How to write English enlightenment in jokes?

Ahem. . . I will pull out the seedlings to encourage them. . .

English: In ancient Song Dynasty, there was a farmer who planted rice, hoping for an early harvest.

He goes to the rice fields every day and finds that the rice seedlings grow slowly. His face was tired, and I thought to myself, "What can make rice seedlings grow tall and long soon? After thinking it over and over again, he came up with a "best way", that is, you can dial if you are high.

After some hard work, he contentedly carried a hoe and went home to rest. Then I went home and said to people, "I'm exhausted today. I helped the crops grow greatly!"

His son ran to the field and saw that He Miao was completely destroyed.

English: In the ancient Song Dynasty, a farmer planted rice seedlings in the hope of harvesting them early.

Every day when he goes to the rice field, he finds that the seedlings grow slowly. He was impatient and thought, "How can we make rice seedlings grow tall and fast? He thought and thought, and finally came up with a "best way", which is to set the rice seedlings a few points higher.

After some hard work, he went home to rest with a hoe. Then I went back and confessed to my family: "I'm exhausted today. I helped the crops grow a lot!" " "

His son hurried to the field and saw that all the seedlings were dead.