out of the balloon safely and walked in the desert for two days before meeting the oasis.

Two people rushed to the water source next to the oasis, and there was a card next to the water source, which read a paragraph:

"Warning: drinkers will die! Chief word "

They have been thirsty for two days and don't care about drinking water.

At this time, a group of natives suddenly appeared, tied them together and took them back to the tribe to see the chief.

The chief asked the two men, "I usually order you to cook and eat, but today is my birthday."

If that one can bring back a hundred fruits, consider letting that one go. 』

Two people obedient, separately to find fruit.

The first man brought back a hundred wild cherries.

The chief ordered him to put a hundred wild cherries in his ass one by one and not to laugh, so he spared him.

The man obediently stuffed wild cherries into his ass one by one.

He doesn't smile when he's stuffed for fifty and doesn't smile when he's stuffed for ninety.

After he stuffed the ninety-ninth cherry into it, he suddenly fell on the ground and burst out laughing until tears came out.

The village chief was surprised and asked:

"If you still have a cherry, you can avoid death. What are you laughing at? 』

The man smiled and answered:

"Ha ha ... look, my friend ... ha ha ... he brought back a hundred big watermelons ... ha ha ..." Once upon a time, there was a silly son who married a good daughter-in-law and went into the bridal chamber after paying homage. Dale was surprised. He asked his daughter-in-law, "Hey, hey, what should I call you?"

The daughter-in-law, angry and funny, replied, "It's called the king of hell."

On the wedding night, the husband and wife sleep together, and the wife hooks her husband with her feet. After being awakened, I didn't know what to do, so I called his father: "Dad, look, the ghost king is hooking me."

His father was startled and told the terrifying story loudly. "Terrible, terrifying, my son is still young, I am old. Hook me if you want. "

Mao Mao met Niu and greeted him politely, but Niu made fun of the cat and said, "You have a beard so young!" " "

The cat said angrily, "Your breasts are so big, why don't you wear a bra!" " "

Mao Mao met Niu and greeted him politely, but Niu made fun of the cat and said, "You have a beard so young!" " "

One summer, it was very hot.

A middle-aged man was going to bed on a business trip and checked into a small hotel. Suddenly the phone rang: "sorry, I'm the front desk." Does our hotel need special services? "

"No, thanks," the man replied.

After putting down the phone, the man tossed and turned, unable to sleep, so he grabbed the phone and called the front desk and said, "Give me special service." Soon a young girl came in.

The man asked how much it was for a night. The woman said "one hundred"

The man said, "Take it off and sit on the sofa."

The woman sat naked on the sofa.

The man went back to bed and lay down, and soon there was a loud voice. ...

At dawn, women can't bear to wake up men anymore. Why did you call me here?

Hey hey!

The man said: There are too many mosquitoes, so I can't sleep. ...

A maintenance man came to repair the TV set, and there was only one very sexy woman at home. The maintenance man kept looking at the woman while repairing the TV. After the repair, the woman said to the repairman, "I have an embarrassing request." Can you promise me? " The repairman vaguely felt something, and the woman continued, "The thing is, my husband is very weak, and there are some things that can't be pointed at him." You see, you are a man and I am a woman ... In fact, I noticed your strong body as soon as you came in ... "

The man's saliva is almost flowing out, and he can't wait to say, "Then let's start!" " "

"You are so refreshing!" The woman replied happily, "My new refrigerator is at the door, please help me move in!" " "

Once upon a time there was a church with a priest in it. If the local people can't have boys, they can only pray in the church. It was really difficult to try, so someone asked someone to investigate, and the results were all true, but I don't know why, the baby boys born were very similar to the priests in the church.

A couple snuggled up sweetly in the park. Men can't help sneaking around when they see that women's hair is so supple. The woman said coily, "Alas! Hate! "

The man's heart itched even more and stole it again. The woman said, "Well, no!" " "

Hearing this, the man's heart was about to fly, and he touched it again. Suddenly, the woman stood up and said rudely, "don't touch it!" My wig is falling off! ! ! "

The Beijing-Kowloon Railway is open to traffic, and farmers along the line watch it by the roadside. A woman in the car came for her period, but after correcting the paper, she went out the window. Paper stuck to a farmer's face, and the farmer took it down and said, honey, it's fast! A piece of paper can break your nose and bleed!

There is a girl who works in an IT company. One morning, the weather was so fine that the IT girl was so absorbed in her work that she didn't even notice that her skirt was caught in a drawer. When she stood up, her skirt hissed and was torn. Colleagues have all heard about fame, and IT girls quickly picked up an IT magazine around them to cover it. Unexpectedly, my colleagues burst into laughter. It turns out that the cover of the magazine is an online game advertisement: "Super capacity, which can accommodate100000 users at the same time". IT girl picked up another magazine. Colleagues laughed again. The cover of this magazine is anti-virus software: "Beware of viruses". IT girls are going to faint. She fainted when she picked up the third magazine. The third magazine is a hardware magazine, and the cover is a U disk advertisement: "Plug and Play". In a daze, I still remember to protect the key parts, so I pulled the fourth magazine to cover it. When I woke up, I saw a shopping guide magazine that said, "30% off!" " Faint again.