Why don’t people dare to talk about their dreams easily when they reach middle age?

Dream seems to be synonymous with youth, often associated with words such as youth, drive and passion. When people reach middle age, various "mid-life crises" are overwhelming, and some people even suffer from "middle-aged syndrome." At this time, dreams seem to have become a distant luxury. "Talk about life and ideals" has also become a kind of "elegant ridicule" in the adult world.

When chatting with many friends, I indirectly talked about dreams, and all of them were joked back, "It's rare that you still have such drive. Anyway, our life is like this, we can almost see you all at a glance", "You It’s because I drank too much chicken soup, but the society needs progressive young people like you, come on”, “I have no dreams, I’m old, I don’t want to use my brain, I’m too lazy to work”...

I once doubted that I Are you "out of touch" with your contemporaries? Talking about dreams seems to have become a "joke" in everyone's eyes. Come on, we are only in our early 30s, and although we have officially entered the middle-aged class, dreams are something that regardless of age or class.

Think about when we were children, we boldly talked about our dreams: "I want to be a great scientist in the future" and "I want to be a teacher." And in the junior high school graduation classmate list, everyone wrote down their immature but most real dreams at the moment: "Being a singer, actor, host, writer"...

How brave we were at that time, at least we dared to say it boldly. Go out and be fearless. The dream at that time may not be called a dream, it may be just a whim of beautiful yearning, but it also represents the true longing of the heart at that time.

The scary thing is that now we have not only forgotten our original dreams, but have even lost our dreams, and we are just dragging our feet in life day after day.

When we reach middle age, why don’t we dare to talk about our dreams easily? To sum up, there are only the following reasons.

1. Talking about dreaming of space

? A friend once chatted with him about leisure life. He said that when he got home from work, he would play games and then take a shower and go to bed. It goes round and round, living at two o'clock and one line every day. I don't think much about other things, let alone dreams. To him, "What the hell are dreams?"

Some people forget their original intentions while they are still alive, and drift away from their original intentions. In a materialistic society, we have long lost our dreams. If you talk to him about dreams, you may not be able to come up with an answer for a long time, because you don’t know what dreams are. Because he didn't even know that he once had a dream, and maybe it was still contrary to his dream now. It's like we finally become the kind of person we hated the most.

Such people not only don’t know what they want, but also don’t know what they don’t want. They just go with the flow, muddle along, and passively move forward under the crazy push of life. Dreams are just an empty space for them.

2. Talking about dreams is too tiring

What is a dream? Thinking about this complex problem of tracing the source is enough to give people a headache. The life of a middle-aged person is inherently stressful. Every day when you open your eyes, you will see, "There are old people above and young people below. You can't run away without making money; you have endless work and entertainment when you go out, and you have family chores when you come back, which are endless worries; It’s too old to talk about love, it’s too early to talk about death, and all kinds of pressures leave people with nowhere to escape”...

In my opinion, a friend who is very motivated and has great dreams often tells me that I feel inexplicably anxious, especially in the dead of night, when I am lying in bed alone and tossing and turning. I always feel that I have lost my original self as I walk. I am very confused and dare not think about the "great" dream I once had. However, when I woke up the next day, everything seemed fine, and my days went on as usual. She said helplessly that it was better not to think too much, let alone think deeply. Thinking too much would be too tiring, and it would also be tiring for others and yourself.

Therefore, for middle-aged people, talking about dreams is really a tiring thing. If you don’t have the energy and time to talk about dreams, you might as well take some time off from your busy schedule to catch up on TV dramas, play games, and scroll through Douyin and TikTok. The circle of friends can relieve stress. After all, "life is short, have fun in time." Don't always be in trouble with yourself, right?

3. Talking about dreams is too expensive

It’s not that some people don’t have dreams, or that they have forgotten their dreams, but that their dreams are “too expensive” and they dare not think about them, so they can only Choose to remain silent. For example, traveling around the world and the childhood dream of being an artist are all possible at a high price.

For middle-aged people who have to spend every penny wisely, dreams are really a very luxurious thing.

A best friend of mine said that her childhood dream was to learn piano because she felt that girls playing piano on stage were particularly elegant and charming. She thought that she would be able to realize her original dream after working and becoming financially independent. Unexpectedly, now that I have a child, every expenditure must be controlled within the budget, otherwise life will be stretched. Learning piano is so expensive, so I thought about it and forgot about it. I could only carefully treasure my original dream.

4. Talking about dreams is too expensive

The practice of dreams requires a lot of time, energy, and even a huge price. Just like almost every woman has a piano dream in her heart, but learning the piano requires time and leisure. For middle-aged people for whom time is money and life, they often spend one minute into two minutes. There is endless overtime work outside, and there is a family that needs high-quality companionship inside. Such a time arrangement can only choose to compromise one's own dreams.

There is a mother in the community who is good at singing and dancing, and is especially good at dancing. She once had a dream about dancing. She was once a popular figure in school and work, and received blazing attention and countless awards on the stage. applause. But now, she silently returns to her family, takes care of her husband and raises her children, and talks to her about her original dream. She said that now she is busy with raising children and household chores every day, so she has no time to regain her dream.

5. It’s too shameful to talk about dreams

There are a small number of people who have never forgotten their dreams, just because they recognize the cruelty and disparity of reality and have always carefully carried their dreams in their arms. Here, I am afraid that I will "die from the light" when I see the light. Because I know that it is difficult to realize my dream, I am worried that I will not achieve it and make people laugh, and because of subjective and objective reasons, I lack the perseverance and determination to persevere. Therefore, the only option is to be "ashamed to speak out." Because we have passed the age where we can "talk arrogantly" and be young and frivolous no matter what. Instead, we have reached the age of "careful words" where almost every sentence must be filtered by the brain.

A senior I met at university has been writing non-stop for many years and has continued to contribute articles to local media. Occasionally, some of his works have been published in newspapers. I often joke with him that he wants to be a columnist? He never admitted it. It wasn't until they had a heart-to-heart talk that he said that he had always dreamed of being a freelance writer since college. However, due to the pressure of survival, he could only choose to compromise temporarily, but he never gave up his efforts. I dare not admit it easily in front of outsiders for fear of being laughed at by others.

It is true that there is never the word "easy" in the adult world. But I believe that anyone with a dream deserves to be respected, and any dream deserves to be protected and treasured, even if it is a dream that seems humble, insignificant, or even whimsical to outsiders.

Compared with "You still have to have dreams, what if they come true?", I feel that no matter whether dreams can be realized or not, at least they should not be forgotten, ignored, or even afraid of being laughed at. of.

It is precisely because we have reached crisis-ridden middle age that we need to be more brave in talking about our dreams. Because of the baptism of life and the accumulation of experience, middle-aged dreams are more grounded and closer to one's heart.

Dreams are like navigation when we are driving on the broad road of life and suddenly lose direction and panic. It can guide us to the correct destination.

Middle-aged life is as dull as water and as boring as wax. If there is no nourishment from dreams, then life will be even more miserable. If there is no poetry and longing for the distant future in life, then there will be nothing but contentment. Dreams are the poetry and distance in our lives, allowing us to always cherish beautiful expectations and keep approaching the hazy poetry of the distance.

"Those who have dreams cannot sleep, and those who have no dreams cannot wake up." But I believe that those who persist in their dreams will never be let down. People with dreams walk with wind, have light in their eyes, are full of positive energy, and live a meaningful life.

I hope that as we enter middle age, we will boldly talk about our dreams, bravely accept public supervision, and force ourselves to rise from different places and keep getting closer to our dreams.

As an advocate of talking about dreams in middle age, let me first set an example and talk about my dreams:

Wander in the free world

Write what you like Be in a good mood

Be able to rely on your interests to determine your inner aspirations

When you are happy, sing loudly as if no one else is around

When you are sad, let your tears flow freely

Thoughts on work Just do it, don’t force it if you don’t want to do it

You don’t have to look at anyone’s face to hold back your internal injuries

In the relationship, each other fulfills the paradise they want

Don’t say it easily Who is who is irreplaceable forever

For freedom, everything is unstoppable...

This is what I have been chasing: a small and unattainable dream

said To put it bluntly: We just want to be a financially independent free man of letters and live a free and happy life!

Although this dream is still far from the bottom, I always believe that the future can be expected!

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