Classic humorous phrases (50 selected sentences)

1, let me deeply feel the greatness of beauty.

2. Memories are deposited in the traces of years.

3. Everyone's first screen name is an idiot.

It's okay to step on my foot. Don't step on my shoes!

You are a bag that can only be used to hold pens.

6. When you are sad, kneel down and hug yourself.

The more people I know, the more I like animals.

8. The most unpleasant thing is that you can do whatever you want.

9. You asked me if I had any religious beliefs, and I said, Does narcissism count?

10, some classic humorous jokes can make people laugh. First model essay network

1 1. Life is like a super girl, and a pure man sticks to the end.

12, I said: I have a life outside of work! So, I worked overtime.

13. The best way to ruin a song is to set it as an alarm.

14, I hope to go to school for a holiday after class. My goal has always been persistent.

15, the stars are bright, not as good as the moon alone; A hundred birds singing together is not as good as a tiger whistling.

16 is right, sometimes it seems wrong; Mistakes sometimes seem right.

17, the world is so beautiful, but you are so grumpy, which is not good, not good.

18, it is said that when two men and one woman walk in the street, three people will feel like light bulbs.

19, God, please let me grow another five centimeters. I'm willing to lose ten catties in exchange.

20. The disaster of life is born in the hotbed of life. Neglect is a great love.

2 1, the face is a thing outside the body, you don't have to, money is a must, you have to.

22. Great men are great because you are kneeling. Cut off a great man's head. You are as tall as he is.

23. Only a woman who is ashamed to die and refuses to show her majesty, like diusim, is the only example of this truth.

24. The second row of letters on the keyboard means to cry after falling in love with each other, and conversely, it is love to open chrysanthemums to attack and defend.

25. The lost happiness is the chrysanthemum on your ass. Usually it feels bright only when you have diarrhea.

26. God lied to everyone, because hell is the most beautiful! The Buddha knew the truth, so the Buddha said: If I don't go to hell, who will go to hell?

27. What is cruelty? For a man, I broke his three legs; For the male dog, I broke his five legs.

28. The polar bear resolutely left the North Pole, leaving his relatives and friends behind. The polar bear decided to leave. Relatives and friends repeatedly asked, and the polar bear shouted: It's too cold!

29. Yes, as long as there is such pure beauty as a young lady, there is hope for society. My heart is boiling again and the blood in my chest is burning again!

In such a materialistic money society, it is undoubtedly the greatest luck in my life to see such a pure and lovely lady.

3 1, shortly after Confucius' father was born, Confucius' mother only had. It seems that I have to find a good girl and have a Confucius.

32. What is your husband's annual salary? God, it's much better than my home. You are so happy. The friend said. This is the basic salary? The friend asked again. ..... friends.

33. Miss, you look great, great. The only thing I can do is to hide your jade photos in my personal computer photo album, keep them well and take them out to enjoy at any time.

34. As the saying goes, a lady is a gentleman. I finally understand what I lack now. Is the young lady's confidante, with a face of sinking fish and falling geese.

35. After Hui Hui and the kindergarten children went to the zoo, her mother asked her: What is the most beautiful thing in the zoo? Hui Hui said: Elephant. It has two tails, one in the back and the other in the front.

36. Miss Yu's photo is like lightning that pierces the night sky in the dark, like sunshine that tears the dark clouds, which instantly makes me drink nectar and makes me understand that real beauty is real in this world.

37. Climb the mountain with friends to watch the sunrise. A friend pointed to the sky and said, I saw it! I saw it, too! At this time, someone came out with trousers in the distance and scolded: Look at that white one! What are you yelling about?

38. The master's prestige is created by the servant; The prestige of leaders is created by subordinates; The prestige of a great official was created by slaves; The prestige of a star is created by the audience; Women's prestige is created by men.

39. Before Tomb-Sweeping Day, a friend who lived in the city was going to visit his hometown. One of his fellow villagers asked him to bring some clothes and money home and sent a text message saying: burn some clothes and money for me!

40. No smoking, no drinking, no playing mahjong, no room, no car, no money, no job, love wife, love children, love parents, love friends and love you. Don't worry. If you promise me, I will leave my wife.

4 1, friend, are you okay? Every time I turn on my cell phone and see my name, I will try to contact you immediately, but alas! Throwing caution to the wind anyway, isn't it money? We are not stingy people!

42, but I immediately thought, if others can't see such a beautiful woman, isn't that a waste of God's efforts? After a painful ideological struggle, I finally made up my mind to sacrifice myself and make contributions to myself. I want to show this jade photo to the world!

43. When I was in primary school, I liked to sleep in class. Once I wrote a composition entitled (If I were a spider) for the homework assigned by the Chinese teacher, and asked my classmates after class. I racked my brains at home at night and wrote an article (if I were a pig). Then I got angry at school.

I like playing basketball after work. On one occasion, male and female colleagues were playing basketball, and when they were excited, they suddenly clicked and the spring scenery leaked out. They don't know what to do. At this time, a female colleague said: Don't wear open-backed pants here. Go home and change.

45. Ever since I saw those so-called beauties hugging, I have lost hope for beauties. Legends are disillusioned, and myths end. What's the point of staying in this world? I didn't expect to see a young lady today. I was so excited that I couldn't help crying in front of the screen.

46. Facing Miss Yu Rong, I was so shocked that I could hardly move. I can't help but open the jade photo of Miss again and again, because of the way Miss splits the paper. I'm a little excited every time I see it. I have been wondering if there is a fairy who is smart under the delicate appearance of the young lady, so that people don't know the taste of meat in March and have endless affection for three days.

47. I can't help cheering up after seeing the photo of Miss Li. I realized that seven meridians and eight veins are one of them, and seven orifices are six and a half orifices. Beauty is easy to get since ancient times, but the word temperament is rarely occupied. When the young lady was young, it was really rare to close the moon and feel ashamed of herself! It is often said that there were four beautiful women in ancient times, which are vast and strange, making people think about tea and rice.

48. The ancients took the beauty of flowers and moons as evidence. The beauty of flowers and moons, such as the rising of the red sun, is bright; River ups and downs, a diarrhea in the ocean; Qi Hua's first child, Emperor Baifang; A cadre will make a fortune, he has his own awn; The sky is pale and the ground is yellow; Even if there were years, there were eight famines; Xiao Sheng's admiration for young ladies is like a raging river. The seas run dry and the rocks crumble, and the sky is falling. He will not change his mind. I can't be calm for a long time after seeing the jade photo and the jade capacity of the young lady.

49. This young lady looks really nice. The hairstyle is decent and the clothes are decent, which has won the style inherited from the West. It also carries the thin wood around the fat swallow. In my life, I can see the jade photos of the young lady. This is really the luck of junior students. Seeing the jade photo of the young lady, I feel unspeakable sadness in my heart. What if I never see such a stunning woman again? what am I supposed to do？ It was not until I collected the jade photos of the young lady without hesitation that my inner excitement gradually subsided.

50. Now, God bless me, I am a bachelor, and the sea has changed. Xx in xx2000, the flat land of Shenzhou in China was thundering, flying sand and stones, and dancing in the sky. In the dim light, I saw a stunning beauty standing on the roof between heaven and earth. This woman is wearing gauze and her eyes are flirting. She looks like a fairy. Her waist is slightly bent, her jade arm is gently pulled, and she looks back and smiles, and pear blossoms bring rain. Blink and smile, chaos begins to open, blink and smile, Nu Wa makes people, blink and smile, and niche falls. It is the luck of the country and the happiness of the people to get such great beauty. Why not let people be overjoyed?