The most popular jokes this year

1. When I sniffed for the Nth time, the man looked at me with disgust, and my best friend quickly said: My friend has an IQ problem, that. . . She is mentally retarded. Her guardian had something to do today and asked me to take care of her. I had no choice but to bring her here. . .

2. Today I saw a Rolls-Royce driver hit a Chery. The young Rolls-Royce owner got out of the car and cursed. The Chery owner didn’t say anything. He waited until the Rolls-Royce owner said he was tired. The owner of the Chery car said calmly: "Young man, call your dad and tell him that what you are driving is a Chery A3."

3. I look darker and stronger. My girlfriend took me to her house. When I walked in, I shouted, "Dad! Mom! I brought you a pig that can grow cabbage!" My girlfriend's father looked at me and said with a smile: "Yoha! It's actually a wild boar!" . .

4. I remember when I was a child, my mother once took me to the hospital for an injection. The nurse who gave me the injection was an intern. I couldn't go down anymore, so I called the head nurse. The head nurse's technique was particularly powerful and the needle was inserted. Then she pulled it out again and said to the nurse next to her: "Did you see clearly? Let me try again!"

5. Although I broke up with my first love three years ago, I still can’t forget her. When I learned that she had been dumped by her boyfriend and was in the hospital for an abortion, I rushed to the hospital immediately. My first love saw me lying on the hospital bed and said calmly: "Are you here to see my joke?" I panicked: "How did you know..."

6. My wife did it I refused to repent of my wrongdoings, so I couldn't help but take action. Sometimes I just couldn't do it without fighting. No, after more than a dozen slaps, she touched my red and swollen face and said distressedly: "Stop hitting me. I know I was wrong. Isn't that okay!" I smiled coldly and said, "I forgive you this time, but I won't forgive you next time." You’re going to beat me to death, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

7. Wife: Husband, who do you think is more beautiful than my best friend? Husband: Wife, don’t compare yourself with others all day long! Wife: Just tell me, tell the truth, I will never embarrass you! The husband pointed at his wife’s chest and abdomen: To be honest, you are just not as good as the top, but more than the bottom! My wife just slapped me: Damn, I know you think I have small breasts and a big belly!

8. The coach asked us to rest the day before the second subject of the driving license test. A classmate and I decided to go to Zhanshan Temple to worship Buddha. As a result, this idiot shouted to a monk in front of the Buddha statue: "Taoist Master, where can we buy incense?" It was so embarrassing. I didn't know him.

9. I took a taxi and was waiting at the red light. The lady rushed out and bumped into the car... I can’t explain it now. The driver was so anxious that he had to pull me. Help him prove it! We got to know each other after going back and forth, and now we are engaged. I am so afraid that I will not have a good relationship with my future mother-in-law. After all, I once accused her of having sex. The gym is really an interesting place. You are running on the treadmill. , the people next door will always compete with you for speed. Once they find that they can't match your speed, they will compete with you to see who can run longer, and they will have to fight to the death.