I am most afraid of poor prose writing.

When I graduated from college, it was the time when I lost my job.

On the morning of leaving school, I felt drunk and in a daze, and I didn't want to wake up again. Finally, like many classmates, I got on the bus to Dongguan.

At about four o'clock in the morning, we got off the bus and ate steamed dumplings and goose egg porridge on the table outside a porridge house. Then we took the bag from the car and went to the dormitory arranged by the school director, and made the bed in a daze.

At noon, a female leader called me together and took us to the company training hall that said "Dongguan Great Wall Broadband Service Co., Ltd.", and then found a short and fat leader to train us in safety technology and brag.

I worked as an intern in Dongguan Great Wall Broadband Company for half a year. For half a year, I earned a little more than 2000 a month. Every morning, my colleagues and I line up in front of the store and sing Lu Yi's Thank you. Then I put up small advertisements with my toolkit on my back, pull the network cable and help customers maintain the network. I climbed down the bamboo ladder around 9 pm and even got off work.

I clearly remember that on the first day of work, my master and I were arrested by the city management. They want to confiscate our bicycles and constantly threaten us; Trying to hit us. We quarreled with the urban management for a long time and finally eased our tone. We stuffed cigarettes into the hands of the city management, and then scraped the small advertisements off the elevator with a shovel under their supervision.

It was the first time that I was threatened by a man in uniform. My heart was pounding and my stomach hurt. I really wanted to quit, but my master finally smiled and comforted me and said "just get used to it", so I put up with it.

He is from Henan and treats people very well. He likes to smoke "Hongtashan" brand cigarettes, drink with us and eat green onion noodles with a big washbasin.

Almost every day, he and I carry ladders to the village to hang billboards and put bamboo ladders on littered network cables and wires. Then the master held the ladder at the bottom. I climbed to the top of the ladder, stood on the rickety ladder, and tied the billboard with a cable tie. The rest of the time, I will hold up a big parasol with the company name printed on it in the square, and explain the broadband internet package to those who come to consult while handing out leaflets. If someone needs to install broadband, I will carry the ladder with that person.

I often ride a bicycle between villages in the city, holding the handrail of the bicycle in one hand, walking around the street with a bamboo ladder in the other hand, or walking around with a heavy cable box in the other hand.

After more than two months, I left the village in the city to install and maintain broadband networks for customers in the community. I left because the electrician almost fell off the high ladder and was beaten by the landlord. The electrician was greedy for the money that should have been given to the landlord, and the landlord took it out on us. The landlord cuts the network cable at will, and I have to stare at customers' complaints. I often bite my flashlight and work until midnight, and I have to accept complaints and threats from Unicom and telecom employees. When I am away, my second-hand bicycle is often stolen even if it is chained, and I am poor, and my salary is just enough to live, so I can't buy bicycles often.

After moving to the community, I ran to the building to distribute leaflets every day, stuffed advertising paper at the door, and ran in while the tenant went out, leaving the door open.

More than 70 buildings, running up and down every day is really painful. On weekends, I sat at the gate handing out leaflets while waiting for customers to find me to install broadband.

I suffer from cell phone phobia. As soon as my mobile phone rings, I get flustered and feel something is wrong.

I get off work later and later. I stood alone on the roof, paying off the line outside the client's window and looking at the lights under the building. Sometimes I really want to jump off a building, but I just feel helpless.

My client has a good attitude. They often talk to me and occasionally pass me water. When I braved the heavy rain to repair them, they were embarrassed. I can only say that this is my job. Among my clients; A client who is a lawyer even handed me a business card, saying that if the company made things difficult for me, he could represent me for free. I smiled and took his business card and told him that I hoped I would never use it. Then I cried, and I don't know why.

I feel that life is getting worse and worse. I always feel that I don't have enough money to spend, I dare not buy anything, I haven't bought anything, and my salary is gone. Later, my colleague asked me to try to sell routers to customers. I thought about it. Good. So when customers need a router or need to install a computer system, I will charge them dozens of dollars to help them install the system, or say hello to the owner of a computer shop outside the community, buy their router, and then sell it to customers to make a difference.

As the days passed, when the internship ended, I didn't even have 5 thousand yuan in my hand.

After the internship, my teacher told me that if I didn't send them the photos of the labor contract, I wouldn't get the diploma. The students scolded the teacher many times in the class group, but the teacher said that some of us were talking nonsense and misleading. Let's go out. So, I returned to Dongguan with my suitcase.

Two.

I can't go anywhere. I can go anywhere. I am sitting on a train with 100 tickets. During the 13 hour journey, I really hope this train will go on and never stop. I don't want to get off the train I'm afraid I won't know where to go when I get off the train.

However, I will get off the train eventually.

After getting off the train, I bought a cheap ten-dollar umbrella like everyone else and came to a bus transfer station. I stood under the T-bus stop for a long time, looking at the traffic coming and going, and my eyes were sour. Later, I casually walked into a car and threw two coins into the till to let it go where it could go.

I saw a building that was not too high, and I got off when I felt pleasing to the eye. Then I found a room in 350 yuan for a month, and the money in my pocket was only suitable for renting such a house.

This is a room near an alley. There is no sunshine at all during the day, so clothes can only be dried in the toilet. I bought a mat and a pillow to stay, because it was still very hot, so I covered my stomach with clothes as a quilt and fell asleep soon.

When I woke up, it was midnight, my stomach was empty, my head was groggy, and my heart was tight. I quickly washed my face and gargled, vomited some vomit, and then went downstairs to Shaxian snack bar to eat a bowl of vegetarian noodles.

After coming out of the snack bar, I can't go anywhere, because it always rains and the ground is muddy, which is inconvenient and I am still alone.

I went back to my dormitory and started looking for a job on the job search website, but there was no news for several days. So, I waited for the weather to clear up and walked along the street by the 1 1 bus, hoping to find those shops that were recruiting people.

I was told that there is a large piece of land in Li Ka-shing. I think in that case, I will be active in the territory of the richest man in China. After a day's walk, really, my legs and feet are sore and my short sleeves are wet. I keep walking, but all I can see is the job of recruiting dishwashers or clothing sales, which is basically related to women.

Later, I saw the recruitment paper of graphic designer in an advertising shop and went in. The boss who received me asked me to sit in front of the computer and draw a small advertising pattern of foam signboard with CorelDRAW. I painted foolishly for half an hour, but the boss still asked me to look for him in another district three days later. He told me his new address, so I called him three days later and took a bus to the place he said. He didn't remember me and told me that he didn't need anyone anymore. I left disappointed, only feeling stupid and being teased like this.

A month later, I didn't even have 500 yuan in my pocket. Before that, I lied to my parents that I found a job and told them not to worry. A month later, I found a job, but this job was in a factory dozens of kilometers away. I didn't even get the deposit, so I left with my suitcase and cushion.

My first job was in a printing factory. All I need to do is typeset all kinds of logo patterns and make movies. I made a contract with my boss for half a year, and that's it.

They kept my salary down for a month and a half, so I had no choice but to endure it. Fortunately, accommodation, lunch and dinner are free. When I first arrived, everyone in the dormitory was very nice, a thick and heavy antique white computer. Even if my money is used to buy breakfast and water, I can only go to work hungry a few days before I get paid, and when I get off work at nine o'clock in the evening, I can't sleep because I'm hungry. I dare not control my salary to my boss and boss's wife in advance, because they don't like me, think I work very leisurely every day, and lecture me every day. I'm afraid they will know that I don't even have money to eat now, so they can bully me.

A colleague next door occasionally chats with me and invites us to have a beer when he comes. Later, he became an order taker, and we often worked in an office. Although I can't tell him anything every day, I feel very gratified that I can let him hear my boss's lecture every day. He saw that I didn't go to breakfast for many days, gave me a box of yogurt, and then lent me 100 yuan.

I cried. I didn't cry in front of him, but went to the toilet without a door and cried for a while.

After more than two months, I got my first salary, 3,800 yuan, which I clearly remember. I agreed with my boss to pay 3500, but they gave me 3800. I asked them why, but they just asked me to take it. Later, I never got a higher salary from them.

I'm afraid of going to work every day, afraid that my boss will yell at me in the back of my head. She sat behind me as if watching me. She always thought I could do nothing well, but she made everything for me, even her brother's list. Even so, it's not enough. She wants me to learn how to wash dishes and cut film. She can't watch me idle, I can only live in fear. She always tries to hit me, thinking that I can't do it well and I can't do it well. Whether it's right or wrong, blame the problem on me, and finish the list before lunch. Because the customer sent me the wrong picture, my boss told my wife's boss a lot, but I didn't thank him, because the more he explained it to me, the more my wife's boss would lecture me.

I really want to tell her that I like these patterns and paintings, but I dare not say, because she will definitely lecture me. Later, they hired another draftsman, and then she began to speak ill of me and say all kinds of things with the local draftsman. Finally, their new draftsman left after a week's work.

I thought there was someone who could understand each other, but in the end I was the only one left. From then on, I knew I wouldn't stay here for long. I asked my boss about his resignation, but they didn't agree, because the contract period didn't come, but I really had a headache. If I stay, I don't know what to do. If everything I do is wrong, what's the point of doing it?

In the evening, when I sit in the corridor to relax and complain about smoking with my colleagues, we all have plans to leave, and repeating such plans and complaints over and over again every day will never be realized.

On Sunday night, they went to find a woman by motorcycle, so I went shopping. I asked myself again and again, what happened to me? Do I live like this and muddle along like this?

I left before the Chinese New Year. With the help of a colleague, I secretly took the suitcase and left at night. I left without taking my salary for more than a month.

Three.

After returning home, I had a rest for a while, and when I was going out to work, my senior called me. She said that she sells tourism products in Inner Mongolia. If I really can't find a job, I can stay with her for a while.

I have been in contact with my senior, and she never stopped. She often sends her own photos and recent photos in QQ space. I took the train, stayed on the train for more than 40 hours, and came to Baotou City.

It was a morning, and I was shivering with cold, unable to speak clearly, and my hands were as cold as iron. Dressed in white and gray, my senior took me to a noodle restaurant to eat noodle soup. She smiled and asked me something about the train, and then went to the vegetable market with me to buy food. She and I pulled the luggage to an unguarded community and climbed to the top floor.

I entered the room. The room with two bedrooms and one living room was ordinary, nothing special.

I sat on the sofa with her and told me to settle down first, not to worry about my work, to have a rest first, and then to go to the hospital to find my colleagues. I saw the doctor doing acupuncture on my colleagues' hands, so I sat by the fire and chatted with them.

In the evening, several people in the room introduced each other. As for her, she wanted to borrow my mobile phone to read novels before going to bed, so I had to lend it to her.

In the evening, I slept in a bed with a friendly boy. The boy then asked me about my personal hobbies, and I said I liked history, so he told me "those things in the Ming Dynasty" with great interest. I also enjoyed chatting with him and fell asleep very late. The next day, they poured me hot water for washing my face, handed me a toothbrush, a cup and squeezed toothpaste. I told them not to be so polite, but they insisted on doing so.

In the morning, we went to the flower market for a while, and then went to the electronic city. I want to take a picture, so I ask my senior to give me my phone back. She hesitated and returned my mobile phone to me in the laughter of others. They looked around at BMW and Mercedes-Benz and told me that there were millions of poor people everywhere, so I giggled with them.

After several days, I asked them why they didn't go to work. They said that they were not busy at work recently, and they were more idle. After lunch, we sat on the soft mat on the ground and played poker. A fat man in casual clothes came in with a domestic tablet computer in his hand.

When they saw the man come in, they introduced me to each other and called him the leader. He gave them lectures, and I also attended lectures, asking questions about economic and national development from time to time. They talked about some economic transformation, about the cooperative economy more than ten years ago, and then used playing cards as an economic model to talk about problems, from economic problems to stocks, from stocks to banks, and then left before I turned my head, shaking hands with everyone and me before leaving.

I'm a little confused. In the evening, I talk about history with my roommate. In the morning, the seniors began to talk behind closed doors about some advanced modes that I didn't understand. It was loud, and my colleagues sitting next to me answered loudly "Yes, yes, yes" or "Yes, yes, yes" or "I believe, I believe, I believe" these explosions.

So I know that I have joined the MLM organization, and my heart is pounding, but I dare not make public. On this day, we didn't go anywhere, and we were dragged to another community by a woman to give a lecture.

This is a shabby house. Everything in the room is like rotten, indescribable, like after a fire, and like being wrapped in wet vegetation, with a strange smell. But for more than an hour, they were all excited and didn't care at all.

For several days, their leaders slept on the floor of the living room, which I didn't have before I came. So I couldn't sleep well for several nights, leaving only fear in my heart.

In the morning, I get up early, then put on my shoes and open the door for a walk. The senior in the following article stopped me, and I repeatedly asked her to let a colleague follow me downstairs. I ran for a long time, and the cold air tore in my lungs for a long time, which was painful and sour, but I still can't believe I joined the MLM organization.

Finally, my senior colleagues and I went back to the dormitory talking and laughing, ate the batter and began to listen to their lectures. In the evening, I said I wanted to buy something, but they didn't stop me this time. After I came back, my senior leader showed me some cosmetics and brochures, saying that they were for sale, and vaguely said something that made me feel ignorant, which reassured me. In this way, I know that they have found my face wrong. I think these people have been through a lot, and it is normal to know that I am suspicious.

I don't believe what they say, because those things are too fake, which means they are just like inferior toilet paper printed outside.

They no longer let me go out at will, but I threatened them with their fruit knives and they agreed. So I went out for a walk alone again, and their leader followed me on an electric car. I looked at the railway station and wanted to go, but I didn't. I bought some old readers' magazines and came back. Forcing myself to sleep at night, falling asleep again and again, waking up again and again, my heart is so tight.

Early in the morning, I climbed onto the roof to freeze my clothes and put them in the suitcase. Then I dragged my luggage and left. They looked at me and said a lot of things to keep me, but I didn't listen. Senior sister cried and followed me downstairs. She took my hand and told me to stay.

"You come with me and I'll take care of you," I shouted to her after I went downstairs, not afraid of anything. "Don't be here, let's go!"

She wouldn't listen to me, she just wanted me to stay. I have repeated these words several times. She didn't listen to me, so I left angrily.

This is a pyramid scheme I didn't expect. There is no violent pyramid scheme, only pyramid schemes tied by feelings.

I didn't leave immediately, but stayed in a hotel near the railway station for a day to calm my uneasy heart. The next day, I found a house in 700 yuan for one month, and I didn't even need a deposit.

I stayed in Baotou for more than half a month and stayed in the car, usually walking back and forth in various companies. I was cheated by a cleaning cream company to be a salesman all day, and I almost paid a deposit of 400 yuan in a daze. It's useless to talk to the company leaders who publish government magazines for a few days, and to do free copy planning for real estate for a few days, all of which are unsatisfactory.

Four.

That night, I called my parents and told them that I wanted to go home. I called my senior and told her that I was still in Baotou and asked her to go with me, but she refused.

I left. I didn't even call the police. Because there is no violent detention, the police can't arrest them at all. They can say that they are tourists, and they will still come back after the police send them away.

Finally, I bought a train ticket, a train ticket not to go home.

My next city, Hangzhou, is a starting signal from my classmates before I go home.

Where else can I go? I can only set out like a tramp, take a bus to Hangzhou, live in a rental house near the West Bus Station, and live with two college students.

They are all programmers. When I went to Dongguan for an internship, they studied programming in Wuhan Training School for half a year.

I didn't tell them my experience. I just listened to their arrangement and settled down.

I started looking for a job, and with the help of two classmates, I eliminated the deceptive training institutions. They are very experienced in this field. They told me that these institutions would waste my time making drawings. Then, regardless of whether your drawings are good or not, they think they are not good enough, but they will not kick me out immediately, but introduce me to their company's training business and let me spend money to study.

It took a long time to find a job, and then I found a company called Chemao to do second-hand car business. I was late for the interview because I was unfamiliar with the road, but I was admitted because few people really came and I really needed someone to edit the car information.

The interview was held in a shabby old building. Later, I often heard people say that these are small things. After all, Ma Yun used to come like this.

Three days later, the personnel manager asked me to report to the West Railway Station Pioneer Park, and I realized that the company had moved to a beautiful place.

This is the first time in my life that I feel relaxed. In the huge office area, everything is clean, all computers are brand-new, the company's LOGO is neatly hung on the fire hose overhead, and there is even a billiard table inside.

In the evening, we stood at the gate of the company and introduced ourselves. We issued a work card, 022, and this is my work number. In the evening, the chairman invited us to the hotel for dinner. I was drunk and walked to the dormitory, very happy.

Five days later, I was called to the office by someone from the finance department. They gave me 700 yuan to sign. I'm a little disappointed. I thought they would kick me out. Later, they laughed at me and said they just paid me. I have only been here for five days, and they gave me money. Later, I learned that the company pays wages on the first day of each month and does not accept employees' wages.

It's really hard for me to describe the mood at that time. I almost jumped out of the finance department. Soon, a month later, I signed the company's work contract and handed in the bank card number.

I have to review the information of hundreds of cars every day. It was hard at first. After all, I don't even know what manual gear means. Later, the manager asked me to look at the car website more. I have been asking my colleagues for advice, taking time off to look at the car website, mastering the basic knowledge, buying books on car problems according to the manager's requirements, and taking the books every morning to accept the manager's "exam" like other colleagues.

Half a month later, I got a qualified result in the PPT exam about the car model sent by the manager, so I began to learn how to check the specific configuration and model of the car again.

In this way, after I stayed in the company for nearly half a year, the automobile inspection department that cooperated with the sales department was born.

BD, I still don't understand the meaning of these two English letters together, but my manager still asked me to transfer to this department to report. My dormitory is far from Motown, and I'm not good at dealing with people, but my manager told me that people sometimes have to push themselves. I can't do these mechanical jobs all my life. If I want to do something, whatever the reason, it is an excuse and an opportunity to exercise.

What else is there to say? Of course I listened to him, and I quickly reported it to the BD department.

In the new department, I teamed up with a "manager" in the northeast. I usually call him Brother Qiang. I bought a bicycle and rode it from West Bus Station to East Bus Station every day. After the meeting at around 9 o'clock every day, I go to the automobile city to contact car dealers of all sizes, hoping that they can drive their cars to the testing hall for testing, and then stick a certificate with the company logo on the windshield of the car.

In the morning, take a notebook to record the cars that the car dealer didn't enter on the company website, take photos with your mobile phone, update the garage information when you have time, and cooperate with the sales department to sell cars. More often, I need to cooperate with those engaged in finance to help car dealers brush the POS machines we provide.

I experienced the first second-hand auto show in Hangzhou at that time. During the national day, I distributed leaflets, wandered back and forth in countless cars, and occasionally introduced vehicle information to people who came to consult.

My colleagues and I put the plastic boxes filled with water neatly on the side of the road in the morning, planted colorful flags with the company LOGO printed on them, and collected them one by one at night, then took my colleagues' car back to the city and rode back to the dormitory. During that time, although I worked late, I was still very happy.

A year later, my contract expired, and I was wondering what I should do and whether I should stay. I like this company. Really. Watching my colleagues being sent to other cities to expand projects one by one, I still stayed in Checheng to maintain the relationship between car dealers. I stayed not long after the resources of Checheng were saturated. Then I chose not to renew my work contract.

My local colleague who resigned on the same day drove me to many places. He drove me to see the two houses allocated to him by the developer after the demolition, showed me the tides of Qiantang River and took me to climb mountains and swim the lake. I am grateful to him and still have contact with him.

Everything was as I expected, and before long, the company began to lay off employees. Sales and BD employees in various cities have left their jobs one after another, and a few people who have stayed have started financial business and found partners.

Before leaving Hangzhou, I said goodbye to my junior college classmates who helped me, and then returned to Wuhan with my luggage. I didn't go home, but moved to a friend's dormitory.

Wuhan is not suitable for work, the rent is more expensive than Hangzhou, and there is no cheap village for migrant workers to live in.

It took me a long time to find a company called 273 used car with the help of my friends. At that time, there was only one company related to used cars in Wuhan. In desperation, I accepted a job with a basic salary of two months 1000 yuan. Two months later, the basic salary was gone, and I lived entirely on the commission from selling cars.

This is a joke. I only sold two cars in a few months, and other colleagues are similar to me. No one listens to me when I tell the truth, and I don't want to deceive others when I tell lies. It took me nearly a month to understand the operation of the company. I hand out leaflets every day, and then search for information about selling cars online, find buyers, show cars to customers, and contact people who lend money. ...

I have never felt that doing one thing would be so tiring. I need to get in touch with everyone involved in used cars. I have to run around the car every day, and I have to go to a remote place ten kilometers away with my colleagues to distribute leaflets, but all I find are Santana or Elysee with a history of more than ten years, or accident cars and soaking cars.

I deal with car dealers scattered in every corner of Wuhan, around the three towns. I spent most of my time on the bus, but I was very busy, and there was no improvement, and I didn't have much money in my pocket.

I resigned because I couldn't make ends meet, and then I took a driver's license. I got my driver's license successfully, and was finally introduced by my friend's sister to work in the general motors supply factory.

When I was working in Wuhan, I needed to pay back the money my friend lent me, so I promised her.

In this way, I will stand by the machine every day and work 13 hours every day, whether it is day shift or night shift, until the end of the year.

My parents always ask me why I can't get a penny back from home after doing things for so long. I often have nothing to say, sometimes I ask myself what's wrong, is it because I didn't work hard enough or other reasons!

I also hope to find a job safely, even if it doesn't suit me.

Now, I'm leaving again.

I don't want to complain, just encourage myself to be brave and not to recall the past. After all, people's eyes can only look forward.

-Finally, I hope those post-90s who work like me will bravely travel outside!