Small classroom of Chinese medicine parenting knowledge: Do children need to intervene if they can't leave their mouths?

"No, no, it tastes terrible, like Baba!"

"Smelly, did someone fart?"

"ah! The sound of this faucet is the same as peeing! "

Many parents have had similar experiences. At a certain age, babies will talk about "shit and fart" all day long and take pleasure in it. Lovely children's voice is like an uncontrolled megaphone, spreading these indecent words everywhere. At this time, adults around them are often in a very embarrassing situation and don't know what to do. In fact, parents need to understand first that it is a normal phenomenon for a baby to talk about "shit and fart". Babies of different ages are keen to say "shit fart" for different reasons.

1 This is their special "exploring way"

When they hear "shit and fart", their parents' embarrassing reaction, which is hard to hide, can arouse their curiosity, make them willing to continue to say these words, and use them as a tool to explore language boundaries, so as to know which words will cause the other party's reaction.

coping style:

dispelling the particularity of shit and fart with a normal mind

The reason why adults are afraid to say these words is because they have been labeled as "filthy", "uncivilized" and "dirty" in their minds, and they think it is "impolite" to say them. But in the world of young babies, these words don't have any colored labels. They regard "shit and fart" as the same thing as their own "hands and feet", so they blurt it out without any taboo. This is the so-called "children's words are unscrupulous".

For babies who love to say "shit and fart", parents need to deal with them with a normal attitude and don't have to respond to these words specially. Especially when the baby speaks these words in public, he must not express strong emotions. He should calmly tell the baby that it is not appropriate to say so. In addition, you can use some popular science books, such as "Lababa" and "Who is on my head", to introduce the knowledge about excreta to your baby and answer your baby's doubts positively. Over time, when the baby really understands the meaning and applicable context of these words, it will not deliberately say these words at an inappropriate time.

2 This is their "game and social way"

Generally speaking, the indecent words that parents hear from older children are usually different from those of babbling babies. Older children's "shit fart" is often more creative. They will adapt such words into various catchy children's songs and jokes and sing them among classmates and playmates.

This is because children aged 2.5-6 years old are in the critical period of the development of social norms and begin to like making friends and participating in group activities. Through socialization, children's language expression ability has improved compared with when they were younger. Their daily slapstick amusement is not limited to physical movements, but extends to language.

At this time, language such as "shit and fart" is a very suitable social tool for them. Adapting and "spoofing", and even saying some indecent words to each other, for children, mainly because they feel fun. We can understand it as a slapstick game in language.

Coping style:

Integrating into children's language games, positive guidance

Politeness and upbringing are of course important. However, just because children at a certain stage are happy to say these words doesn't mean they are impolite. Just like adults, they are polite in public, but in private at home, or with good friends, they will inevitably make jokes.

In fact, most children will also consider the situation and objects when playing such games, and they will not be completely indifferent to the occasion. For example, parents will find that when their children are keen to say "shit and fart", many playmates of the same age around Ta like to play like this, but children rarely say these words in front of teachers. At this time, to stop it in a rude way has hindered their normal social interaction and hit their "creative desire."

In the process of "verbal slapstick", the main purpose of most children is not to attack others, but to show their creativity. Based on this, what parents should do is to mention some children at the right time, so that they can talk to them positively about these words, and at the same time, let them not use these words to maliciously humiliate others. Parents can even try to join the children's "shit and fart" forum, so that they can better guide them and tell them when they are joking. It can be said that it is inappropriate to say these things on any occasion.

In addition, children around the age of 6 already have a general idea of the rules of the world, even if they occasionally use inappropriate words on certain occasions, they will often understand them after being calmly stopped and criticized. This process is also an opportunity for children to further understand social norms and adjust their behavior, which is a very good learning experience.

"Write at the end"-

As mentioned above, words like "shit and fart" have completely different cultural meanings and specific functions from those of adults in children's world. Therefore, if parents want to guide their babies, they need to understand the children's language style, accept and admit this difference, and then try to understand the reasons and significance behind it.

Not only that, parents need to find the source of all the seemingly "incomprehensible" behaviors of their children first, instead of simply and rudely denying them, so as to become intimate partners on their children's growth path and accompany them to "better themselves".