A joke involving relatives and seniors.

I know many people will miss you, so I'm sorry for your trouble here. I am 24 years old. I have lived in Shanghai for five years. Went to college and walked to graduate school. I am a sophomore this year. To outsiders, my parents have a smart and sensible child, and my conditions are not bad. I should find a satisfied person. But it backfired. I have a boyfriend, but this boyfriend is 14 years older than me. It is for this reason that I have to hide my relationship with him. I have a good relationship with my current boyfriend. Although I can't live a rich life, I am still very satisfied. We have been together for eight months. I am a outspoken person, but I can't tell my family about my boyfriend, which makes it really difficult for me to hide. Gradually, I found that I shouldn't hide it like this, but my parents would definitely disagree when I said it. I also asked my boyfriend's opinion. He understands my parents very well and thinks that the biggest obstacle between us is age. He also said that if my family disagreed, he would respect my decision. In fact, I really want him to work hard on our relationship, and it is certain that his parents disagree. If he doesn't support me then, I really think all my efforts will be in vain. There is another man wandering in my life. He is my ex-boyfriend. My ex-boyfriend was my college classmate, and we broke up for personality reasons. He was very reluctant, because his breakup was a big problem, and I had to do it. Now his shortcomings have changed a lot and he is particularly concerned about me. But I can only thank him. I regard him as my family now. I am grateful, because he really cares about me wholeheartedly. Sometimes I even feel guilty for him. I dare not tell him that I have a boyfriend, for fear that he will reveal the news to his family and that he will be hit. Speaking of not feeling in love, I found that my ex-boyfriend's personality is really not what I like. I have a strong personality and do everything by myself. But after finding my husband, I don't want to do anything by myself. I also want to find someone who is stronger than me and I can rely on. But ex-boyfriends are not like this. He is simple and simple. Maybe this is why girls mature earlier than boys. I must teach him everything. So I don't feel dependent. Ex-boyfriend is optimistic at home. After all, we fall in love in order to get married and have a family, and we also have certain considerations in material conditions. The ex-boyfriend has a good family condition and is single-minded to me. My family thinks it's good to find something like this, and I'm getting older and I don't want to be picky anymore. Besides, I am in Shanghai and have a good relationship with my current boyfriend. Boyfriends nowadays don't earn much. Prices in Shanghai are relatively expensive. If I have a job in the future, we will both be a little short of money. I've thought about that, too. After all, married life needs all kinds of conditions. I know it's a waste of time if I can't marry my current boyfriend. But it's really embarrassing for me to break up with my current boyfriend. I love my current boyfriend in my heart, but I can't say it. This tangled mood has always made me inexplicably agitated. I will graduate in two years. Actually, when it comes to work, I should think about it after a year. My home is in the north, and my family doesn't want me to go to the south to develop, saying it will be very hard. I also understand the feelings of my family. I am the only girl in my family, and I will take care of my parents in the future. So I'm worried about where I belong. Now my boyfriend's love, ex-boyfriend's love and family's affection all make me really upset. Sometimes I really don't know what to choose. I don't know what choice you should make. Now, in your opinion, there are only two choices in the world, either one or the other. If we have only two choices in life, and both choices are 50% to 50%, then my suggestion is not to choose. This is nonsense, because you are making a choice at present, which is like telling a constipated person that your best choice is not to go to the toilet. What this nonsense is not so useless is that you don't accept that there is a painful process from constipation to happy excretion. I have a friend who has a child who is often constipated, so this mother often gives enema to her child. Later, if the child doesn't have an enema, he can't defecate-the sphincter loses its function. In fact, constipation in children is a very common phenomenon, including stomach pain and leg pain in children aged three or four for no reason. In medicine, this inexplicable pain is called "growth pain". I like this concept. Pursuing the love you want, should you betray the original love? Will getting the happiness you want destroy your parents' happiness? Exploring the outside world, will you find that the door of home has been closed to us forever? To some extent, when we grow to a certain stage, we will all face the dangers and temptations you encounter. The outside world is wonderful and dangerous, while the home world is depressing and safe. So how much we need our parents' permission to grow up. Without their blessing, it seems difficult for us to complete this painful transformation. You have crossed the door of love. The logic of this world is different from the world you once lived in. No one taught you how to do it, no operating instructions, and no airbags. No one can guarantee that you will never get hurt, or in other words, maybe all your wisdom and experience come from your wounds. You will walk alone in the jungle, learn to find a lover, and then build your own nest. What kind of world is that? Please look at the description of African grasslands in the animal world or National Geographic. The measure of whether a person has grown up is whether you can betray your parents. In China, when a person wants to grow up, he often fights with his parents, just like a chicken. If he wants to come to the new world, he must peck through the eggshell. How painful would it be if eggshells were blessed? But if you don't peck, how much pain might this chick have? Of course it's not as simple as fighting. After the quarrel, you need to make up with your parents again. At this time, your parents have to accept you as if you have grown up, and when you grow up, you will find that you can be compared with your parents because of your strength. A child who hides in an eggshell forever can't really take care of his parents. A person who is not strong enough to leave his parents will become the object of their parents' lifelong care, and their parents will grow old because of taking care of an oversized baby. It's true. Sometimes, we turn our fear of the world into our fear of our parents. We are not afraid of the outside world, but worried that my parents will be sad because of my choice, so we can be babies with peace of mind and let our parents continue to take care of us. Nowadays, it is more and more difficult to exist a gratifying and forever safe greenhouse. What we can do is either shrink our bones and stuff ourselves back into the eggshell, or try to explore the world where dangers and opportunities coexist outside and learn to grow up without parents' blessing. Or hovering in between.