Humorous jokes about depression.

1. When cleaning up qq friends, I found a friend who hasn't moved for three years. The final signature is: since I bought insurance, I don't have to look around when I cross the road?

2, dealing with pharmaceutical companies for many years, listening to the master's words in the pharmaceutical factory, sharing them with everyone, going to the pharmacy to buy medicine, must I kneel down?

The drugs standing in the line of sight are all high commission and average effect, and the good drugs are all below?

Mr. Bao went to the crime scene and investigated for a long time. He didn't find any clues and thought he couldn't be so shameful. what should he do ？ . .

Hesitated for a long time, suddenly Bao's eyes lit up, slowly turned around and asked, What do you think?

4. A woman took her goldfish to the vet.

She said to the vet. I think it has epilepsy. ?

The vet looked at it and said, I think it's quite quiet. ?

The woman said:? I haven't taken it out of the fish tank yet! ?

When Lacey was six years old, she met a blind fortune teller. The blind man touched Laixi's head and predicted with foresight that the child would be a great official in the future!

The whole family was jubilant, and the young mind made up its mind to live up to the fortune teller's expectations.

Years later, Lai was sitting in the backyard of the coffin shop with a spatula in his hand, looking at the direction of the blind man, and said with tears in his eyes, Fuck ~

6、? What to eat today?

? Scrambled eggs with tomatoes. ?

? Why did I scramble eggs again? Tomatoes wronged said

Liu Bei ran away desperately, but when he heard that several ladies were still trapped inside, he couldn't help crying: there will be no more women. what can I do?

Kongming leaned forward and said, Master, don't panic. He has a clever plan.

Liu Bei smiled through tears: Nima, there is a female branch. You didn't say anything earlier!

8. White Dragon is lying in her arms and asks Sha Wujing: Brother Jing, what am I to you?

? You are the most beautiful cloud in my heart?

? Huh? So I'm a cloud?

? Yes, everything is just a cloud. ?

9. Telescope is a great invention left by Galileo.

It's solved in one fell swoop? Far away, what do you think? problem

10, he was ill for many years, kept praying, and finally touched the gods. ? Do you have any wishes?

? I just hope? You may die of natural causes.

? All right, I'll satisfy you. ? After speaking, he began to smoke all over.

1 1, Liu hit it off, and Taoyuan became friends.

Liu Bei suggested: Why not make your own weapons and join the army?

Zhang Fei thought of his fortune and sneered, haha, what a ghost.

I'll report later: Third Master, your spear is ready!

Guan Yu couldn't help laughing after seeing it: I fell!

After a while, I reported again: Sir Zhong is from Shandong, right? Your knife is fine!

12, Xiao Ming: Do you think it's okay to have an abortion three times a month?

Xiao Qiang:? Your girlfriend? ! ?

Xiaoming:? No. This is my bike. ?

13, in the evening room, Bai Yutang led Zhan Zhao to the bed. Kate, come with me. ?

Zhan Zhao noodles have be reluctant:? It's not dark yet. ?

Lord Bao passed by the door and overheard this passage. He immediately put his whole face on the enough paper. Come on, young man, the government can only help here.

14, Di Renjie and Li Yuanfang are camping on the hillside!

At night, Di Renjie woke up and woke Fiona Fang: "Look, Fiona Fang!" ! What is in the sky?

Fiona Fang: A bright moon!

Di Renjie: What do you think of this?

Fiona Fang thought for a moment, then said: Well, the moonlight is fine, there are no stars, and it should be cloudy tomorrow!

Dee Renjie: Idiot! Our tent was stolen!

Bao Zheng: Don't take it personally. The tent is still there! it is me ......

15, friend's signature:? I don't say, you don't understand. This is the distance between us. ? What a poetic sentence!

Someone commented below:? This is a love story between a mute and an idiot. ?

16. Once upon a time, there was a man named KFC. Wherever he goes, there is a man named MacDonald everywhere. And then they used it? Gay? To describe this intimate relationship.

17. When Bao Zheng Jr. was born, there was a crescent on his forehead. Suddenly one day, the crescent moon turned into a full moon. Little Bao Zheng's mother counted with her fingers. It turns out that Bao Zheng Jr. is full moon today. . .

Then one day, Bao Zheng's mother saw that the moon was gone, sighed, took out a needle and carved four words, patted Bao Zheng on the shoulder and said? Now that the moon has flown away, you can serve your country faithfully.

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