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Simple and short English jokes with translation?
Boys and snails
Boys and snails
A farmer's boy went to look for snails. When he picked them up with his hands full, he started to make a fire to roast snails. Because he is going to eat them. When the sun rises, snails begin to feel hot. They gradually shrink back into their shells and make a hissing sound, which is the sound they always make when doing so. When the boy heard this, he said, "You abandoned animals, how can you bear to whistle when your house is burning?"
A country boy looked for snails everywhere. When his hands are full of snails, he is going to make a fire to roast snails. When the fire is lit, snails begin to feel hot. They retreat to the depths of the hard shell and make a hissing sound at the same time. When the boy heard the hiss of the snail, he said, "You guys who are dying, how can you still whistle when the bird's nest is on fire?"
: hello mom, hello dad
A child custody case opened. The judge thinks that both mother and father are suitable parents, so he can't decide who he should award full custody to.
So he asked the little boy, "Would you like to live with your mother?"
"No." The boy said.
"Why not?" The judge said.
"Because she hit me."
The judge said, "Well, then you can live with your father."
"Oh, no," cried the boy. "He hit me, too."
The judge was dumbfounded and asked, "Well, who do you want to live with?"
"I want to live with the new york Knicks!"
"Why?" Asked the judge.
"They never beat anyone."
The Lord is my shepherd
A Sunday school teacher decided to let her young students remember the most frequently quoted passage in the Bible. Psalm 23. She gave the children a month to learn poetry. Little Rick was excited about the task-but he just couldn't remember the hymn.
After a lot of practice, he can only scrape through the first line. Ricky was very nervous on the day when the children were arranged to recite hymn 23 in front of the congregation.
When it was his turn, he went to the microphone and proudly said, "The Lord is my shepherd, and that's all I need to know."
: Moses & Red Sea
Nine-year-old Joey was asked by his mother what he learned in Sunday school.
"Well, mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines to carry out rescue missions and lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he arrived at the Red Sea, he asked his army to build a pontoon bridge, and all the people crossed it safely. Then, he radioed the headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelis were saved. "
"Joey, did your teacher really teach you that?" His mother asked.
"Well, no, mom. However, if I speak like a teacher, you will never believe me! "
: higher power
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in biblical times. However, there is a higher power. Can someone tell me what this is? "
A child blurted out, "Ace!"
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