What jokes can you tell your girlfriend?

My son is studying at school, and when he comes back, he asks his mother for money. Son: "Mom, give me 3,000 yuan. I need it urgently. " Mom: "What do you need so much money for?" Son: "Nothing, just want to buy a computer." Mom: "Why do you suddenly want to buy a computer?" Son: "I found a mouse pad yesterday and want to match it with a computer."

The lyrics changed from "heart" to "egg". These songs are catchy. 1. Jay Chou: a gentle and lovely woman who makes my eggs ache. 2. Liang Guang: Oh, the first time I said I love you, my breath kept shaking. 3. Richie Jen: You are always too weak. You must bear all the problems by yourself. 4. Andy Lau: I feel sad.

When I was a child, I visited the bookstore, and the light was quite dark that day. Then I heard a child screaming in front of the counter: Aunt, I want to kill the pig myth. I looked at my aunt in horror, and she followed the child's fingers and looked blankly on the shelf. . . Finally, we all saw Greek mythology.

One day, I heard a friend and his cousin quarreling. Cousin said, "Get out!" "Friend:" Well, fuck off and don't call me back! Cousin: I didn't tell you to go straight, I told you to go back and forth! "Roll back and forth. .

A: If someone hurts you, how long will you forgive him? B: It is God's business to forgive him. My task is to send him to God. .

On the plane, a father and daughter. The father is 30 years old and the daughter is 6 to 7 years old. The stewardess is very beautiful, and my father can't help looking at her a few more times. Daughter: "What are you looking at? Do you find it interesting? Why did you do this when my mother was away? " Father blushed: "eat quickly and cut the crap, or I won't take you out in the future!" " "Daughter muttered," I don't understand, my daughter is my father's lover in a previous life. How did I like you in my last life? " ?

The liberal arts girl sent a text message to her boyfriend: "Qingqing Zipei, I miss the dragon, even if I don't go, I won't come." The man replied, "Please use the vernacular ..." The liberal arts woman said, "Fuck you, if I don't come to you, you won't know to come to me ..."