Joke Daquan makes girlfriend happy Introduction Joke Daquan makes girlfriend happy.

1, the husband took an orchid bowl and said solemnly to his wife, "You can't break the bowl again. This bowl was left by your mother. There are only two left at the moment, and you have to break the others. " The wife gave her husband a white look and said, "Then don't be angry with me in the future. I was dumped by my mother, too.

2. Sleeping in class: Students sleep in class and are found by teachers. Teacher: "Why do you sleep in class?" Student: "I didn't sleep!" " "Teacher:" Then why do you close your eyes? Student: "I am meditating! ""Teacher: "Then why do you nod?" Student: "What you just said is very reasonable!" " "Teacher:" Then why are you drooling? Student: "Teacher, you speak with relish! "

A beautiful woman in the community opened an animal clinic. A buddy and I couldn't help chatting up: Hello, is this for animals? She smiled and replied: Yes! The elder brothers lie in the hospital bed first: Please help me check, I am Cheng! Not to be outdone, I immediately lay down next to him: Please check me, too. I'm single dog!

After a heavy rain, I went home by taxi. I didn't take two steps to get off the bus and found that my mobile phone was missing. I wondered if I left it on the bus. I hurried back and found that the car was leaving, so I shouted a few words, "Master, stop!" " "Suddenly found the phone in my hand. When I looked up, I saw the car had stopped. The master poked his head out and asked me what it was. I used my quick wits and shouted, "It's raining hard. Drive slowly!"! "Say that finish, I turned away. I still can't imagine his expression at that time.

I went out to eat a McDonald's yesterday. They all arrived at the door of the store and were told that they could only place orders with the US delegation. Then I stood at the door and placed an order. I also gave a delivery fee of 9 yuan and assigned a takeaway brother. I stood at the door side by side with the takeaway brother, waiting. The clerk took it out and handed it to him. He handed it to me. This action cost me 9 yuan.

The doctor asked the patient how he broke his bone. The patient said, I felt sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes with a telephone pole. One of them passed by and thought I was electrocuted, so he picked up a stick and gave me two!

7. Someone keeps a pig and hates it, but it's useless for the pig to know the way home. One day, he drove a lot of cars and abandoned the pig. He called home late at night and asked, "Is the pig coming back?" Answer: "I have come back!" " It growled, "put it on the phone, I'm lost!"

8. The elephant accidentally stepped on the ant's nest, and the ant crawled on the elephant. The elephant shook its body and the ants fell down. At this time, there was another elephant around its neck, and the fallen ant shouted "strangle it".

9. One morning in computer class, a row of classmates' computers crashed. So a classmate stood up and said, "Teacher, the computer crashed, and our platoon was all dead." At this time, many students said, "We are dead, too." Then the teacher asked, "Who else is not dead?" Only one classmate stood up and said, "I'm not dead yet!" " "The teacher said strangely," the whole class is dead. Why don't you die? "

10. Before eating peanuts, monkeys should put peanuts in their buttocks before taking them out. The administrator explained: Someone once fed it peaches, but the peach core could not be pulled out. The monkey is afraid. You must measure it before eating now.