A complete collection of classical jokes. com

1. In ancient times, a monk was seriously ill, was rescued and put on a young lady's bed. The master invited a doctor to see the monk. Because the monk can't see the wind, the doctor should give a thick pulse through the quilt. The doctor touched the monk's tender hand and thought it was the daughter-in-law of the host family. Said: "It's irregular menstruation, probably pregnant."

A rich man said to his servant, "When you go out with me, you should boast about my family and perform for me." The servant nodded his head. On this day, the servant went out with the rich man. Someone on the road said, "The biggest house is Sanqing Hall." The servant quickly said to others, "My master's house is as big as Sanqing Hall." After a while, someone said, "The biggest boat is the dragon boat." The servant quickly said, "My master's collection boat is as big as a dragon boat." On the way home, I heard someone say, "The biggest belly is the belly of a cow." The servant quickly said to others, "My master's belly is as big as an ox." Hearing this, the rich man's beard bristled with anger.

3. Once upon a time, there was a master Jinshi who was overbearing and arrogant. One spring festival, in order to show off, he posted such a couplet on the door: father Jinshi, son Jinshi, father and son Jinshi; Mother-in-law, daughter-in-law, mother-in-law It happened that a poor scholar in the town passed by the door of Jinshi's house and saw this couplet. First he showed contempt, and then he gave me a smug smile. In the evening, when he saw no one around, he quietly added a few strokes to the couplet. Early the next morning, there were a lot of spectators in front of Jinshi's door. They talked and laughed, and everyone praised them: "What a change! Well changed! " The noise outside the door alarmed the master Jinshi, who quickly opened the door and immediately fainted on the steps in front of the door. The couplet in front of the original Jinshi has been changed by the scholar to this:

Father in the grave, son in the grave, father and son in the grave;

Mother-in-law loses her husband, daughter-in-law loses her husband, and both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law lose their husbands.