The hottest classic humorous joke

1. I don't want to wait for anyone. Wait for the red light, the express delivery, and the take-away.

2. Be sure to use the right ear when listening to the results, because the left ear is close to the heart and may die suddenly.

Do you know how the pig died? I don't know. No, neither do pigs.

If what you give me is the same as what you give to others, I'd rather not. Aunt in the canteen: Get out if you don't eat!

Not wanting to fall in love is a good excuse, as if you can really be seen when you want to fall in love.

6. Other people's friends encourage each other to work together. My friends and I both want to work hard to get rich and wait for nothing to eat and drink.

7. Sometimes if you don't have a serious relationship, you have no idea how cool a person is.

8. Every piece of fat on your body is eaten by yourself. Come on, what do you have to complain about?

9. I finally know why I should lick Oreo first, because then no one will rob me.

10. Now kneeling keyboard is weak. My wife told me to kneel on ants. Don't run away on your knees.

1 1. My advantages are: I can correct my mistakes; My shortcoming is that I never feel wrong.

12. It was good in ancient times. If you bear too much pressure, you will become a demon, a god and a demon, while in modern times, if you bear too much pressure, you will become a psychopath.

13. After years of continuous efforts, I finally changed from an ignorant teenager to an ignorant youth.

14. Some people are good at geography, physics, history, mathematics, Chinese, English and chemistry. And I have a good attitude.

15. Do men pay more attention to women's looks or thoughts? A: Appearance determines whether I want to know her thoughts, and thoughts determine whether I will veto her appearance by one vote.

16. Love in junior high school died of changing seats, high school died of placement, and college died of graduation, but I am not. I was ashamed to fall in love and died of looks.

17. Seeing a beggar in the street, I asked him, "You have hands and feet, why are you begging?" "Although I have hands and feet, I have no money."

18. I called the mobile customer service today. The customer service answered the phone and said, "Hello, I'm glad to serve you." I said, "You are happy too early." Then I hung up.

19. I wanted to take this final exam to turn over, but I didn't expect it to stick to the pot.

20. "Why is there lightning first, then thunder?" "Because you can see where you are in a flash of light and then hit you accurately."

2 1. Confess. Don't be afraid to refuse. If one person refuses, he will confess to ten people. If ten people don't accept it, he will confess to a hundred people. If you persist for a long time, someone will be blind.

22. I think I have lost my memory. The specific performance is that once you start shopping, you forget the fact that you have no money.

23. Judging whether a straight man is reliable depends on whether he can withstand the temptation of beautiful women. If he sits still, it means he is bent.

24. Don't complain that you live too tired and hard. Like me, I used to be nothing, but now I'm different. Even the boss with a million dollars took the initiative to say hello when he saw me: "Hey, waiter, come here!" " "