Teacher-student relationship

As we all know, the teacher-student relationship is very important. I would like to share some of my thoughts on the teacher-student relationship.

If the relationship between a teacher and a student is very tense, even if the teacher is very diligent and motivated, the grade of the class led by the teacher will definitely not improve. Why do you say that? Once the teacher-student relationship deteriorates and students have views, opinions, and conflicts with the teacher, the students will become annoyed, disgusted, or even resentful when they see the teacher. Once a student hates a teacher, there is no doubt that no matter how good the teacher's class is, the student will not listen, or even if he reluctantly listens, the effect will not be that good, and the final grade will definitely not be improved. On the contrary, if a teacher has a good relationship with students, and then supplements it with necessary methods, the results will definitely not be much worse.

The relationship between teachers and students is irreversible. Once the relationship between a teacher and a student becomes tense, it is very difficult to improve the relationship. There is a saying in English, You never get a second chance to make a first impression. But it is very difficult, which does not mean that it cannot be changed, but I have not seen any successful examples of the change so far. If the teacher-student relationship does not improve for a long time, students often ask to change teachers and attribute all their unsatisfactory and unsuccessful experiences to this teacher. This is definitely not fair, because the teacher himself must have done a lot of good things, but due to the overall problem, that is, the relationship is not good, the students may not be able to remember those local things, such as the kindness the teacher was to a certain student. . At this time, the teacher must feel that he was wronged, but this is the reality and we have to accept it. Similarly, if the class teacher of a class fails to manage the class well and class discipline has been very poor, after changing the class teacher, the students will think that all the problems come from that class teacher, and will not remember that they were part of the class that disrupted class discipline before.

I think a good teacher-student relationship should be when students like the teacher as a person, appreciate certain character traits and qualities of the teacher, and are also in awe. In other words, the distance between the class teacher and the students cannot be too close or too far. Therefore, it is definitely inappropriate to use the word "friend" to summarize the teacher-student relationship. If a student feels that the class teacher and he are friends, he will think that the relationship is equal. Then when the teacher asks him to do something, he may think that he is a friend. Why is he asking me to do this? Management will inevitably cause problems because he gets too close to the students. Similarly, if a class teacher knows little about students and only cares about learning issues or his own grades, then it can be said that this class teacher is a bit selfish. He is too far away from the students and cannot get into the students' hearts. The teacher-student relationship is indifferent, then this The cohesion of the class is definitely not very strong, and it may be what we usually call a mess. Note that when class cohesion is not strong, problems arise first from the teacher-student relationship, and then from the student-student relationship. Since the relationship between the class teacher and the students is relatively long, the trust between the students and the class teacher is relatively low. At this time, if the class teacher does not pay attention to the way he speaks and says something that satirizes the students or hurts the students' self-esteem, and Without timely remediation, the student may have a problem with the class teacher. If there are more students like this, the class may become unstable and may become a chaotic class or even change the class teacher.

As mentioned above, the teacher-student relationship should not be too far or too close. It can also be summarized as a soft and hard issue. I think class teachers need to follow four principles. First, when encountering issues of principle and bottom line, the class teacher must be tough and never compromise; second, don’t be tough when you shouldn’t be tough. If you can use teaching tact to solve it cleverly, try to rely on tact. At this time, Be careful not to be rude, otherwise once the students figure out the teacher, they may "play with the teacher", which means that the students will do this on purpose to deliberately anger the teacher and laugh at the teacher's jokes. This is a weakness. Try not to let students catch it; third, you must be soft when you should be soft. For example, when a student is sick, it is also the time when the student is most vulnerable. You must make the student feel that the teacher cares about them; fourth, you should not Don't be too soft when you are soft. For example, don't get too close to students without principles. When students make principled mistakes, the teacher does not criticize them, or the criticism is not strong enough, so that students do not realize the seriousness of the mistakes they made. The fourth point is very similar to the first point, but the emphasis is different.

The first point emphasizes the issue of principle, and the fourth point emphasizes the issue of distance.

The teacher-student relationship should be kept as moderate as possible, neither too close nor too far. I have just mentioned this, but these are some general principles, or strategies, but when it comes to specific campaigns or battles, there are many small points. For example, students will test the teacher's bottom line and try to discover the teacher's weaknesses. At this time, a battle of wits and courage is used. If a teacher wants to maintain victory, he must carefully study the current students and study their strengths. This advantage or shining point is very useful when encouraging underachievers. What are the weaknesses, especially the weaknesses of some naughty children, those who are persistent in looking for trouble? In the battle of wits and courage between teachers and students, if teachers can accurately grasp the weaknesses of these students, they can often seal their throats with a sword. Student A in the class can accurately discover the teacher's weaknesses, and then share the "experience of confronting the teacher" with other students. In the end, it is possible to form a group to fight against the teacher, and of course A is the boss. Once A is handled well, others will not dare to act wildly. Today's students have similarities and personalities with former students. Just like the war more than 70 years ago, today's war methods have changed, and new strategies and tactics need to be studied. We also need to constantly hone new skills when dealing with student problems. We cannot always use the methods of the past, and some of them no longer work.

Teachers should study students and pay more attention to their own words and deeds. They must have high demands on themselves and not let students grasp their weaknesses. A teacher's weaknesses are those that are easily exploited by students. For example, the relationship between teachers and students is not good, too close, too far, conflicting, unloving, not caring about students, irresponsible, lazy, sarcastic and sarcastic to students (whether intentional or not, teachers use unintentional excuses in this regard, It is also wrong), lack of prestige, talk but can’t do it, lectures are boring, long-winded, protracted lectures, dragging the class, too much homework, etc. are very common. This needs to be practiced slowly. I have made some of these mistakes before. Fortunately, I realized it. Therefore, we must be strict with ourselves and improve our own quality before we can impose certain requirements on students.