The eunuch is under the bed of the emperor and queen, and the boudoir is cold.

The eunuch watched the sleeping of the emperor and the queen. The eunuch knelt on the ground and replied, "If I go back to the emperor, I will spend the fifth watch under the bed."

Emperor: "What do you hear?" Eunuch: "First, you and the Empress are enjoying the painting." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "Listen to you and Empress, let me see the breasts of Shuangfeng." Emperor: "What about Er Geng?" Eunuch: "During the second watch, you seem to have fallen to the ground." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "Listen to the empress: come up quickly!" " Emperor: "What should I do in the dead of night?" Eunuch: "You seem to be eating crabs." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "whatever you say: break your leg!" " Emperor: "What about the fourth watch?" Eunuch: "It seems that your mother-in-law is coming for the fourth time." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "I heard the empress shout: Oh, my mother, oh, my mother! ! ! "Emperor:" What about the fifth watch? " Eunuch: "You are playing chess with the empress." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "I heard the empress say: one more shot, one more shot!" ! ! ! "What's so funny about the conversation between a eunuch and the emperor? Eunuchs eavesdrop on the emperor and queen. A new eunuch, afraid of falling asleep and not hearing the emperor's orders, hid under the bed. I found it the next morning ... The emperor said, "Well, you slave, how many hours did you stay under my bed?" The eunuch knelt on the ground and replied, "If you go back to the emperor, the slave has been under the bed for five nights." The emperor said, "What did you hear?" Eunuch: "First, you and the Empress are enjoying the painting." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "Listen to you and Empress, let me see the breasts of Shuangfeng." Emperor: "What about Er Geng?" Eunuch: "During the second watch, you seem to have fallen to the ground." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "Listen to the empress: come up quickly!" " Emperor: "What should I do in the dead of night?" Eunuch: "You seem to be eating crabs." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "whatever you say: break your leg!" " Emperor: "What about the fourth watch?" Eunuch: "It seems that your mother-in-law is coming for the fourth time." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "I heard the empress shout: Oh, my mother, oh, my mother! ! ! "Emperor:" What about the fifth watch? " Eunuch: "You are playing chess with the empress." Emperor: "What do you mean?" Eunuch: "I heard the empress say: one more shot, one more shot!" !

Eunuch, queen, emperor, physician joke eunuch eavesdropping on the results of the emperor and queen * * *

A new eunuch, afraid that he would not hear the emperor's orders when he fell asleep, and afraid that he would delay the good things of the emperor and the queen, hid under the bed. I found it the next morning ... The emperor said, "Well, you slave, how many hours did you stay under my bed?" The eunuch knelt on the ground and replied, "If you go back to the emperor, the slave has been under the bed for five days." Emperor: What did you hear? Eunuch: First, you and the queen are enjoying the painting. Emperor: What do you mean? Eunuch: Listen to you and Empress. Let me see those twin peaks and beautiful breasts. Emperor: What about the second watch? Eunuch: During the second watch, you seem to have fallen to the ground. Emperor: What do you mean? Eunuch: Listen to the Empress: Come on up! Emperor: What about in the dead of night? Eunuch: You seem to be eating crabs. Emperor: What do you mean? Eunuch: whatever you say: break your leg! Emperor: What about the fourth watch? Eunuch: It seems that your mother-in-law is here at the fourth watch. Emperor: What do you mean? Eunuch: I heard the queen shout: Oh, my God! ! ! Emperor: What about the fifth watch? Eunuch: You are playing chess with your queen. Emperor: What do you mean? Eunuch: One more shot! What the ancient eunuch said to the emperor's empress, eunuch (tài jiàn), also called eunuch, usually refers to China's loss of sexual capacity in ancient times and becoming a neutral person who is neither male nor female. They are officials who serve emperors, monarchs and their families. Also known as temple people, eunuchs (choosing sons), eunuchs, officials, middle officials, internal officials, internal ministers, internal servants, internal supervisors and so on. The name "eunuch" first appeared in Liao Dynasty. It was originally the title of a senior position in * * *, not necessarily a eunuch. In the Ming Dynasty, there were twelve prisons and twenty-four yamen in the imperial court, and the leaders were eunuchs, all of whom were eunuchs. Junior eunuchs are called "less prison" and "middle prison", and senior eunuchs are called "eunuchs"; So "eunuch" became the title of senior eunuch, and later became the general name of eunuch. 1July, 923, Puyi abandoned the palace eunuch.

What do ladies-in-waiting and eunuchs in the Western Han Dynasty call themselves in front of the emperor and queen? Palace ladies and eunuchs in the Western Han Dynasty called themselves slaves before the emperor and queen.

Handmaiden, originally refers to men and women who lost their freedom and were enslaved, and later refers to male and female servants; Eunuch's self-styled title of emperor, empresses, etc. "Slave" refers to a servant waiting for his master. The word "slave" appeared in the Spring and Autumn Period, just a name for a servant! During the Ming dynasty, eunuchs were called "factory ministers" and "internal ministers", and all ministers called themselves "ministers" and had no slave titles. The appellation of Ming Dynasty was still used in the early Qing Dynasty. However, in order to facilitate control, the Qing emperor also imprisoned the people's minds and forced the Han nationality and other ethnic groups to change their customs and costumes. At first, only eunuchs and maids in the palace called themselves slaves. However, in Yongzheng period, these customs began to spread, and some domestic ministers began to call themselves "domestic slaves". First, they belittle themselves to please their master. Second, outsiders and hosts feel that they are more loyal to their hosts than others, and the relationship is closer than the average person! In the face of the emperor and his concubines, North Korean princes and ministers began to call themselves slaves to show their infinite loyalty to the emperor and his concubines. At this time, slaves have become special terms for invitations to princes, ministers and servants. What does it mean that the emperor doesn't worry about the eunuch? There are still many rules in ancient palaces. At that time, in order to let the emperor not take any chances on a person's heart, and also to show sympathy for the emperor's dragon body, the Qing room stipulated that the emperor and his concubine should not have sex for more than two hours. When the time comes, the eunuch will shout "It's time" at the door. Even after shouting several times, the eunuch wrapped his concubine in silk and carried her away if the emperor didn't let her go. This is the origin of the sentence "The emperor is in no hurry".

Why did the emperor castrate eunuchs? The origin of eunuchs is really * * *!

Eunuchs are courtiers in the palace, shouldering the heavy responsibility of supervising seventy concubines in three palaces and six hospitals and protecting the emperor. According to legend, at the beginning, there was a rule for eunuchs in the palace, and the number must be odd, and it was 10 1, all of which were beautiful and strong. Like normal people, they are not castrated. Every night, in front of the imperial concubine or queen, the emperor circled the roster, and then the eunuch handed the post to the lucky person. The lucky ones then have to prepare for the emperor's good luck, such as taking a bath, * * and so on. When the time came, the eunuch sent the emperor here, and then lit two lamps in front of the door until dawn. This is called the ever-burning dragon and phoenix lamp, which proves that the emperor lived here. It is said that among 10 1 eunuchs, there was a eunuch named * *, who was in his twenties, smart, good-looking and talkative, and was very popular with the emperor, so the emperor took him as a eunuch who specially waited on his sleep. * * When I was young, I couldn't help but have a boiling passion when I saw the emperor enjoying the happiness of human relations every night. * * I couldn't help it. Suddenly an evil thought came into my mind, so I secretly changed the name of the unfortunate post of the emperor and dedicated it to the empress. Although it was late, it was not surprising that the emperor changed his mind temporarily, so the queen had no doubt and made all the preparations for welcoming the emperor. * * See it's about time, just steal through the emperor's soaring crown and dragon robe jade belt, learn the appearance of the emperor, accustomed to, the empress also didn't see any flaw, just sleep together. At the second watch, * * climbed out of the phoenix bed and slipped away. After putting the emperor's robes and dragon crowns back in their original places, he immediately went back to his residence, casually found a vacant seat and slept quietly. Happened, * * left a little while, the emperor woke up, he couldn't sleep, so he got dressed. But when he looked up, he suddenly found a light on at the door of the queen's bedroom. He couldn't help wondering and went over. When he entered the living room of the Empress, she began to ask questions, but the Empress said first: Long live going to the Third Palace and Sixth Hospital every night. This is the spirit of dragon and horse, and it is time to rest. Why go to other places, eat oil and salt, and listen to the sound? The emperor immediately knew that someone had entered the palace under an assumed name, but he was very shrewd, held back his temper, and freely promised the empress a few words and left! The emperor didn't say anything, but he was very angry and quite calculating. He secretly told himself not to be impulsive about it. If all the officials know, how can he govern himself? This person has not been found, and an emperor has also been cuckolded, which is not a great shame for the enterprise. I wondered who did it, and only the eunuch knew it at night, so he quietly went to the eunuch's residence. He thought that if he found that person, he would definitely be unable to sleep, so he touched it, felt the heartbeat of * *, and soon secretly lost a hair, hoping to see you escape there. At this time, the emperor came back. Thought of a good way, he quietly cut other people's hair and arrested people on the second emperor, but when he saw that he was dumbfounded and couldn't catch it, he castrated all the eunuchs, and he was safe from now on! Txt(3) boudoir (1)