Humorous jokes and lines

Funny lines: Why don't you wear your seat belt? Afraid of strangling your face? ! I'm pinching my chest! You're hitting me in the face! More jokes are in the joke column, welcome to enjoy!

Humor jokes Daquan funny lines (1) 1, Taibai Venus: That monkey, you fly slowly, respect the old and love the young, fly slowly.

2. the Monkey King: This jade emperor is so far away that he won't send a small one.

3, the axe of the giant spirit god was broken, and I cried. . . The Monkey King: You need weapons. Go to my old neighbor, the Dragon King. . . (Wukong, you can't promote Longsheng like this. . . )

4. Monkey: Tell me, what is an angel? This angel is shit falling from the sky.

5. Monk: Our grandmaster is a great monk in this field and won't meet people easily.

The Monkey King: Cut! Is he inlaid with gold or plated with silver? It's so ugly!

6. Pig Bajie: You are forcing a good husband!

7. Marshal Tian Peng: I am Marshal Tian Peng, who is in charge of the 80,000-day army. Did you hear me clearly? I don't know how to count. Eighty thousand, eighty thousand, you don't know how to count!

The Monkey King: It's too thick and too long. It is a good baby.

9. Xianjia:? An unreliable person has three eyes? .

10, Cuilan Dialogue Pig Bajie: Now everyone in the village knows that you are a pig!

Funny lines in humorous jokes (2) 1 episode 1 Feng Tiankui's speech at the meeting on the establishment of the army, navy and air force;

All of you were present. Stand and listen. Did all of you attend the meeting?

Well, about eight out of seven.

Those who haven't arrived, can you raise your hand for me?

(There is laughter below. . . )

Hey. . . Ha ha. . . Everybody's here. . . You came here in great luxury.

Give my brother face, brother. I have a cold.

Brother, what's the purpose of calling everyone here today?

It's all about building up the armed forces.

Brother, I am a lout and don't know anything, so if there is anything wrong with what I said today, please invite all of you. . . Forgive each other

Brothers can't compare with you. Many of you rabble can read. They all climbed out of the pen container.

Dude, I climbed out of the bucket. That's why talking to you is like that. . . Ha ha. . . Play the lute to a cow.

(A plane flies by)

Look, this is my brave air force.

Committee member Jiang was supposed to come to today's inaugural meeting, but his old man's house has been a little bored recently. I heard that the Japanese did it, so I forgave him. Who let him be my uncle? Uncle didn't come. Commander-in-Chief Liu was Sir Zhong, but as luck would have it, Sir Zhong had loose bowels today and washed away all their toilets. Sir Zhong is busy repairing their toilets at the moment, so he won't care about us. So, I have to wronged my brother myself.

Why did you set up this naval and army service? Because I really don't understand something.

Foreigners Foreigners have set up embassies in People's Lane in the eastern suburbs of Beiping, but they are short of those in China.

Why didn't China build an embassy there? This is because we in China are too weak, so we should strengthen our army.

The chairman is afraid of the Japanese, so it is our duty to help him stand up.

2. Are the brothers happy

Do you feel good?

Guys, do you want to do it again?

ask

3. Feng Tiankui: A few days ago, the Commissioner tested me with a word, loyalty.

I said it was a woman and her children.

Why did the Committee say?

I said that the child in the belly of loyalty is your own, and infidelity, this child belongs to others.

The Committee's face slammed down and left.

4. Feng Tiankui: It is said that the British are very graceful. You are not as good as me.

Sir Langdon: It's not shit, it's jazz. Don't talk nonsense, okay

Feng Tiankui: No matter what shit it is, it is shit anyway, but you shit, you really have to thank me for this shit.

Feng Tiankui: I know the capital of your country. Isn't there not enough holes in the toilet? Right?

Funny lines in humorous paragraphs (3) 1. Don't engage in porcelain without Jin Gangzuan, and don't wear short skirts without a golden hoop.

2、? Mom, you know tennis. ?

? Of course, I especially like Deng Yaping. ?

3、? There is a thread in this ring! ? I know. Made in China? ! ?

4. Bartender: How do you get along?

Guan Gu: It can be described in four words.

Bartender: Love at first sight.

Guan Gu: It's none of your business.

5、? Amputation is an operation that can't have children. ?

? This is called ligation. ?

6, as the saying goes, freezing three feet, non-microwave oven can not thaw!

7. How can you say that he is crazy? If he has a brain, too.

8. I agree, I have the final say. If there is any objection, she has the final decision.

9. Why Abby? Because love is crazy and betrayed.

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