Laugh till you get cramped for three minutes.

Although I don't have the money for the Spring Festival, I have a lovely heart.

2. What should I do if I feel that the target message is not slow? I'll be back soon.

3. Rich people say that they are busy and tired and would rather earn less money. I mean, is there anything more tiring than taking a million buses?

If life deceives you, don't worry, take out your beauty camera and cheat life.

5. The judge asked: Why do you print counterfeit money? The criminal said, because I can't print real money.

6. Why can't 520 be divided by 3? Because love can't hold a mistress! Wrong. Because mistress cannot be eliminated!

Don't treat love as a game, or I will abuse you to death.

8. Long-distance love, the person who often goes to the other city may not love it more, or it may be that there are many delicious things in the city.

Everything in the world can be answered with "none of your business" and "none of my business", and no one has cracked it. Until one day, God replied: I fell in love with your daughter-in-law.

10. I really hope that when I receive a red envelope in the New Year. It says "one more pack"

1 1. The class teacher said, "If you want to learn a course well, you must stick to it like chasing someone!" I interrupted him and said, "Then try chasing eight at the same time."

12. Even if a beautiful person makes a mistake, others can easily forgive him. Ugly people can't be forgiven by others because of their looks, let alone make mistakes.

Thirteen. "Maturity means that I will try to accept what I couldn't accept before." "You can try eating shit."

Fourteen. I passed the exam again and again, but I failed today. The coach finally shouted at me impatiently, "Are you afraid that you can't afford a car after the exam?" I have nothing to say.

As an experienced person, my advice to young people is: don't come here.

Sixteen years old. Three magic weapons to establish friendship between women: 1. Praise each other's clothes;

2. Share popular gossip;

3. Agree that a man is a special scum.

17. No matter how beautiful your face is, it will grow old one day. I don't think I can afford this loss, so I have never looked good.

Do you know why the jade bracelet only wears one hand? My friend told me the truth, and I applauded.

19. Someone asked: How big is your school? I replied: The aunt who sells mala Tang in the west gate of our school refused the pursuit of the uncle who sells rice noodles in the east gate because she didn't like long-distance relationships.

20. The hurdle of life is the valley of bad luck; It's over, and there are new hurdles waiting for you.

2 1. Contemporary people are short of language, and they can't chat without expression. The whole society, from primary school students to middle-aged and elderly people, is saving expression packs and gradually forming a contempt chain.

Twenty-two I used to be busy pretending to be cute and growing up. When I grow up, I am busy dating and taking care of my hair.

Twenty-three My father taught me to say, "Look at you, you are either playing with your mobile phone or playing with your computer all day." I said, "I play with my mobile phone to rest my computer, and I play with my computer to rest my mobile phone."

24. Times are changing. Dreams always change with them. I just wanted to get rich before, but now I just want to get rid of poverty!

Twenty-five I was stopped by some gangsters on my way out of middle school. I used my quick wits and shouted to a strange uncle passing by: "Uncle, someone bullied me!" " "I didn't know the gangster was so arrogant that he was not afraid of adults and beat my uncle and me. After the gangster left, my uncle beat me again to vent his anger.

26. When I was a child, I felt that I was a person who did great things. Later, I always heard people say that big things were not good, so I gave up.