Help me check the lines of the soldier's sketch "Who makes you excellent"

qi: hello, everyone. Ladies and gentlemen in front of the TV.

soldier: crosstalk performer soldier. Zhao Weiguo: Zhao Weiguo. Qi: Happy New Year to you.

soldier: aye, thank you for your encouragement. Without your encouragement, there would be no soldier today. Every friend in front of the TV is the second-born father

mother of the soldier.

Zhao Weiguo: Wow, that's a good point. Do you know why soldiers are so polite today? Because our Cultural Bureau only selected an excellent actor this year,

the soldier won the first place in the initial evaluation! Shall we congratulate you?

soldier: in the end, you have to be approved by the leader.

Zhao Weiguo: That's close.

Private: Actually, everyone knows me very well. I am a man with little fame and fortune.

Zhao Weiguo: That's right.

soldier: I have repeatedly expressed my position to the leader.

Zhao Weiguo: What do you say?

Soldier: The golden cup and the silver cup are not as good as the reputation of the people, the first prize and the second prize are not as good as the praise of the people, the pig hands and chicken hands are not as good as the people clapping their hands, and the bear's paw and goose's paw are not as good as the people clapping their hands.

Thank you!

Zhao Weiguo: rough words are not rough. That makes sense.

Off-site voice: Here comes the award order for outstanding actors! Here comes the award order for outstanding actors!

Zhao Weiguo: It's coming. I'll read it to you.

soldier: I'm not conscious.

Zhao Weiguo: Award for Excellent Actor!

soldier: let everyone laugh.

Zhao Weiguo: The actor plays an exemplary role everywhere.

soldier: this is what I should do.

Zhao Weiguo: Good at uniting comrades and helping others.

soldier: I'm used to it.

Zhao Weiguo: I always work hard and complain, and I don't care about my work.

soldier: it's all under the leadership.

Zhao Weiguo: This year, it was decided to award the honorary title of outstanding actor to Comrade Zhao Weiguo. Hey, hey, soldier, soldier, wake up! I didn't do anything

! Hey, ambulance, come to the ambulance! Hey, help!

soldier: why call an ambulance?

Zhao Weiguo: Help!

soldier: save who?

Zhao Weiguo: Hey, didn't you just pass out?

soldier: you wish I could die.

Zhao Weiguo: no, no.

Private: Zhao Weiguo.

Zhao Weiguo: Hey.

soldier: I can't tell!

Zhao Weiguo: Oh, soldier, you may have misunderstood.

soldier: I didn't misunderstand. Congratulations.

Zhao Weiguo: aye.

soldier: congratulations.

Zhao Weiguo: Thanks.

soldier: a brick will kill you. Dear friends present, my performance today is over. Goodbye.

Zhao Weiguo: Hey, hey, hey ... Private

Private: Don't touch me. Why touch me? Everybody, look at the excellent actors hitting people on the stage!

Zhao Weiguo: When did I hit you?

soldier: then why did you touch me?

Zhao Weiguo: Let's finish the cross talk!

soldier: I'm sorry, you are an excellent actor. Please tell us.

Zhao Weiguo: and you?

soldier: I am a backward actor now.

Zhao Weiguo: Huh?

soldier: not only am I going down, but also the host, the light hanging sound master, let's get off work together!

Zhao Weiguo: What do you mean after work?

soldier: let's let Zhao play all night from now on, shall we? Thank you for your understanding.

Zhao: Stop.

big: untenable.

Zhao: don't you dare. Isn't it just that you didn't judge the excellent actors? Just now, I kept saying that the audience were your second parents. Oh, you didn't recognize your parents until you were judged as an excellent actor. < P > You are so unfilial. Come here! Make a gift for your parents. Hurry up.

Da: Sorry, parents.

Zhao: That's right.

Da: I was abnormal just now.

Zhao: Huh?

da: I lost my temper

seek: scare me

da: well, for the sake of parents, I will accompany you to finish this crosstalk.

Look: That's right.

After that, let's go our separate ways.

Look: Okay, okay, no problem.

Big: OK,

Looking for: OK

Big: Go ahead.

looking for: yes. What do you mean, I'll tell you? Let's talk about this cross talk first.

Da: Yes, I did. Now that you are an excellent actor, please tell me first.

Find out: Is this comparable to excellent actors?

Da: Of course, it is clearly written in your award order. Does the actor play an exemplary role everywhere? If you don't speak first, I'll speak first! Say

Look for: I'll say it first. I'll say it first. Dear audience friends, good evening. Today we will tell you a cross talk. Hey, hey, oh, this cross talk is about a joke. This joke has to be told by two people. He can't

always say, "You're flailing!"!

big: what's wrong!

looking for: again, what?

big: I won't let you play an exemplary role!

look: I brought my head, it's your turn to say.

da: oh, you've finished wearing your hair. Then I'm sorry. You can say my words, too.

Look: Why should I say your words?

Da: It is clearly stated in your commendation order that the actor has always worked hard and worked hard, and no matter who wrote the words, you said it yourself. Come on, friends, let's applaud him and encourage him to tell a cross talk to the big family alone. Ok, thank you. Thank you.

Look: It's hard to say.

Da: The applause from friends here is not warm enough. Friends over there give him a coax! Ha ha ha ha

looking for: stop, all right. Get down, ah, get down while you can,

Da: Huh? What do you mean?

Look: It's better to have you here than not have you. Who are you? This is

Da: This is you asking me to go down?

Looking: You should leave before it's too late.

Big: Don't regret it.

Looking: I won't regret it.

Going down, going down

Looking: It's still a good way to judge outstanding actors.

Big: What's the big deal? Just go down,

Looking: hmm?

da: I'll go down as soon as I get down. I'll sit here and

look for: yeah, good! Then I will tell you this cross talk in a down-to-earth way, saying that there is an old man in our place,

soldier: (sitting on the steps making trouble) Liu Jie, Liu Jie, Liu Jie, you are also here, Liu Jie. hahaha. . Is that your husband next to you? Ah, it's your boyfriend. Haha, no wonder every time you bring

, the people are different. Ha ha ha,,,, Say it? Come on, let's applaud him to go on.

Look for: Thank you, thank you. Then I'll go ahead and pull. Said we had one there. . .

Big: Zhao Jie, Zhao Jie, Zhao Jie, you go to find your Zhao Jie, I admit it,

Find: Are you wicked? You and I will go on, saying that we are big: Mrs. Wang, Mrs. Wang, haha,,

Find: You don't have so many acquaintances!

big: what's the big deal! I say hello to you, and you say your cross talk.

Look for: No, you always say hello, but I can't say it.

Da: It's none of my business. You're excellent, and you're not fooling anyone! Mrs. Wang

Looking for: I beg you, would you please come up?

da: I'll go down if you let me.

Look for: Ah

Da: You asked me to come up and I'll come up again.

looking for: right.

big: I'm the elevator!

looking for: what's the elevator for?

da: I just found out today that sitting here is much more comfortable than standing on it. Everyone here wants me to continue sitting here. Please give me a round of applause. Thank you. See if my parents let me sit here?

I am filial piety

Looking for: be good, be good, be good. But there is one thing, you can't say hello to your acquaintances. Okay.

da: ok, don't call

find: ok, I'll officially talk about it. It is said that there is an old man in our country who likes to bet with others that he has that special function. Why, he said that he could bite his left eye.

You think this is interesting.

Da: It's boring. This old man has a false eye in his left eye. He takes him out and bites him and puts him back. This is also called crosstalk.

Looking for: He is even better, and he can bite his right eye. You can't fake both eyes, so it's funny, isn't it?

Da: It's even more funny. This old man has a pair of dentures, and he takes them off, bites them and presses them on. I wonder how such a person can be rated as an excellent actor.

Find: Here, here, I'll guess a riddle for everyone, saying that it's a dog from a distance and a dog from a close distance. If you hit it, it won't move, scold it and leave as soon as you pull it in the past.

Big: dead dog, who doesn't know?

Look: it's an electric fan from a distance, but it's an electric fan from a close look, but it just won't turn.

Big: there's no electricity.

Look: it's a car from a distance, but it's an automobile from a close look,

Big: there's no gasoline.

Look: Say far away.

Da: You can't say who makes you excellent, and you deserve it.

Look for: I'll tell you, soldier, and I'll tell you another one, and you can still guess.

big: how about it!

I'll give you the excellent actor.

What did you say?

Look: If you can still guess, I'll give you the excellent actor.

da: did you say that?

Find: I said

Big: Everybody testify for me

Find: Let's testify together, okay

Big: Make a question

Find: Listen

Big: Um

Find: Say that soldiers should pay more attention to dog soldiers,

Big: Am I not a dog then?

Looking for: dog soldiers are short of studying for private soldiers,

Da: Take that off for me

Looking for: Private soldiers, you have to make a choice,

Da: um

Looking for: Do you think this is "immoral" or "indispensable"?

Private: I am wicked

Looking for: You are a private if you are lacking

Big: huh? Wait a minute, I need

to find: you are a dog soldier, think about it, whether you are wicked or not. Say

big: you are wicked.