Mandarin short stories

Once upon a time, there was an island where Chinese, German, English and other languages lived. Suddenly one day, all the languages decided to leave the island and go outside.

Soon, all languages landed. Ah, the outside world is really beautiful: there are tall buildings, tall and straight trees, bright flowers and lovely animals ... watching, all languages are separated, but it doesn't matter, those people are very enthusiastic, so all languages will soon have a place to live. English spread to England, French to France and Japanese to Japan. Germans settled in Germany ... but Chinese in China split into two parts, and dialects and Putonghua appeared.

One day a few years later, dialect and Mandarin came together. Dialects call names when they meet Mandarin for no reason, but Mandarin bows greatly and asks, "Dialect buddy, how are you recently?" Seeing this, the dialect is not ashamed, but proudly replies, "I'm so busy recently. Who told me to be so popular? " Everyone talks about me. ""really? " "Don't believe it, let's compare." "good! "Mandarin confidently replied," Why not invite people from other languages to be judges? " "All right!" Dialect readily agreed. They found other languages to judge them.

At the beginning of the competition, the judges said, "You two introduce yourselves." Dialect spoke: "Hello, my name is Dialect, which is a very popular language. When people speak, it is me-dialect. I'm ordinary, and everyone will say, stop learning, and you'll understand as soon as you listen ... ""No! Don't! No! " English says in nonstandard Chinese, "I don't agree with you, because I can't understand most of what you said." "yes! Right! " Other languages speak in unison. Now it's time to speak Mandarin. He stepped onto the stage, adjusted his collar, and then said, "Hello, languages. My name is Mandarin. Although few people talk about me now, I believe that in the near future, I will be a household name and everyone will say it. In fact, speaking Mandarin has many advantages, such as: speaking Mandarin is a sign of politeness and civilization; Also, if you want to swear when you speak Mandarin, you can't swear, because it is possible to swear when you speak dialect, so speaking Mandarin can help people get rid of the bad habit of swearing. Also, if you can't speak Mandarin, you can read some composition books and fairy tales. While reading, I not only increased my knowledge, but also learned to speak Mandarin. If you really can't speak, you often try to speak. It's okay to have fun. Isn't there a saying: smile, it's ten years old. There are countless benefits of speaking Mandarin, so let everyone come to me-Mandarin! " The words sound just fell and thunderous applause rang out from the audience. "In the first game, Mandarin won." The judges said. Followed by the second knowledge contest, the third intelligence contest and the fourth physical contest, Mandarin won. Obviously, Putonghua won a great victory in this competition, so all languages helped to promote Putonghua. Soon, dialects disappeared in China, and naturally, Mandarin became a well-known language.

One day on the bus, people were crowded. The last person who got on the bus managed to squeeze his head and feet in, but his ass was outside the door. As a result, the conductor accidentally caught his ass when he closed the door. I heard the man shout, "I've been arrested, open the door!" " "Although the conductor didn't know what Mao was, he saw that the man's ass was caught and quickly opened the door.

After a while, the conductor asked the man, "What is hair? That's called ass. " "Ass? My place is called Mao. " That man is just. "You are now in Beijing, not in your hometown. Who can understand you? Remember in the future: just the ass. " The conductor is not to be outdone. The man was silent. After about three stops, the bus arrived at Andingmen. The conductor shouted, "The Anding Gate is here, please get off." As soon as the voice fell, the man approached the conductor and said, "You are wrong. You just called ass, why didn't Andingmen call ass door? "

The conductor and the whole bus laughed in surprise.

A foreign tourist entered Beijing for the first time. After a long experience in Beijing Railway Station, he decided to take the bus, the most familiar and cheapest means of transportation, and go to the joint place designated by his friends to build the country.

When you get on the bus, you have to pay a one-yuan fare. But he couldn't find change for a long time, so he had to take out a Qvanxian Zhang ten yuan and say to the conductor, "Jianguomen." Who knows the conductor's elder sister glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. To put it bluntly, she gave him a dirty look and turned to collect money from other passengers.

Our GG, a fool, thought: why don't you charge me? It's not against the rules! So he took a step and overcame all difficulties. Finally, he squeezed into the ticketing elder sister's side, shook his money and said, "Jianguomen!" " This time it was a little louder, which attracted the attention of people around. This ticketing sister is also embarrassed to ignore him. I saw her whoosh, took out a brand-new hundred-dollar bill from her purse, praised our unwavering GG and said loudly, "Did you see it?"

It turns out that our GG's Mandarin is not very standard, and the pronunciation of "Jianguomen" is "Did you see it". No wonder the conductor is angry. Isn't it just a relatively new ten dollars? Small sample, who hasn't seen it! !