Seek the classic sentence in Chang 'an Luan, which is both Zen and funny!

Master said: The feelings between men and women, because they are not specific, will dissipate, so they are called the world of mortals. You and joy are not feelings between men and women, but sustenance. Entrustment is not necessarily bad, and it is often more important than the relationship between men and women.

2.

Can I go home often after I leave?

I can't.

Why?

I can't go far if I want to go home.

So I can't even see Master?

Don't be embarrassed, I happen to be your master. Remember, when you feel that a person can't die, you just feel that this person happens to be this person, that's all. For example, after joy died, you were like, joy just happened to be my woman, that's all.

Is everything just right?

No, everything is called unknown before it happens, and you want to call it unknown immediately after it happens.

So none of this is meant to be?

Destiny is predestined, and fate cannot be changed. It is just an adjective.

3.

First of all, I am responsible for some small things.

Second, I will decide what is small and what is big.

four

That day, Master left Shi Kong behind, and Joy and I went out first. When I discuss with Joy that Master should be blaming and releasing emptiness, it's not necessarily true that Joy says so.

The result was really unexpected. Shaolin Temple decided to mass-produce flying hooks to raise funds and expand the temple. I doubt it. Can I sell it for money? Joy said she would definitely sell it. As a result, you can really sell money. It is found that this kind of flying hook can be used for everything except flying. Children use it to climb trees, women use it to tie children, and they use it to tie their dogs. Three or four hooks can also be used to weed farmland, and pork sellers can be used to hang pork. When the carriage breaks down, it can also be used as a tow rope. In short, it is awesome. In addition, it is produced by Shaolin, and its reputation is guaranteed, so it sells well.

It was sold for about a week, and suddenly a 96-year-old man was playing drums in the yamen, saying that the flying hook was not invented by Shaolin, but was successfully experimented by the previous dynasty. Although there is no mass production, it has been traded underground, and even caused a wall climbing fever. Now Shaolin stole it. I hope Shaolin can apologize for compensation and give the eldest son a good reputation.

The examiner asked: You said that the flying hook was invented by you. Why are you testifying?

The old man said: you are still young and don't understand the history at that time. Hooks were popular among many chivalrous people at that time. You can ask your predecessors without reading history books.

The examiner asked: What did you do before?

The old man said: Right people used to be housewives.

The examiner asked: What did you do?

The old man said: I have made this hook all my life. But then the eaves and roofs changed, and my hooks were useless.

Later, things spread to Shaolin, and Shaolin basically stopped going to people, so it was settled. As a result, the yamen thought that because Shaolin's flying hook sold millions, the old man's previous climbing hook only sold about 6000, so it did not constitute infringement. Although their shapes are basically the same, they are judged as two species because of their different names. The purpose of the old man was to change the law number of his relatives and was sentenced to false accusation. Moreover, although Shaolin mass production hooks sell money, they are not for profit, but for building temples. The old man's move constitutes blasphemy. However, if you think the old man is old, you can be exempted from punishment and displayed in the South Square for half a day.

five

Pushing open the door, Joey and I walked into the street, and there was no one around. It was afternoon, and I was very sleepy. Walking around, I found that many people were in a hurry. Joy said: Is it serious?

I said, no.

We crossed a street and came to a teahouse. We found many people gathered inside, so we went in. Found a middle-aged man on a table is vividly describing things outside:

It's a mess outside My eldest brother is in charge of the beauty development of Shaolin Temple. He took people to see it and studied how to do it. I went with him. When I got there, I knocked on the door for a long time, but nothing happened. I think this is wrong. My eldest brother is a martial arts student, and he can fly straight with one foot. As a result, you don't know which wall of Shaolin is higher, but he didn't fly. Then he opened the door with a trick. Look at that.

Joy said, wasn't the door blown open?

I said, you also believe that we jumped the fence when we were young.

When everyone heard that everyone was dead, they couldn't help whispering: I think it was the competitor who recruited the door a few months ago.

Others said: I think there must be a mole, killing one by one in the middle of the night while people are sleeping.

Someone immediately objected: impossible, when will they be killed one by one? Have you ever been to a temple? It's dawn. You haven't finished killing.

Everyone thinks it makes sense and agrees that it is impossible to kill one by one. what do you think?

Opponents said: it must have been killed with one hand and one sword, two by two.

There is another discussion below: two of them may not be finished before dawn.

Some people say: nonsense, how can two people kill each other without waking people up and being poisoned?

Immediately, there was a discussion, saying that if it was poisoned, it would be lost first.

There is an echo in it. An old man said slowly, not necessarily. Shaolin has a place specializing in poison and detoxification. Even though rice is poisonous, not everyone can eat it.

Some people say: you must be a vegetarian for a long time and get no nutrition.

The person next to him immediately said, nonsense, my old Han, the village head of the village, is from a poor family. He digs wild vegetables and weeds to eat every day, and people grow stronger and stronger. Well, he is getting better and better, and he runs faster than a wild rabbit.

The crowd came crashing down and said, brag, running faster than wild rabbits. Why didn't the old man catch wild rabbits to eat?

The man said: I want to talk about the catastrophe eight years ago. The old man did not starve to death. As a result, he was mentally ill, convulsed and kowtowed every day, and his life was saved. He can't bend over, so he runs very fast and can't bend over to catch rabbits. He is a vegetarian.

They said: the elderly are also having a hard time. He runs with rabbits every day, but he just can't eat.

The man said: Yes, there are a lot of wild rabbits this year, jumping around like locusts after the plague, and no one wants to sell them in the city.

Everyone said, why doesn't anyone want it? The South Game Hall specializes in collecting wild goods. Why do rabbits always sell more than melons?

Some people disagree, saying: not necessarily, in the year of catastrophe, melons are not allowed to be sold on the street, and melons are stinky. Later, all the melons were sad. Guess what happened after the melons were sad?

Everyone asked: What?

The man said: the melon farmer was sad and stopped planting melons. That year, melons rotted in the ground, and the next year, most people stopped planting melons. As a result, people in the city didn't eat melons for a year, and after another year, they especially wanted to eat melons. Melons are rare and sell well. When it is expensive, a chicken and a melon are the same price.

Everyone nodded and said, yes, one year. Later, everyone planted melons and no one raised chickens. In the second year, a chicken can be exchanged for a hundred melons.

Everyone sighs: The world is getting faster and faster, but which is more valuable, the wild rabbit or the melon?

A man jumped out and said: I have eaten wild rabbits, which are sour and tender and not delicious.

Another one jumped out and said, nonsense, that's the old wild rabbit you ate. Have you ever eaten a small one?

The storyteller was unhappy and shouted, Don't listen. Later, a great warrior appeared and killed all the Shaolin killers at once. Will you listen?

Joey shouted, listen, listen.

The man went on to say: Later, when I went to Sha, I heard a wonderful thing. It turned out that Shaolin was killed by the masters sent by other major enemy gangs, including Zhang Fuxiong, the first leg in the desert, the first cow and three babies in Wudang hidden weapons, and Tan Zhuangzhuang, who is known as the first strongman of Taurus, and so on. Countless times, they drank and boasted in restaurants, and a teenager brought a sword. The destruction of Shaolin touched the Buddha, who sent a lantern bearer down. Magic soldiers descended from heaven. They are drinking on the second floor. The man didn't come from the first floor, but went straight down from the sky to the second floor and dug a hole.

Everyone was in an uproar.

The man said, of course, the forty people don't know. They said they would fight, but they didn't. Forty people died.

People don't believe it: nonsense, how to kill people without starting work.

The man said, idiot, move the sword. Didn't you say that man had a sword? That sword is used in the sky, cutting the ground and cutting the mountain. Look at Taihang Mountain. It was all cut with that sword.

They said, "Forty people can't do it.

The man said, yes, that sword cuts diamonds like melons.

Everyone is amazed: peel the melon! How easy it is to peel melons.

The man said, yes, it's like peeling a melon. I won't lie to you. I saw the crack in the big pillar.

Some people say: diamonds are hard, nothing can be opened, and melons are easy to cut.

Others objected, saying: nonsense, there are several kinds. The melons grown in our Hugua village are not easy to peel, and the skin is hard and the meat is sweet. Special varieties have been presented to the emperor.

Others say: man is the sword in the sky.

The man said: everyone says this melon is a melon in the sky. That was 18 years ago, the gods in the sky accidentally ate the melon, spit out the melon seeds and spit them on the ground. They also planted this kind of melon in the old man's field in Cunhu. Unlike the melons you have seen, they all fell from the sky and should not be cut into each other.

Some people object, saying: nonsense, people are all things on the ground, don't they all kill each other?

Others said: Did your melon harvest well this year?

The man said, forget it. Melon is so quiet. It should grow slowly. Somehow, there are a lot of wild rabbits this year, and they have been jumping around on the vines, making the melons grow badly.

Some people say that melons can't sell for a long time.

An old man pinched his beard and said, you don't know. Strange goods can live, and the price will be high without melons.

Some people say that the height is not as high as the chicken nine years ago.

Someone suggested: at least the same price as wild rabbits.

Some people say: Bullshit, living is definitely more expensive than dying.

Some people say: nonsense, wild rabbits are worthless. all over the ground

Some people say: wild rabbits are hard to catch.

Some people say: it's hard to catch, but it tastes bad.

At some point, the two sides representing Guagua and Rabbit quarreled and refused to give up. They all listed why rabbits are expensive or melons are expensive, and they all blushed. The party who said that wild rabbits were expensive said that a person in the melon and fruit gang suddenly stood up, did not know where to draw a knife, and shouted, I will say that it is melons and fruits, and whoever sells wild rabbits is expensive, I will cut him down.

Then everyone was in chaos, drawing swords, drawing swords, fighting for benches, and killing each other into a ball. Joy had nothing to do with myself, so I immediately withdrew from the store to wait and see. It's unprecedented chaos. Dozens of people and ten kinds of weapons are in a ball. Because I didn't know in advance, I didn't know who was who after the camp was chaotic. It is inevitable that some people who think rabbits are expensive have beaten people for a long time. Before he died, the man said, You killed me and I said rabbits are expensive. Under such circumstances, I had to bite the bullet and beat the man to death. After the fight, everyone was red-eyed, but still rational. Before the fight, they asked: rabbit or melon? You don't do it until you find a disagreement. A rabbit asked a stranger if it was expensive: a rabbit or a melon. The man wanted to say, how can melons be more expensive than rabbits? No sooner had he finished a sentence than he was knocked unconscious by a bench. The scene was terrible, indicating that you should not pay too much attention to modification when you speak at the key time. At the end of the battle, the injured, the dead and the unconscious were all on the ground, leaving only one who felt that melon was expensive to stand. The man climbed onto the table, trying to say something, and found himself confused. He can't remember whether his position is expensive for rabbits or melons, which is very painful. He suddenly recognized a guy who was dying, so he thought that if he asked the man what his position was, he would naturally know his position. The man's initial position was that rabbits were expensive. When he saw his enemy coming again, he wanted to pretend to be one of his own with the strong man to save his life. He was so scared that he changed his mouth and said, melons are expensive. The man laughed, knocked him unconscious with one punch, jumped on the stage again and shouted at the injured person: Haha, rabbits are still expensive!

At this time, a melon with a broken hand and foot appeared below. He recognized the man on the table and knew that there was something wrong with his position. He suggested, brother, you are wrong. It is very expensive.

The consequence is naturally that the speaker was killed by a knife. Joy and I were dumbfounded.

six

The difference between Buddha and Tao is that if you kill me, you will cross over, and if you can't kill me, I will cross over. But in fact, no one wants to be killed, and they all want to stay in that miserable world because they are still familiar with each other.