What is the experience of being a handsome boy who grew up in a poor family?

Never asked for any pocket money, never had a birthday party, first time I drank milk tea in high school, first time I graduated from high school, first time I watched a movie at a university, first time I ate fruit at KFC University. In fact, there are many people like me in third-and fourth-tier cities. In high school, I never drank. I like playing basketball. Every time I come back, there are more chocolates and drinks on the table. Send it back, a look of want to cry, but have to share it with my deskmate. In college, a sister took a taxi to our school for tens of dollars and sent me a cake specially. The cake without cream is particularly soft and melts in the mouth. It's hard to say what to call it. Before, I only ate the egg cake with special dry steamed bread at home. At that time, I felt for the first time that there was such a delicious cake! I decisively shared it with the whole class and showed them the world. It was my sister who took me to steak for the first time. At that time, she had already paid for it (covering her face). I can't eat steak well, and sitting there is also fidgeting, for fear of exposing my rustic temperament. It seems that I am tall, handsome and neatly dressed. I should have gone in and out there without any sense of disobedience, but in fact I don't belong there. I prefer and am more used to squatting on the curb and eating barbecue. "Not worthy" and "disappointing" are two key emotional issues. Therefore, even if I fall in love, I will be very tired and cautious. I am also afraid of getting hurt, so I have developed a habit of "never taking love too seriously." Someone in Zhihu once said, "People who feel inferior don't deserve love." So, don't look for me when looking for a boyfriend.