Humorous jokes (humorous jokes)

1, an idiot stepped on a nail, went to the hospital for tetanus vaccine, and stepped on another nail the next day. He asked the doctor if he still needed vaccination. The doctor looked back and said, no, I have spare money to look at his eyes!

2. After Wang Feng and Zhang Ziyi got together, in order to convince Ziyi that he would never betray, they went to the tattoo parlor and got a "stamp" on their back. But the tattoo artist sneered: "Don't you cheat the coat of arms ..."

3. A couple loves durian very much, but they are afraid to smoke durian to their five-year-old son, so they hide in the kitchen to eat it. At this moment, the five-year-old son pushed open the door and shouted, "Well, you ate shit behind my back. ?

My best friend is pregnant for seven months. I don't know why she can't eat meat Even fried eggs make her feel fishy. After hearing this, the doctor paused and said, "You are not pregnant with a monk, are you? ! "Best friend. . .

A girl of seven or eight years old asked me what time it was on the elevator last night! I said in a weak voice, can you see me? The girl said with a lovely face, Uncle, you are so fat that no one can see you! Me: ...

Recently, the price of pork has gone up. I have a friend who is engaged in pig farms, so I went to congratulate him: "Congratulations, the price of pork has gone up, and your value has gone up again!" " As a result, he broke up with me Did I say something wrong?

7. My mother and I are lying on the sofa eating snacks. Dad came and taught me a lesson. I said weakly, "Mom is eating, too. Why didn't you tell her? " Dad: "I want your mother to be fat again." What about you? "

8. Policeman: "Say, what's your name?" Prisoner: "My name is Jackie Chan." Policeman: "Why don't you call Zhen Chen? Correct your attitude ~ tell me your name ~? " Prisoner: "My name is Zhen Chen.

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At the happy moment, two girls in the office quarreled. The manager couldn't bear it: "What a shame! What is this? You make it clear to me! " Hearing this, the two beautiful women fought over each other. "That's enough!" The manager shouted, "Fat first". Suddenly, the world was quiet. ...