Network funny brain teaser

A dog was wandering in the street and saw a notice in the window: "programmer wanted." Programming, team spirit, proficient in at least two languages. Equal opportunities. 」

The dog went in to apply and was rejected.

"I can't hire a dog to work in the company." The manager said.

Not convinced, the dog pointed to the words "equal opportunity" on the notice to protest.

The manager had no choice but to sigh and ask disdainfully, "Can you program?"? 」

The dog silently went to the computer, programmed it and worked accurately.

"Do you have team spirit?" The manager asked.

The dog turned and looked out of the door. A large group of wild dogs are waiting outside.

"I really can't hire a dog to do this job." The manager said angrily.

"Even if I can program and have team spirit, I need employees who are proficient in at least two languages. 」

The dog looked up at the manager and said, "Meow-oh. 」

Xiaomi is a game enthusiast and plays all kinds of games. When the summer vacation arrived, Xiaomi came to the software supermarket and saw a poster that read: Super Collection! Everyone is wonderful! Mercilessly capture the masterpieces of many players in summer time! I was overjoyed and bought one excitedly.

Xiaomi ran home in three steps and two steps, happily turned on the computer and carefully browsed the contents of the CD-ROM, and found that there was a game called "Blood of Computer Virus". What kind of game is it?

Xiaomi was curious and decided to install it. Click the installation program, and a beautiful installation screen appears on the computer screen, which reads: Advise junior players, this game is difficult, and few players pass the customs within two months. A super player like me, naturally, is another matter. Iosimi paid no attention to this, but his curiosity grew stronger. After the installation guide, the computer screen suddenly went black, which surprised Yosemite and made his forehead sweat. Oh, my God, what happened? Did it crash?

At this time, there are a few lines of typesetting on the screen:

Congratulations! Installation complete! Thank you for purchasing our products!

Congratulations on choosing a wonderful game!

Now your computer has been infected with 300 kinds, 2 100 kinds of viruses;

The purpose of this game is to train players' anti-virus skills;

Fully appreciate the fun of the game in antivirus;

See the game description for anti-virus methods;

Now press Enter to exit the installation;

Began to enjoy the "blood of computer virus hegemony"!

The monitor said, I am miserable. I show it to people every day.

The keyboard said: I am even worse, calling people every day.

The mouse said: I am so miserable that I am touched every day.

Chassis said: Are you as miserable as me? Give people belly buttons every day.

The CD-ROM drive said, I'm miserable. I plug in the power every day.

The floppy drive said: I am even worse, and no one is plugging it in for me now.

The USB flash drive said: Who is as miserable as me? Insert it here and there. If you are not careful, you will be infected.

Motherboard: Don't think that I'm happy to be plugged in by many things. Actually, I am the worst. They generally don't move when plugged in. That is a kind of pain.

Sound card: plug in the motherboard or scream all day.

Plug-in converter: You guys ~ ~ ~ Hey ~ ~ I plug someone in front of me, and then I'm going to plug in behind, so let's see who's mixed up ~!

Some time ago, "I" bought a TV card and installed it on the computer to watch TV. It happened that my girlfriend came to visit me. She is a computer idiot, so she will go to qq. I demonstrated it in front of her, and she really said in a worshipful tone, "You are so awesome, and the computer can watch TV?" "Nothing!"

"You are great!"

"Ha ha!"

"I want to play too!"

"good! You play first and I'll get you a drink. "

When I came back, I found my girlfriend missing, but I left a string of words on the computer screen:

C: TV.

bad command or file name

watch TV

bad command or file name

turn on the TV

bad command or file name

turn on the TV

bad command or file name

The TV is on.

bad command or file name

C: Open it

bad command or file name

I want to watch TV.

bad command or file name

C: I want to see Central 6.

bad command or file name

Chinese satellite TV

bad command or file name

C: ... I am going to watch TV!

bad command or file name

C: I am very angry.

bad command or file name

C: Are you going to let it go or not?

bad command or file name

c:@！ $! $! $! ~! @~! #~~%%@^@$^@$^$^

bad command or file name

C: smelly TV

bad command or file name

C: I won't play with you in the future

bad command or file name

C: Ouch ... Please ... open it.

bad command or file name

C: it's really not open

bad command or file name

is that true ....

bad command or file name

C: OK ... Remember that for me. ...

bad command or file name

C: format c:

Do not hesitate to write down your IP address when filling in your home address.

Don't care about your friends' phone numbers, but keep asking them "What's your website?"

Instead of calling your girlfriend for dinner, you sent her an email.

You are surprised to find that spam is a kind of food.

Ping others to see if they are awake; Point at them and see who they are; SYT them, see if they found you.

You try to find the end of the network, hoping to win a free T-shirt.

When introducing your wife to others, you say "this is mylady@home.wife" and then point to your son and say "client application".

When introducing her husband at the mixer, she said "my domain name server".

The most important signal to show that you are an internet enthusiast-say "pizza is coming!" " When you are hungry.