Humorous jokes in chemistry class

The following are the articles of humorous jokes in chemistry class that I collected for you. I hope I can help you. If you feel good, you can share it with more friends!

Chapter 1: 1. A and B can be transformed into each other, B can generate C in boiling water, and C can be oxidized in air.

When it becomes D, D smells like rotten eggs. What is ABCD?

Answer: A is a chicken, B is a raw egg, C is a cooked egg, and D is of course a rotten egg!

I met a fellow countryman at the airport one day. He asked me what I was studying abroad, and I said, "Solution chemistry." He said, "You're welcome, man. There is no simple chemical reaction. "

3.？ A man pursues a woman and says: You are H, I am O, and together we are H2O, which is the most stable combination. W: Where is the other H?

4. Is magnesium sulfate soluble? What? The answer is? Fool, I asked if sulfuric acid can beautify your face.

5. Teacher: Can the metathesis reaction produce gold?

Student: Yes.

Teacher: Please write the chemical equation.

Students write: As+Cu=Au+Cs

6. Do you know what a UFO is? Ufo？ Old school! UFO is uranium hypofluoride! ! ! There are such stuffy people, and they say this is a UFO?

7. In a chemistry class in junior high school, the teacher wrote "the nature relationship between cations and anions" on the blackboard, but the teacher accidentally missed the nature of "quality". As a result, the characters "Sexual relationship between cations and anions" were displayed on the blackboard, and the whole class fainted, especially a girl in the front row who was lying on the table and smiled for half a class.

Humorous jokes in chemistry class Part II: 1 Exam cloud: ABCD four substances, AB can be transformed into each other, and B can be heated to generate solid C and D. If B is left for a long time, D has it.

Smells like rotten eggs. Ask what ABCD is.

Answer: A is a chicken, B is an egg, C is a cooked egg, and D is a rotten egg.

Do you know what happens when concentrated nitric acid is poured into the toilet?

——3WC+ 10 HNO 3-& gt； 3H2WO4+ 10NO+3CO2+2H2O

It is known that water bath is used for heating and oil bath is used above;

3. If you are too lively, girls in chemistry department will think that your entropy changes too much;

If you are in love, chemistry girls will think that phenylalanine is at work;

If you want to replenish blood, the chemistry girl will advise you to swallow a small piece of iron, because iron reacts with HCl in the stomach to generate divalent iron ions.

Can replenish blood;

4. The girls in chemistry department have strong hands-on ability, because they often set up various experimental devices in the laboratory;

Female students in chemistry department are very courageous because they often deal with toxic and harmful drugs in the laboratory;

Female students in chemistry department are very sensitive because they must pay attention to the progress of various chemical reactions;

The female students in chemistry department are very observant, because the observation of experimental phenomena exercises their eyes;

The girls in the chemistry department are very cute because they are looking for constant promises in the laboratory.

Chemistry department girls are persistent because they believe in constant commitment; Don't believe me, then the boy across the street looks over!

7 iron and gold

The teacher asked the students, "Kid, what will happen if a piece of iron is left in the yard for a long time?"

"There will be a layer of rust on it."

"By the way, what if it's a piece of gold?"

"That's long gone."

Two-part allegorical saying: benzene ring hangs hydroxyl-you pretend to be pure (alcohol).

Aluminum is soluble to the person you like.

10 teacher: can the double decomposition reaction produce gold?

Student: Yes.

Teacher: Please write the chemical equation.

Students write: As+Cu = = = Au+CS.

The sodium metal in the laboratory caught fire yesterday. In order to put out the fire, the water in the laboratory was almost used up?

12 In the chemistry class in senior high school, the teacher was talking about the characteristics of bromine and asking questions. Who knows how to save it? Then a bee flew in.

Please, it fell on the neck of the boy behind me. The boy panicked and called "bee, bee". The teacher was overjoyed and struck the table.

Yes, it's sealed.

13 I poured mercury into concentrated sulfuric acid, because concentrated sulfuric acid was dehydrated, so mercury became silver!

A chemist, a physicist and a geologist are walking along the beach.

Suddenly, the physicist said he wanted to measure the depth of the sea and jumped into it.

The geologist said he wanted to see the bottom of the sea, and then he jumped.

The chemist waited for a while, but didn't see them, so he came to the conclusion that both physicists and geologists are soluble in seawater.

15 chemistry class begins, and the teacher enters the experimental stage after a theoretical class. Attention, class. The teacher is serious.

He said casually, "I have a silver dollar in my hand." Now I'm going to put it in this cup of sulfuric acid and recall what I just said. "

Content: Will the silver dollar dissolve? "

A voice immediately replied, "No". "Why?" The teacher asked. "If the silver dollar will dissolve, you certainly don't want to put it in sulfuric acid."

16 chemistry teacher: students, in the eyes of us who study chemistry, the world is actually different?

The students are curious.

Chemistry teacher: For example, the classmate in front of me seems to me to be a pile of carbohydrates supported by calcium carbonate?

Are the students cold?

17 "When I first taught, I also talked about sodium. At that time, students were required to operate in the laboratory, but one student

Steal a piece of sodium and put it away? Steal if you say so. The most hateful thing is that he threw sodium into the sewer.

Is it? "

They haven't reacted yet. Throw it into the sewer. What's the matter?

"As a result, I made a whole effort (painting the wall with feces) to blow up the toilet?"

18 Chinese people completed the popularization of chemistry in food.

We know that paraffin comes from rice.

We know the difference between dichlorvos and ham.

We know Sudan red from salted duck eggs and Chili sauce.

We know sulfur from tremella and candied dates.

Understanding copper sulfate from auricularia auricula

Today Sanlu let Chinese people know the chemical function of melamine.

Foreigners become strong by drinking milk.

People in China drink milk stones.

Japanese slogan: a glass of milk a day rejuvenates the nation.

China population figures: A glass of milk a day shocked the whole country.

19 in chemistry class, the teacher asked, "What happens if the doctor gives barium carbonate to the wrong patient?"

The representative of the political department replied that "the doctor should be sentenced and the dean should remember the punishment."

Political lesson problem: Did Shenzhou VI launch successfully? Question 1: What can we learn from it?

A student replied: Shenzhou VI uses hydrazine as fuel and hydrogen peroxide as oxidant. Reflect the formation of nitrogen and water, and release a lot of heat: n2h4+2h2o2 = N2 =+4h2o.

The teacher said: What should I do if I smell gas when I go home?

Students say: be detached and pure.

2 1 element s and element Se, hit a literature.

Go home. Answer: Liu Yuxi

In other words, in one class (about introducing metals), she held a magnesium strip in one hand and an aluminum foil in the other and said, "This is magnesium and this is aluminum, so together it is magnesium and aluminum." In the last two words, the boys in the class shouted together: beauty! )

1, calcium oxide and calcium hydroxide, they are birds of a feather. -What a shocking person!

2. When several reactions are carried out at the same time, the first is acid-base neutralization.

-Typical. Idiom misuse?

3. What is the first reaction when concentrated sulfuric acid splashes on the skin? -Scream, of course!

-Beverage ads?

An experiment was done next class today, which unexpectedly proved that human skin contains carbon.

(refers to the fingers accidentally burned black)

-A moment of silence for you?

5. Put zinc into the solution, which is called "rest assured"!

-So putting zinc in a jar is called "caring"?

6. Does zinc replace iron or copper first? Doesn't it pick soft bullying first? -Another shocking "Chemical Xiehouyu"

7. Are there two solutes in the solution? Are they two species?

-If your English is not good, please don't speak so interesting!

8. Guys, can you hold your little heads up?

-big and small are cute!

9. Is it spring, and some comrades are getting impatient?

-Silent ing? Isn't it shocking enough?

10. It is said that "spring rain is as expensive as oil". Look at these bamboo shoots!

(of boys standing because they can't answer questions)

-Thanks to your thunder!

1 1. Don't ignore me or talk nonsense!

-you are so cute, who is willing to give up!

12. Is it B? Stop teasing me! I didn't bring my calculator today!

-I'm not responsible for this mistake (in fact, I didn't count it)

13. Shh! Let's do something bad today. Stop it! (Pour hydrochloric acid into lime water)

-I'm sorry, did I say it today?

14. It's just potassium salt! Who cares about salt and salt!

-"salt" is not straight, and "salt" is crooked.

15. How many pairs of small eyes are still up?

-Are the eyes that can't be lifted small?

16. (See the handout: "Barium ion is toxic,")-So don't eat it blindly!

(Reading: Barium carbonate will be poisoned by mistake)-Comrades, don't take it too seriously! Give him magnesium sulfate. Laxatives, right? We can't come out of destruction!

-What a precious spirit it is to heal the wounded and rescue the dying!

17. resolutely crack down on reactionaries!

-Patriotic boy!

18. Smart is smart, not blind! It's rare to hear you praise me, blind and smart!

-Hey? I'm a little confused?

19. This is the last time! The final edition!

We are always ready not to let you say it again.

We all know that you don't want to be a Marxist-Leninist old lady!

20. I heard someone shout: Fire! Fire truck! You can call it a train for short.

2 1. Put down your paws!

Yes, it is much more nutritious than pig's trotters! (Lao Zhuang likes to say that students' hands are pig's feet)

(Only when are there penguin claws? )

If you don't stop doing it, kill it first!

-quite crisp and decisive. (speechless)

23. (To Chen Xinyu) Why do you have two hands?

-(Chen Xinyu said very grievance, teacher, I have two hands! ! )

24. "What is the molecular weight of calcium carbonate?" A hundred! "Yes, well, that's what I expect of you!"

25. Can the double decomposition reaction (in Jiangyan soil) be called double decomposition? Yuan Zicheng, can you call him Yuan Zi? (Yuan Zicheng's real name is Yuan Ji, and "Ji" is homophonic with "Zi" in Jiangyan dialect)

Note: Class 6, it says "Wu Zhiqiang, can you call him Wu Zhi?"

Remember, guys, oxygen, silicon, aluminum, iron, calcium, potassium and magnesium. If you can't remember, listen carefully-

Which beauty did the adopted daughter kick?

(Personally, I think the version of Class 6 is funnier, because junior high school chemistry only ranks seventh, so I simply changed it to "which man to kick my daughter to")

27. (Sweep the chemical formula on the blackboard with the blackboard eraser)

Autumn wind sweeps the leaves!

28. Separator funnel? I don't know why people always write "short neck funnel" and "piston funnel". Alas, these children!

Let's assume that the experiment is successful. When her "carbon dioxide gas" fell on the candle, the flame soared and burned her hand.

30. Put your hand into concentrated nitric acid and then neutralize it with sodium hydroxide. Your hand is one size smaller at once.

3 1 The pointer on the balance is biased to the side of "zinc", which is called "eccentricity" for short.

-Who are you talking about?

32. Marry that beauty with a clear heart and a silver and platinum pupil.

-metal activity intensity table

33. "Drop a few drops of copper sulfate solution into sodium hydroxide" (turn around and write "several D's" on the blackboard, point to the blackboard and say "How many D's are these!" )

"One panda head, two panda heads-panda heads and panda heads react to produce small white and white" "

This is a comment on electrolytic water.

We should all have memorized the first 20 bits of the periodic table. This is what our teacher taught us:

Don't touch vegetables (hydrogen, helium, lithium, beryllium and boron)

Don't buy rotten vegetables (carbon, nitrogen, oxygen, neon)

Blueberries should be yours (sodium, magnesium, aluminum, silicon, phosphorus)-this sentence seems not to be the case, I can't remember clearly.

Add calcium (sulfur, chlorine, argon, potassium, calcium) to cattle and donkeys.

I was speechless for a long time when I saw this version, and then I decided (hehe, giggle)-grab a pen and change it!

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