Who can tell a few funny and hilarious jokes (don't laugh at jokes, I hate them)? Don't be too funny!

1. Suddenly found that "1 3 1 4" is the opposite.

2. Suddenly found: scissors, stone and cloth-originally 5.2.0.

Honey, you are so humorous. Hold someone and say you love me.

4. Look at other people's signatures and look for the same feelings as yourself.

When breaking up, don't say "inappropriate" to me, I'm a Martian! People who are not suitable for bowling?

6. Many people come into your life just to teach you a lesson and then turn around and leave.

7. When I was a child. Cry, cry, laugh, grow up, laugh, laugh, cry.

8. I finally know why I want to lick Oreos, because then no one dares to rob them. . ;

9 ._ Distance does not produce beauty, but an interpretation of fragile love. \\

10.◎◆ Reality tells us. What happened? Don't worry. It's nothing. Don't go bankrupt. What are you moving? Don't get emotional. .

1 1. Question: Why do they always play fragments of their manuscripts after the news? Answer: I tell you, we brag in the draft! -

12. I have lived until now, only chopsticks can be put down!

13. Love is like an hourglass. Heart full, brain empty!

14. Life troubles 12 words: I can't let go, I can't get over it, I can't see through it, I can't forget it.

15. "May Day is really happy", the first six words are the most touching now, and the last one is long gone.

16. Journey to the West told us that all the fairies with backstage were taken away, and those without backstage were killed by a stick.

17. China's son preference problem, which could not be solved for thousands of years, was actually solved by real estate!

18. Women think that men are playboy without charm, and men think that women are reality without strength.

The second episode:

1 I hope I love you one day, and I can write backwards. ..

You're not an environmental protection bag. Don't always pretend, pretend, pretend.

Slowly, when I grow up, I feel that I am silent and know more, but I am not happy. Is everyone like this?

Four hours later. Cry, cry, laugh, grow up, laugh, laugh, cry.

When you are not a stranger, you pretend to be stranger than a stranger.

Don't always think that your parents are dirty and have no face. Our parents' kindness can never be repaid.

7- Don't judge others easily, because you haven't experienced his life.

8- Every time I finish the exam, I comfort myself,' It doesn't matter, everyone is participating.

I believe in you and myself.

10- I feel sorry for every unhappy child who is still smiling.

1 1 Don't wear off your present self with past memories.

12 the old teacher said: the senior high school entrance examination is coming, so don't fall in love and quarrel early, so as not to affect your mood; Don't confess without puppy love, lest you be rejected and affect your mood.

13- I really want to point to my heart and tell you proudly that there is a substitution here.

14-The result that cannot be subverted is the initial foreshadowing.

15 The funniest thing is that invisibility is visible to it, but you turn a blind eye to it.

16 The person who tripped me, I made him never get up, and the person who helped me, I made him never fall.

We should respect those above others and ourselves below others. Brother who sent this letter, I am very grateful to you. This is what people should understand.

18 in fact, I know everything, sometimes I just can't get through the hurdle in my heart-

19 I don't want wealth and splendor in my life, but I want my family to be healthy.

20 is about to graduate, and the principal said that each of us should choose something as a souvenir. All the students in the whole grade said in unison: principal, give us back the tuition!

2 1 God created fingerprints because he wanted people to know that everyone has scars.

Say sorry to myself, I haven't learned to love myself all these years,

The exam is a cloud, and it becomes a dark cloud after the exam.

I really want to tell you that I miss you so much, but what I am afraid of is just a simple "Oh".

A woman doesn't need to fall in love with her country, she just needs a man to devote his life to her.

You are like a hedgehog. When I held you and blood dripped on you, you said I hurt you, but you didn't know the blood was mine.

If you care, you will think. If you don't care, you won't even think about it.

On the surface, it's heart-to-heart, but behind it, it's brain-playing.

Don't think your parents are dirty, because they are the least dirty people in the world.

Looking for the true meaning of love in the mottled traces, I found myself singing a monologue on the big stage.

1. Sometimes I don't understand, I just don't want to understand; Sometimes I don't know, but I just don't want to say it; Sometimes I don't understand, but I don't know what to do when I understand, so I keep silent.

Forever is too far, we can't afford it. Times have changed, and after a few years, I'm afraid it's not just the appearance that has changed.

3. I choose to give up because I clearly understand that I can't get what I want; I don't know whether this is right or wrong, so let time decide.

4. "Even if you travel through the Millennium, you can't erase the time difference." Because no two people in the world can stand on the same point on the earth, there will always be an insurmountable distance between us.

5. "There is no hurdle" What we lack is courage.

6. "The weak who are not understood must always be strong." Sometimes being strong is also a kind of helplessness.

7. "Fortunately, I lost my life." Never ask too much of others, because no one has an obligation to help you.

8. Thank those who hurt you, because they taught you to grow up.

9. Remember to cherish when you can hold hands, and don't hesitate when you need to break up. It is necessary to "take it up and put it down."

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1 1. I crossed the long river of memory, but my body dried up; I told other people's stories, but my eyes were full of tears.

12. If a friend can still hurt you, you still care about her friendship. If the enemy can still hurt you, it means that you are not sure to defeat him.

13. If you don't even have the minimum trust, you can't talk about "bosom friends" and "friends".

14. For "friends", what I want is simple, as long as I am honest and sincere.

15. You don't know, in fact, all I want is good friends.

16. When you can't catch something, learn to give up and know how to choose.

17. When a place has nothing to miss, you have to leave.

18. I saw the shadow of childhood in you, but we all became young people.

19. Life is full of regrets, and what we can do is to minimize them.

20. There is so much helplessness in life that sometimes we have to force ourselves to do things we don't like to do in order to get what we want.

2 1. Although time has changed the face, it cannot erase the hidden memory. When we were in our twenties, we sat together and talked about the past when we were teenagers. It feels as if everything has gone back to the past, as if the separated blank memory never existed.

22. "Since we can't help each other, it's better to forget each other in the rivers and lakes." "The rivers and lakes forget each other" is a state, so it is a kind of helplessness.

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23. I can't learn insincerity.

Why can't I get used to going to bed early and getting up early?

25. I don't know whether I am in love with your gentleness or your cleverness or your hypocrisy.

26. Your warmth fascinates me and makes me think it is love.

I would rather have your cruel indifference than that false promise.

28. If the reunion is for another forgetfulness, I would rather never get together with you.

29. Some distances are thought to be crossed, but they are not; Some things can only be gorgeous in memory, but they will break when touched in reality.

30. Some people say that "refusing others to approach is just for fear that others will see their failure", which is another kind of inferiority complex.

3 1. Sometimes liking is a habit; Sometimes liking is a kind of sustenance.

32. I thought that as long as you work hard, time and space are not distances. Now I understand that all this is just a puppet show that I tried to perform alone.

I'm waiting for someone to fulfill my promise, but I just watch the date come day by day, and that person hasn't come yet. I'm afraid he will forget, and I'm afraid he's too busy to cash it, so I have to face it bravely alone.

34. "The stage is as big as the heart." If you dare not dream, how can you hope to succeed?

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35. Who can be kind to whom all his life? There was never an immortal oath.

Since we can't change it, we have to leave.

37. The feeling of lovelorn is like a big hole in your heart, which you can't fill.

38. We are familiar strangers, seemingly familiar but unfamiliar; Feel familiar but unfamiliar.

Thank you for your indifference, which showed me a lot.

40. Loneliness is an unavoidable emotion. It feels like: even if there are many people clamoring around you, if no one touches your soul, you will still feel lonely.

4 1. True loneliness is not a person's loneliness, but the loneliness in the depths of the soul.

42. When you are lonely, don't find someone to accompany you, because if he can't touch your heart, you will still feel lonely.

He kept saying to her, "You must be happy!" I was repeating this sentence when I left, but he didn't know that she needed him to make her happy, and only he could. He gave her away to someone else. How can she be happy?

5 1. A story written on paper always has an ending, while a story written in the heart has an unknown ending.

1. Friends are like RMB, which is true and false.

2. Eat a candy when you are sad and tell yourself that life is sweet!

Life is like riding a bike. If you want to keep your balance, you must move forward.

4. When you were born, you were crying and people around you were laughing; At the end of your life, you are smiling and everyone around you is crying. The so-called life, but that's all, why not have a happy time. Face it with a smile and experience it bravely.

Life is like an angry bird. There are always a few pigs laughing when they fail.

6. Don't be sad when friends ignore you. Everyone has his own life, and no one can always accompany you.

7. liking someone is a feeling, but not liking someone is a fact. The facts are easy to explain, but the feeling is unspeakable. The difference between "love" and "like" is simple. If you love a flower, water it. If you like it, pick it!

Being single means that you are strong enough and patient enough to wait for the person who is worth you.

9. There are three kinds of friends in life: a lifetime, a cup and a quilt. When you are proud, your friends know you; When you are in trouble, you make new friends.

10. When you are upset, remember three sentences: 1, forget it. 2. it doesn't matter. 3. It will pass.

1 1. One word "oh" broke all the topics I wanted to say.

12. How much truth does a simple "hehe" cover?

13. How many people post QQ signatures or QQ chats just to show people?

14. When I am more and more polite to you, we may become more and more strangers. ...

15. As long as people are separated, people who are familiar with each other will gradually alienate.

16. Don't expose the wound to others easily, because others are busy, but they are hurting themselves.

17. If you haven't experienced what others have experienced, don't judge a person's past!

18. No matter how vigorous a couple is, they can't compare with their parents.

19. Can we not have limited communication with our parents in their limited time?

20. Who still remembers the advertisement: A little boy came into the room trembling with a basin of water: "Mom, wash your feet!