The best disgusting joke

1. When I was young, I was dishonest about eating. In order to educate me, an old farmer said to me: It has been hard work for 60 years and there was no food to eat. I never threw away the boogers I picked out.

2. There was a rich man looking for a servant. The interview topic was to use the toilet. The first few came out without washing their hands after using the toilet. The rich man sent them away. Only one of them washed his hands, so the rich man stayed. But one day, the rich man found that he came out without washing his hands. The rich man asked him why? The servant replied: "I brought toilet paper today..."

3. A man saw There was a big sale in a store, so I walked in. "What are you buying?" "I want to buy dog ??food." "We have regulations. You must prove that you have a dog." "Where is such a regulation?" "This is what discounted goods are like." The man spent a long time with the salesperson. , the salesperson still refused to sell it to him. There was no other way, so the man had no choice but to go home and bring the dog with him, and then he bought dog food. A few days later, the man went to the store again to buy cat food. "Give me two boxes of cat food." "We have regulations. You must prove that you have a cat." It was the same salesperson. The man spent another long time with her, but in the end he had to go home and bring the cat over to buy cat food. A few days later, the man came to the store carrying a large cardboard box with a hole in it and found the salesperson. "What are you buying?" "You'll know when you put your hand in." The salesperson put his hand in: "What is it? It's sticky." "I want to buy two rolls of toilet paper."

4. A man went to visit his grandmother with his friends. While he was talking to his grandmother, his friend started eating peanuts on the coffee table and finished them all. As they left, his friend said to Grandma, "Thank you for the peanuts." Grandma responded, "Oh! Uh-huh! Ouch! Since I lost all my teeth, I can only suck the chocolate out of them. I'm old." , cough...

5. One time, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish, but the waiter told him that it was already sold. It's over. "Is it really sold out? he asked disappointedly. "Sir, it's really sold out." You see, the last one was sold to the gentleman at that table. "The waiter replied. The man followed the waiter's instructions and saw a very respectable gentleman sitting next to him. The gentleman's meal was almost finished, but the "Spicy Vermicelli Pot" was still full. The man He felt that the gentleman was wasting delicious food, so he walked up to the gentleman, pointed to the "Spicy Vermicelli Pot" and asked politely: "Sir, do you want this?" "The gentleman shook his head gracefully. So the man immediately sat down, picked up the spoon and wolfed it down. After a while, half of the meal was gone, and suddenly he found a very small but full-furred one lying at the bottom of the casserole. The little mouse. Feeling sick, the man vomited all the vermicelli he had eaten back into the casserole. While he was turning his stomach, the gentleman looked at him with sympathy and said, "It's disgusting, isn't it?" I was like this just now..."

6. On this day, the hotel owner was patrolling the lobby. A beggar came up and said, "Can I give you a toothpick, boss?" "The boss gave him one and sent him away. After a while, another beggar came, also asking for toothpicks. The boss thought to himself, why did the beggar ask for toothpicks instead of asking for food? He also gave him one and sent him away. It was not too old. Another beggar came. The boss said to him: "Are you here to ask for toothpicks too?" The beggar said: "Someone vomited, but I was a step too late. The two beggars in front had already eaten everything I could eat, and now only the soup is left." Can you give me a straw?

7. The eldest and second child were on a plane. The second child got airsick and kept vomiting. One bag was full, so the boss had to go get it. When he came back, he found that everyone on the plane was vomiting. The boss asked the reason, and the second child said: "I saw that this bag was also full of vomiting, so I had to drink half of the bag, and they all vomited."

If you see it now If you haven't vomited, then I have to admit that you are a master, and then I will use a trick---

Nirvana-----

One day, the boss and the boss Er went to the theater to watch a play again and saw the two of them arguing over the development of the plot and made a bet about it. The boss pointed to the row of spittoons in front and said, "The loser has to take a sip of what's there." Unfortunately, the boss lost, so he frowned and took a sip. The two then bet on the following plot, and this time, the second child lost. The second child picked up a spittoon and drank fifteen big gulps.

The boss was shocked and looked down in admiration. He said to the second brother, "You are so amazing. You can drink fifteen gulps in a row!" The second brother shook his head and said, "It's not that I want to drink. The phlegm in that spittoon is too thick. I really don't want to drink it." Keep biting!"