A kind daughter who is far away from home: Mom, don't be silly. Be nice to your sister-in-law and be happy when you get old, don't you think?

Every mother is like this. She wears a lot of emotional filters when she looks after the children. Even if her children are not so good, they are still the best in the world in the eyes of her mother.

This is the trust and kindness that a mother gives to her children alone.

The word mother, in most cases of life, represents dedication and selflessness. Although most mothers may have imperfections, they must still love their children wholeheartedly from the heart.

There is nothing wrong with loving children, but if children grow up gradually, mothers should indulge their words and deeds with this childhood thought, rather than measure them with the eyes of adults. Then sooner or later, it will bring many negative effects to children.

Especially after the children get married. If it is a son, it will generally be reflected in the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

Although people nowadays are emphasizing that sons and daughters have the same views. However, you can't deny that in the eyes of our parents' generation, there is indeed a difference between sons and daughters. If you don't believe me, go to life and see how many parents still hold the idea of "marrying a daughter and splashing water". There must be many.

They are not saying that they will prefer boys to girls, but they will definitely favor their sons in the key choice.

For example, buying a house, as long as it is a son, most parents subconsciously feel that buying a house for their son is a matter of course, but the daughter will not, because there will be a house for the man after marriage.

This is a product of the times and a deep-rooted concept, which will not be changed for a while.

Therefore, most parents who have this idea think that their son's wife is a newcomer in his own family and he is still a parent.

But at the same time, they will not really treat their daughter-in-law as a daughter, and it is impossible in their hearts to say it well. This is normal. Blood relationship itself is a close bond. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are two strangers. Because people of the same sex walk together, how can they be as close as mother and daughter?

02

A year ago, a girl chatted with me about the changes after her mother became a mother-in-law. She always feels very headache.

She said that her mother was not the kind of mother-in-law who would deliberately embarrass her daughter-in-law, but she still found fault with her sister-in-law everywhere in the details of her life. However, if she doesn't do well at all, her mother will spit on her and say how her sister-in-law is, and she is very uncomfortable.

When her mother talks about it, she always has that indignant tone. Even if my sister-in-law doesn't clean the room one day, or sleeps late all day, or her sister-in-law asks her brother to wash dishes and cook, and she watches TV on the sofa, these little things may become nails in her mother's eyes.

Also, if her sister-in-law spends more money, her mother will be dissatisfied, think that she is wasting, think that her son earns hard-earned money, think that she doesn't keep the house, and so on.

Anyway, surfing the Internet is really easy. Even if it is a small mistake, my mother will take the accident as a habit and think that this daughter-in-law is not good enough.

Her mother also likes to compare secretly, comparing the good of this daughter-in-law with the bad of her own daughter-in-law, and then complaining.

Of course, if my sister-in-law does something good one day, her mother will be happy, too. For example, on Mother's Day, my sister-in-law bought a dress for her mother and sent a message to wish her a happy holiday. Her mother said to her happily, "This time she is sensible and bought me clothes."

But every two days, her mother will start to vomit again, or those little things that are as big as sesame seeds and mung beans, and her mother will be very dissatisfied and say that she is not a qualified daughter-in-law.

In the long run, so repeatedly.

In her mother's eyes, the daughter-in-law, who is lazy, not sensible, loves spending money and doesn't like housework, doesn't take good care of her son.

03

There are so many dissatisfaction in my heart, and sometimes it will inevitably show up on my face if I can't control it well. After a long time, her sister-in-law must have noticed it in her heart.

Once, her sister-in-law asked her, "Why do I feel that my mother has a little problem with me, and sometimes she is very picky about my appearance, and I don't know what is going on?"

She can only say that she must be thinking too much. Sometimes her mother may not speak well, and it's the same for their children, but she has no bad ideas, let alone a problem with her.

Her sister-in-law nodded and said she hoped so.

She realized that she couldn't do this, so when her mother talked to her later, she always stood on the side of her sister-in-law, consciously or unconsciously, helped her speak, and earnestly helped to persuade: "Mom, don't be silly, be nice to her sister-in-law, and be happy when you get old."

However, if she takes the side of her sister-in-law, her mother will always get angry and think that she is turning her elbow outward, just like her son.

She still sticks to her opinion.

She has a good relationship with her sister-in-law. They are only one year apart, and they still have a lot to say. She is a long-married woman, and she usually doesn't have much time to go back. Every time I go back, my sister-in-law picks her up and cooks for her at the first time.

It takes her more time to go back to her sister-in-law's house than herself. In her opinion, sister-in-law is a very cheerful person, especially atmospheric, without any small thoughts, and kind and opinionated, with higher education than her younger brother and good looks. It is a great achievement for my brother to get such a wife.

After all, she thinks her brother has more shortcomings than others. Miraculously, after getting married, my sister-in-law can completely control her younger brother, but she has turned her previously unreasonable younger brother into a person who loves her family and works hard, and listens a lot more than before.

She said that her brother was very self-centered before he got married and was spoiled by his parents. He has no empathy, and sometimes he really makes people angry and doesn't apologize. After marriage, I have changed a lot and become a lot of filial piety. Even when I have nothing to do, I will call her and care about her recent situation.

With this, she thinks that her sister-in-law has made great contributions.

Because their family can't manage their younger brother together, her sister-in-law did it alone, so it's like marrying a wife. She asked herself if she didn't have this emotional intelligence.

04

But that's all. Her mother will still be picky and show her face to her sister-in-law On the one hand, she was happy with her son's change, saying that he was sensible after marriage, on the other hand, she completely ignored the role played by her daughter-in-law, as if her son had suddenly grown up.

She is the daughter of her mother and the daughter-in-law of others. It is not easy to understand this role deeply. She and her mother-in-law also have some minor conflicts. Although it is not torn, there is always a knot in my heart.

So, the more she understood, it was not easy for her sister-in-law.

She really doesn't understand her mother's thoughts. Obviously, her brother listens to his wife, and this is the only son in the family. As a daughter, she will definitely need more help from her younger brother and sister-in-law when she is married far away.

Mom doesn't want to please, but she can't be so targeted everywhere. A good-natured person like her sister-in-law can see that. So sometimes her mother talks too much.

Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, daughter-in-law should not be the imaginary enemy of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. The relationship between two people should be * * * and cooperation.

As the old saying goes, how many people can really grow old together without children? Theory is one thing, practice is another. At least what I see around me is that many mothers-in-law are taken care of by their daughters-in-law when they are old and sick. And those who don't want to, mostly because when I was young, I met difficulties with my mother-in-law.

I also met some old mothers-in-law who wanted to bury the hatchet with their daughter-in-law, but the daughter-in-law didn't want to, because at that time, her mother-in-law's good fortune might be a burden to her daughter-in-law, which was completely unnecessary. Often, only by giving charcoal in the snow can we show real affection.

Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, you can respect each other, and you don't have to be as close as mother and daughter. This is fantasy. I can try to understand, be less embarrassed and respect each other. I believe that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will not be too bad in the end.