Family jokes

Family jokes 1:

1, power can really change a person. My mother used to be very good, cleaning tables and washing dishes. Now that he is in power, the whole person has changed.

Just after dinner, I pushed the bowl and let me stand behind her with my coat and put it on. When I walked to the door, I slowly tilted my head and said to me, kneel down, my mother went to lead the dance.

Daughter: Mom, I'll buy you a vacuum cleaner, so you don't have to bend over to sweep the floor.

Mom: Don't waste money.

Daughter: Then I'll buy you a dishwasher to save you the trouble.

Mom: Don't waste money.

Daughter: What do you want?

Mom: Nothing. Your father can do all these jobs.

3. The desk lamp at home is broken. Grandpa fixed it all afternoon, but grandma said, Why don't you eat first and I'll see what it looks like. ?

After a while, my grandmother came out with a black line on her face, saying that the light bulb was broken.

Mom changed a light bulb, but it still doesn't work. Dad ran to the property, but the power went out.

4、? Dad? Mom? How did I get here? Xiao Ming asked with wide vacant eyes.

Dad coughed and said, you son of a bitch. Don't you remember? Last night, you quarreled with your daughter-in-law, went out and got drunk, and then strolled back! ?

5. A friend likes playing computer. His mother saw his lack of progress, so he spent a long time on education. The buddy stared at the computer without saying a word. Suddenly, he saw that his video had been reprinted over ten thousand times, and he excitedly said to his mother. Mom, stop it, I'm getting angry! ?

Give it a fucking slap: It's not good for you ?

Family jokes 2:

1, my daughter asked my father, what is love, and my father said: Love means that my father has nothing, but my mother still married my father. ?

The daughter asked what affection was, and the father said? Affection means that mom will never let you marry a man with nothing. ?

It is said that the father heard that his daughter had a boyfriend for the first time, just like the farmer's uncle worked hard to grow a season of cabbage and was arched by a pig.

The first time a father heard that his son had a girlfriend, it felt like a hard-working pig could finally bow his head to eat cabbage.

3. The process of father's education of children. When you were a child, you loved to run around. Dad wanted to spell you like Tang Priest.

Primary school fell in love with the internet, skipping classes and going to Internet cafes! I really wish I had hit you with a golden hoop, the Monkey King, because my father advocates stick education.

After a confused childhood, you know the importance of learning, but the shortcomings in learning are exposed. Dad wants to learn from Pig Eight Rings and pick out your shortcomings with a nine-toothed rake.

You have entered high school, and your study task is extremely heavy. Dad wants to be a sand monk to shoulder the heavy responsibility for you.

Well, when you go to an institution of higher learning, dad wants you to learn from the scriptures.

4. What is a mother?

Mom just gave up her figure and left a scar!

Eat and drink Lazar!

No movies, no flowers!

Go home from work! When I see the bed, I want to lie down!

Bitter and tired, no one praises!

Goodbye youth, and her!

Smile when you see the baby!

What's a dad?

Dad just teases you in his spare time,

You can't coax it when you cry,

Sit still and eat,

When you pull, you twitter,

Give it to mom when it's noisy,

Hide on the sofa while sleeping. . .

Cell phones, computers, yes,

Open your mouth and shut your mouth, especially Eva!

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