In a bad mood, someone tell a joke! ~ thanks

1. I came quietly and walked quietly, waving a dagger, leaving no one alive

2. When there is a bright moon, I look up

3. Heroes don't ask for a way out, hooligans don't look at their age

4. Roar when the road is rough, and then walk on

5. There is no windtight wall, nothing can't be done. Mencius said: Confucius is right!

7. Hold your hand and drag it away! If you don't leave, you will continue to drag away if you are dizzy!

8. Is it necessary to be big? Dinosaurs are not extinct as usual!

9. Parents fool their children into calling education; Children fool their parents and call them cheating; Fooling each other is called the generation gap.

1 don't talk to me about feelings. It hurts money.

11. love is putting your heart and soul into it, and then pulling out again!

12. The most contradictory place between lovers is dreaming about each other's future, but thinking about each other's past.

13. Before I could get involved, I was pulled out.

14. The hero is sad about the beauty pass. I am not a hero, but the beauty let me pass.

15. A man's brain likes a woman's heart, but his eyes like a woman's appearance.

16. Women like bad-looking men, not bad-looking men.

17. The salted fish turns over, or the salted fish

18. I'm not a prince. Why do girls always think that they should be a princess when they meet me?

19. Marriage is to put a cotton-padded coat on freedom, which is inconvenient to move around, but it will be warm.

2. Knowledge is like underwear, invisible but important.

21. As a typical failure, you are really successful.

22. When the boss uses you, you are a talent, and when you are not used, you become a layoff!

23. If you stay together for a long time, you will be divided, and if you stay together for a long time, you will be combined; Drinking will make you crazy, and you will drink whenever you drink

24. What's so unhappy about you? Say it to make everyone happy

25. In front of the China team, the Thai team wearing the yellow jersey also has the demeanor of the Brazilian team.

26. Women are made of water, men are made of mud, and Li Junji and Chris Lee are all made of cement.

27. Men who soak in bars are looking for excitement, while women are mostly stimulated.

28. Don't blame dogs for following them when they look like buns.

29. Only when pants lose their belts do they know what dependence is.

3. Smoking is not obedient, so we "smoke".

31. When a man meets a woman, there is only an anniversary, not an independence day.

32. When I close my eyes, I see my future ...

33. If I can tell my grievances, it is not a grievance; A lover who can be taken away is not a lover.

34. The breadth of the sea depends on the diving, and the broken drum can be beaten.

35. Apart from love, there are radishes in other people's fields.

36. If diamonds last forever, one will go bankrupt!

37. Lie down where you fall.

38. Explaining is covering up, and covering up is telling a story!

39. If you fall, get up and cry.

4. You told me to roll, and I rolled, and you told me to come back. Sorry, I rolled away!

41. Fall in love no matter how ugly you are, and talk about the world full of love!

42. The farmer's uncle planted corn in the field and harvested a lot of corn in autumn. I planted my husband in the field in spring, and now it's autumn. Gee, he's dead!

43. My wife said she wanted to see the lightning, so I cut the electricity with a kitchen knife

1. Planting grass doesn't make people lie down, so it's better to plant cactus instead!

2. I have a small mind, but I don't lack it; I have a good temper, but not without it!

3. The difference between people and pigs is that pigs are always pigs, but people are sometimes not people!

4. It turns out that as long as people are separated, no matter how familiar they are, they will gradually become alienated.

5. Go to the pizza shop to buy pizza! The waiter asked me if I should cut it into 8 pieces or 12 pieces. I thought about it and said: 8 yuan! 12 bucks can't be eaten!

6. A man fooling a woman is called flirting; Women fool men, called * *; Men and women fool each other, which is called love.

7. The government is thinking about how to collect taxes reasonably, the boss is thinking about how to avoid taxes reasonably, and I am thinking about how to sleep reasonably!

8. Time is for wandering, body is for loving, life is for forgetting, and soul is for singing.

9. Love is like a ghost. Many people believe it, but few people see it.

1. How far is it forever? Get the hell out of here, boy!

11. I met a writer's signature: maybe it seems to be, but it may not be. I met a GG signature: Give me a girl and I can create a nation.

12. Since I turned into shit, no one has stepped on my head.

13. I want to puppy love, but it's already late ...

14. Oh, my God! My clothes have lost weight again.

the important task of post-15 and post-8 is to manufacture post-8.

16. People have plenty of backgrounds, but I only have my back.

17. Gold always shines, but when there is gold everywhere, I don't know which one I am.

18. It is very important to remind everyone to learn to repair their notebooks! Once upon a time, there was a man who couldn't repair his notebook ... Everyone knows what happened afterwards.

19. I'm not a fortune teller in the square, so I can't talk so much about what you like to hear.

2. It's not that the ending of the story is not good enough, but that we ask too much of the story!

21. Flowers often belong to cow dung instead of people who appreciate them.

22. The difference between a lie and an oath is that the listener takes it seriously and the speaker takes it seriously.

23. Being single is not difficult. What is difficult is to deal with those who try their best to make you end being single.

24. Sometimes, it's not that the other person doesn't care about you, but that you take the other person too seriously.

25. even believe has a lie hidden in the middle.

26. A true good friend is not having endless topics together, but being together, even if you don't talk, you won't feel embarrassed.

27. There is no other half with 1 points, only two people with 5 points!

28. People who are usually willing to stay and argue with you are the ones who really love you!

29. There is no rehearsal in life, and every day is live broadcast; Not only the ratings are low, but also the salary is not high.

3. Nothing that can be solved with money is a problem, but the problem is that I am poor.

31. Only women and heroes are sad, but only wives and jobs are hard to find.

32. After meeting me, you will suddenly find that-ah, handsome can be so specific!

33. Ask a colleague, "Did you buy PetroChina?" Colleagues said, "Bah! You just bought PetroChina. Your whole family bought PetroChina and Sinopec! "

34. I ordered two dishes in the canteen at noon. After eating the first one, I was shocked. "Is there anything worse in the world?" I cried after eating the second one. "It's really there.".

35. When a mouse gets angry, everyone is a sick cat.

36. Life is like a coffee table. Although it is not big, it is full of tragedy.

37. Listen to your words and save me ten books!

at the age of 38 and , he appeared and made progress every day at the age of 1. 2-year-old dreams, 3-year-old hard work. At the age of 4, he is basically oriented, and at the age of 5, he is popular everywhere. Playing mahjong at the age of 6, wandering around at the age of 7. 8-year-old lesbians are common, and 9-year-old lesbians are hanging on the wall!

39. Boss, two Jin of true love first, and take it back to feed the dog!

4. "Honey, I'm … I'm pregnant … for three months, but don't worry, it's not yours, you don't have to be responsible for it …"

41. We have a little disagreement: she wants me to turn dung into gold, and I hope she treats gold like dung.

42. After studying Chinese for 1 years, it is better to talk about QQ for half a year.

43. I was lazy in bed in the morning, so I took out six coins from my pocket: if all six coins were heads, I would go to class! I've been thinking about it for a long time, but forget it. Don't take the risk ...

44. I bought a pottery jar of the Western Zhou Dynasty for 8, yuan, and yesterday I went to the column of Jianbao for identification. The expert seriously said, "Which one of these is from the Western Zhou Dynasty?" This is from last week! "

45. I can tolerate a fake figure, a fake face, a fake chest and a fake hip! ! ! But I just don't tolerate money. Yes! ! ! !

46. A scholar plays dead for a confidant, and a woman has plastic surgery for a self-pleaser.

47. Don't wait until everyone says you are ugly before you realize that you are really ugly.

48. personals: The requirements are as follows: A is alive and B is female.

49. Give me some sunshine and I will rot.

5. Only by eating a little properly can you lose weight.

51. Shake and shake to Naihe Bridge.

52. Q: What do you like about me? A: I like you to stay away from me!

53. Come back quickly, I can't fool you alone!

54. Life is like Song Zude's mouth, and you never know who will be unlucky next ~ ~

55. If you fall, get up and cry ~ ~

56. Besides teeth, there is love.

57. A dinosaur went to the toilet when passing by Xi 'an Jiaotong University. After coming out, she sobbed, "555, I finally won't worry about getting married in my life ..."

58. Life is easy. Live, easy. Life is not easy.

59. How much sorrow can you have, just like a group of eunuchs going to a brothel ...

6. When we were young, we often made faces at the mirror. In old age, the mirror is even.

61. If something goes wrong, look for the reason from yourself first. Don't blame the earth for its lack of gravity when you are constipated.

62. Make a decision by patting your head, make a pledge by patting your chest and leave.

63. We walk too fast, and our souls can't keep up ...

64. Don't be as knowledgeable as people on earth ~ ~

65. Come out and mix, and your wife will change sooner or later!

66. When I was a child, I thought I could save the whole world when I grew up. When I grew up, I found that the whole world could not save me ...

67. Even if I were a toad, I would never marry my mother toad.

68. Why sleep for a long time before death? You will sleep after death ...

69. A tailor who doesn't want to be a cook is not a good driver.

7. You told me to roll, and I rolled. You asked me to come back. I'm sorry, but I'm gone.

71. After that, you ignored me, and I became a dog ~ ~!

72. catch the bus in the morning, and when we get to the platform, the bus has already started. So I had to chase and shout, "Master, wait for me! Master, wait for me! " At this time, a passenger leaned out of the window and said to me, "Wukong, don't chase." ...

73. See you soon after graduation; I will have a wife one year after graduation; Later I regretted having a wife; Later, there will be a stepmother; I regret having a second wife most

74. If I don't hit you, you don't know that I am both civil and military.

75. I like you so much that you will die if you like me.

76. There is a grave in my heart, where the dead are buried.

77. I allow you to walk into my world, but you are not allowed to walk around in my world ...

78. Be patient or cruel.

79. Although you are wearing cologne, I can still vaguely smell scum.

8. Journey to the West tells us that all monsters with backgrounds have been taken away, and all those without backgrounds have been killed by a stick

81. I want to grow old with you if I am not careful

82. The merry-go-round is the most cruel game in the world, chasing each other, but always separated by a sad distance

83. The ideal is full, but the reality is very skinny < Write love as love

85. Wait for your concern, and when I close my heart

86. When I love you, whatever you say is what you want. What do you say you are when I don't love you?

87. Love until it hurts

88. I'm not RMB, how can everyone like me?

89. If you are doomed to fail to give me the expected response, then keep it at a safe distance

9. Our goal: look at money and make money from it

91. If you are in a bad mood, go to the supermarket to pinch instant noodles (super right! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! )

92. Get out of here, and get out of here without stopping ...

93. It's only in the dead of night that I miss you so much.

94. Please don't take my tolerance for you as your shameless capital.

95. Zhuge Liang didn't lead a soldier before he came out of the mountain. Why do you want me to have work experience?

96.

99. Happiness is a comparative level, and you can't feel it until something is at the bottom.

1. It is said that it is a stranger to the end of the world ~ What is the end of the world? Turn around and turn your back on you. Now it's the end of the world ...

11. Pure, fictional, chaotic and beautiful.

12. After leaving, don't say wish me happiness. What qualifications do you have to wish me happiness?

13. Some things we know are wrong, but we should stick to them because we are unwilling. Some people, we know we love, have to give up because there is no ending; Sometimes, we know that there is no road, but we are still moving forward because we are used to it.

14, be good to yourself, because life is not long; Be nice to the people around you, because you may not meet them in the next life!

15. You will never see me when I am loneliest, because I am loneliest only when you are not by my side.

16. Remember what should be remembered and forget what should be forgotten. Change what can be changed and accept what can't be changed

17. Time is the only thing that can wash away everything except tears. The longer time goes by, the lighter the conflict becomes, just like tea that is constantly diluted.

18. Complaining is the greatest offering that God can get from mankind, and it is also the most sincere part of human prayer.

19. The price of wisdom is contradiction. This is a joke of life on the outlook on life.

11. Girls in the world always think they are proud princesses (except a few)