Ask for funny jokes (the more characters in it, the better, and everyone's words and words are as concise as possible)

1. Chief: Hello, comrades! Soldier: Hello, Chief! The chief patted a soldier on the chest and said, how well this muscle is trained! Soldier: report to the chief, I am a female soldier! 2. A farmer asked a veterinarian to breed pigs, and the veterinarian said: It seems that artificial breeding is needed. The farmer hesitated for a long time, summoned up his courage and said, Yes, I'm afraid it will bite me. 3. One day, and 8 met in the street. took a disdainful look at 8 and said: If you are fat, you will be fat. What belts are you wearing? 4. A sister-in-law saw a man who was about to get off the bus drop a pack of cigarettes on the pedal, so she quickly said to the man, Comrade, you dropped your cigarettes! The man is furious: you just castrated! 5. A village woman wants to go to the toilet for the first time in the city, but she hasn't met for a long time, so she has no choice but to ask the police: Comrade, there is a public toilet in front, where is the mother toilet? 6. M: What would you do if I hugged you? Woman: resist! Man: What would you do if I kissed you? Woman: Resist. Man: If I ... Woman: It's over! Women's strength is limited after all! 7. A man was constipated when he went to the toilet, and suddenly he saw a man rushing in, and it was stormy in an instant. "Dude, I really envy you, so fast." "I envy you, I didn't take off my pants!" 8. A foreign youth in China can't understand the difference between "iron" and "steel". One night he came home late, and the door couldn't be opened, so he had to shout, landlady, will you open your steel door? I can't get in! 9. When the nurse saw the patient drinking in the ward, she went over and whispered, "Sweetheart!" The patient smiled and said, "Little baby." 1. On the bus, the pregnant woman standing said to the strange man sitting next to her: Don't you know I'm pregnant? I saw the man very nervous and said, but the child is not mine! 11. The old man confessed to his wife before he died: I once had an extramarital affair, please forgive me! Wife: What a big deal! You can sleep! Which of our children looks like you? 12. A white couple got married for many years and finally had a child, but it turned out to be dark. The husband blamed his wife and said, It's all your fault! Every time you go to bed, you must turn off the light. 13. A swimming coach is straightforward and loud. One day, he met a female student in the shopping mall and greeted him. He said loudly: You really didn't recognize you when you put on your clothes. 14. When a hungry wolf was looking for food, he heard a woman training the child: If you cry again, I'll throw you out to feed the wolf! The child cried all night, and the wolf waited outside until dawn, sighing: liar, women are liars! 15. A prisoner was executed by shooting. Because the bullet was inferior, the first shot was not fired, and then the second shot was fired ... the third shot ... At this time, the prisoner cried: Brother, strangle me, it's so fucking scary! 16. After watching the black 1-meter race, an old lady wiped her tears and said, Scared to death! Several coal diggers knelt in a row and were shot dead, but they fired without aiming. The kids were so scared that they ran away that the rope couldn't stop them! 17. Mr. Huang loves the revolution. To commemorate the Red Army, he named his son' Jun'. One day, he sent his son to class and saw the No.8 bus stop, so he shouted at his son: Huang Jun, the No.8 bus is coming! 18. A bear went to the mountains to start a business. The farmer gave him a sickle, and the carpenter gave him a hammer. When the bear came to the mountains, he met a tiger. He was so scared that he held the sickle and hammer on his head. The tiger said, I didn't see it. You are still a party member! 19. The farmer carried the excrement. When the foreigner saw it, he asked: Grandpa, how much is this sauce? The farmer said nothing, and the foreigner put it in his mouth with his hand, thinking, I won't tell you how much it costs a catty, and your sauce stinks.